Today, as my dad was handing me my Christmas gift, he pats me on the shoulder and says, "These were mine, hope you enjoy them as much as I did." Thinking it was something special of his he wanted to hand down to me, I quickly unwrapped the box only to find old 70's porn. Merry Christmas? FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I turned 18. My dad congratulated me and gifted me his collection of old porn magazines. Not bad, dad, but perhaps not during family dinner next time. FML
Today, I went to my parents house to secretly collect all of their home videos and convert them to DVDs as a Christmas gift. Among them I found a sex tape my parents had made. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me his Christmas gift to me was custom made. I told my parents in excitement, thinking it could possibly be a ring. Half an hour later he told me what it was; a molded dildo of his penis. It's going to be an awkward conversation with my parents when they ask what I got. FML
Today, while helping my dad look for his watch, I found his porn collection. FML
Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and lingerie, but still my dad showed up later at my new place, handed me a box full of them all, and simply said, "I don't want to know." FML
Today, I found out that my father has taken my copy of Modern Warfare 3, and re-wrapped it as a Christmas present. FML
Today, I thought my mom and I could put aside our differences and open our Christmas presents. When she opened mine, she turned to my dad and said she didn't want the present, so I could give it to someone else. 'Tis the season. FML
Today, my brother and I woke up early to get a sneak peek at our Christmas presents. We found our parents having sex on the couch. FML
Today, I opened my Christmas presents with my husband. One of the things he got me was a ball gag. "Yeah," he said with a grin, "That one's more for me but I didn't wanna buy myself headphones." Cue our son asking me what it was. FML
Today, I had a look through my dad's girlfriend's phone she left on the table. Best part: I now know what I'm getting for Christmas. Worst part: I now know my dad's favourite position. FML
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Top comments
Ninjaface 0
So did you have a white Christmas?
ps2stony 0
Lols that's gross to fap to the same thing your dad did
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Comments (81)
XxSKELETOxX 0
What's wrong with hairy beavers? Eh?
dajohnsays 0
You have very little to be upset about.
jpest17 5
depends if you a guy or not lol
Skee94 0
I'll take em if u don't want em
redshortsx 0
that's gross I have no idea if my da watched that nary shit bu if he did I don't want to know about it
Curiousmind 0
How is that a downer? I'm a girl and I love 70s ****. Yes, it's cheesy but also simple and more natural. I think some of today's trashy movies can take a few tips from the golden era of the industry.
mrs_sean_flanery 0
I know right!
karinka 0
lol your dad is awesome! keep it for your son
grampa_pubes666 0
um fyl? pshh lucky!!
bostonfan 0
man yuck 70s **** is the worst
MissAmz 7
And I suppose fake ****, hair, lips and stick-thin women with no curves (except for the implants) aren't the worst? The ones where you can see their ribs and where their extensions are glued in? The ones that go overboard with the obvious screaming and moaning? No thanks! Lol
xrod_fml 0
**** is a fml hell no when your dad gives you **** you go hell yeah!!!!!