Today, at my bachelorette party, I got so wasted, I ended up giving my stripper a lap dance because he "wasn't doing it properly". There's photos. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to my fiance's cousin's wedding with him. I got drunk and danced like a stripper in front of his entire extended family, who I'd just met that day. FML
Today, I had to cancel my wedding because my fiancé is so hungover from his bachelor party, he's throwing up all over the place, can't stand up straight and is calling me by the stripper's name he met yesterday night. FML
Today, I was attending my bachelor party. I watched a very attractive young girl dancing on a pole, giving me a seductive look. As she walked up to me, I realized it was my soon-to-be wife's younger sister. FML
Today, I went to a party that my friends were throwing. I had a great time and got blackout drunk. I woke up to videos from my girlfriend from last night. At some point I'd managed to take off my shorts and boxers and spent the rest of the party naked from the waist down. FML
Today, my friend and I went to a club. She said I look hilarious when I dance drunk. I was completely sober. FML
Today, my best friend was throwing me my bachelorette partly. A cop came by and said there have been complaints about the noise. Thinking he was the stripper we ordered, we pulled him into the house. He was an actual cop. FML
Today, I gave my drink to a girl who I got with previously and started to dance with her. She backed off after a few seconds, took my drink and danced with my friend who was standing right next to me. FML
Today, I walked into work after being completly wasted last night. I was sitting in a meeting when all of a sudden the presenter had gotten an e-mail saying "crazy girl dances on tables at local bar". So obviously everyone wanted to watch it. That crazy girl was me. FML
Today, my wife got so drunk she kissed another guy when the ball dropped. FML
Today, I hired a babysitter, so my husband and I could spend some time together and work on our failing marriage. I dressed up. We went out. He got drunk and puked on me. FML
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Top comments
anniebananie 3
That's okay! What happens at a bachelor(ette) party, stays at the bachelor(ette) party. It would be completely evil for your friends to ever mention it to anyone.
_THE_MASTER_ 0
look, I'm not saying YDI for being drunk, I'm saying YDI for not anticipating that you'd do something like that at your bachelorette party. and come one, it's not that bad. it's not like you ****** the guy. the photos are just something you'll look back on one day and laugh hysterically at.
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Comments (144)
Intoxicunt 6
Am I the only one whose comments are ******* up royally and switching around a lot, or is that just FML being crazy?
plexico 4
No, Toxi, the comments seem to be more unstable than ever (and I'm not talking about the content this time.) It's probably for the best -- I'm not sure I'd want you to take me up on the crotch-kick deal I proposed on another post.
Intoxicunt 6
I read the one about the blumpkin, and replied, but you have to refresh a lot to see it. Is that the one you mean? Because if that's a deal...then I accept! Ha, no givsies backsies (or however that's supposed to go).
plexico 4
Just my luck! That comment stuck while my quoting David Allen Coe to Lyrics boy disappears!
Intoxicunt 6
Good. Blumpkins > David Allen Coe. :)
_THE_MASTER_ 0
lol. blumpkin...that wods totes makes me smile
XOfiestypixie 0
Don't know what either of those are, but I agree that the comments are messed, there's random replies everywhere that don't make sense. And yes I know proper grammar would be "there are random replies", but I don't care. I also know that it's improper to start a sentence with "and", but I don't care about that right now either. Take that, grammar nazis! XD
eminemlvr 0
LMFAOOOO...that just made my day!!!
crazyyylooper 0
there ARE photos, they are plural, so there ARE photos, not there is.
supermike33 0
It depends where you live. It could be both.
proud_liberal 0
you drank so ur an alcoholic. please go kill yourself, you are scum and prolly a republican
CraziOne 0
Not everyone who drinks is an alocoholic just so you know. It was a party to celebrate her last free day. Why wouldn't she drink? Some people just go out to drink in a social setting. Alcoholics drink alone. Or with a cat. Oh and its probably not prolly. Go eat Nancy Pelosi's croth you dumb liberal ****.
misssweetie 0
Exactly what does drinking have to do with being republican, you judgmental dick?
StarChan 2
I agree with #53 :3
supermike33 0
People here take this shit way too seriously. He was probably just kidding.
Pandasaur 0
There're = there are. They're = they are. Yeah, it's not a real contraction, but you can't substitute it like that. You got it wrong the first time. Typing it in caps doesn't make you right. Get over it.
kbaker90 0
Isn't that the point of a bachelorette party? Plus, now your husband knows how lucky he is that his wife can give a good lap dance.
iFruit 0
sexy
_THE_MASTER_ 0
either that or they're being sarcastic
misssweetie 0
No big deal. Seriously. The first time I ever got drunk I kissed a stripper. A female stripper. And my boyfriend got over it.... quickly
CraziOne 0
Thats becuase guys like seeing girls makeout with other girls.
misssweetie 0
girls do not like that!!!!!
thedrumsthedrums 0
girls do, we are just told to repress ourselves.
Chubtubdaplaya 0
How is this is an FML? If anything, it's a win for you and the stripper you danced for. Unless you're ugly/fat, in which case, it's a FHL for the stripper.