Today, at a family Seder, (a Jewish service for Passover), my mom served matzah balls during the festive meal. Considering how much I love matzah balls and there aren't many options for me to eat because I'm a vegetarian, I shouted, "I like really big balls!" in front of my entire family. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, we went up for visitor's day for my son's Jewish summer camp. We don't keep kosher, but most of his fellow campers do. When we went around in the circle saying our favorite foods, he said, "My mom makes the best pork chops." We got dirty looks for the rest of the day. FML
Today, when I told my family I was a vegetarian, I expected them to make fun of me because that's just my family. But what I wasn't expecting was my dad to use raw meat as a puppet and make it say, "Eat me! Eat me!" then throw it at my face. FML
Today, my family asked where I wanted to go for my birthday dinner. They shot down my every suggestion and decided on sushi. I'm allergic, so the only thing I could eat was a veggie appetizer. Dad said I need to "expand my palate." FML
Today, my boyfriend came over to my parents' house for dinner. My dad made Holocaust jokes the entire time. My boyfriend is Jewish. FML
Today, my mom tried a new recipe for dinner. She proudly served what she called "gourmet vegetable stew." One bite later, I had to fight every urge to not gag. She asked me how it tasted, and with a straight face, I said, "Delicious!" She then asked for my honest opinion, so I told her it was, um, "an acquired taste." She hasn’t spoken to me since. FML
Today, my Jewish boyfriend came over for my extended family's Easter party. My grandmother made fun of him for being Jewish so badly, that he left, crying. She doesn't see what she did wrong. FML
Today, my mom told me she is serving lasagna and Italian cream cake at my bridal shower. I'm severely lactose intolerant, which I have been telling her for years. She responded by telling me, and I quote, "The food is for the guests." FML
Today, for my family, my most impressive quality is I can make spaghetti and meatballs. FML
Today, my dad was making a sandwich in the kitchen. Hungry, I snuck in and grabbed it, running back to my room and devouring it. Later at dinner, he dumped a whole scoop of rice in my lap. We all ended up laughing as we cleaned it. FML
Today, my dad announced to the whole family that we will be having a vegetarian dinner this Christmas to make my step-mum happy. FML
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Top comments
Aethren 0
Today I forgot to put sugar in my coffee, FML.
ijkl0marissa 0
Uhm.. why did you shout that? Besides, matzo ball soup (at least at my seder) has chicken in it, and is served in broth, so it isn't a very vegetarian option..
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Comments (174)
Dabookofnothing 0
hahaa that must suck
Dabookofnothing 0
?/ /? / This is Bob. He already took over youtube. Now lets help bob take over the entire interweb. Copy/paste him in every comment on anywebsite and soon he will be the most known stick figure ever.
kandy_fml 0
Why did you even say "big balls"? You could have just said, I like matzah balls. This one sucks.
dz_zb 0
#15: Because people like to come on this site and read something funny, something genuinely ****** up. Not something second rate that could happen to anyone and isn't even a big deal. That's why.
tWitt3rBuG 0
Uh?!?
emorockerownage 9
i bet you do
rko_fml 0
and?
breaksprinter_ 0
did everything go quiet and then everyone look at you? not much of an fml.
PureGold 0
I doubt you really said that, or at least you didn't shout it...you had matzah balls at seder, then though of FML and how it would be embarrassing if you shouted "I like really big balls!" in front of your family. So you submitted it here for a laugh. I could be wrong, but this is just one of those scenarios it would be really easy to make up. And if you did actually say it, it was in front of your family...big deal. They knew what you were talking about and you all just laughed it off. Not much of an FML. I agree though, matzah balls are amazing xD.
sschr99 0
That sucks, I know if I said that in front of my polish relatives they would be mortified. Anyways, Happy Passover to you and your family! Oh and #40, you're ignorant and your comment is not even offensive because you can't spell and people can clearly see how dumb you are. Get a life