Today, as I was leaving the office, I heard my very cute coworker behind me say "Hey gorgeous, where are you off to?" I turned around with a smile and said "About to hit up happy hour." He was on the phone with his wife. I'm calling in sick tomorrow. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my husband got on a business call, but he was not using his usual booming, baritone voice. Instead, he was soft and sweet and began with, "Hey, how have you been?" and quickly went into his office. Curious, I listened outside his door. It was a female co-worker. The work talk was waaaay too fun and familiar. FML
Today, my co-worker handed me the phone and said it was my boyfriend calling, so I answered "Hello, Love!" It was my boss. FML
Today, at work, my phone rang. My intern answered it and told me it was a coworker who'd just left. I picked up and said "What's up bitch? What are you going to complain about now?!" It was actually my boss. FML
Today, my boss phoned me and asked me why I wasn't at work. I was in the staff room. I'd said hello to her as I came in the door. FML
Today, I went to a social event with a very attractive male co-worker. Things were going awesome, we were flirting and really hitting it off. Then his 'wife' called. FML
Today, I got up early and really put some extra effort into my appearance to catch the eye of a cute guy at work. I walked in and the woman who sits at the desk beside me looks over and says, "Wow, are you sick? You're not looking too good." FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's work to surprise him. When I got there, I called him on his phone to tell him to turn around. I saw him look at his phone. His co-worker next to him asked who that was. He replied, "Just this fat chick I know." FML
Today, my cute coworker begged me to cover his shift tomorrow, and told me that he wanted to take me to dinner to make up for it. I was very excited because I've been crushing on him for a long time. I later overheard him tell his friend that he didn't plan on showing up for our dinner. FML
Today, I called out of work, making an elaborate claim my wife was sick, and that I HAD to stay home to take care of her, because I have never played hooky from work before. That afternoon, at a minor league hockey game as I'm buying a hotdog with my wife, my boss from behind me asked, "How's the fam?" FML
Today, I accidentally said, "Bye, love you," to a co-worker as I clocked out. Before I made it home, I had six missed calls and a long text from my co-worker professing her love to me. FML
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Top comments
Jimboom 12
Noo, he obviously picked up the phone and pretended to be speaking to his wife... heck he probably made up the wife thing to because he was embarrassed. Cause you know, everyone must think you are as good looking as you obviously do. :-P
tpea 1
This seems to happen to me a lot. :$
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Comments (105)
bstoll499 0
love the confidence
sourgirl101 29
He was on the phone. He probably didn't even hear you.
fearfulsymmetry 1
Seriously? You're going to call in for that? How old are you? YDI for thinking that a married man was putting the moves on you and you being okay with that.
Shinygirlnz 1
Agreed with #64.
Trollz4daLULZ 2
YDI for having a job instead of staying in the kitchen, for being gorgeous, for thinking you're gorgeous, for hoping to lead a married man astray and into not only fornication but adultery, for going to a bar instead of buying a bottle from a liquor store to take home and drink from by yourself, and for planning to lie about being sick to get out of work you lazy twat.
beastmcbeastly 0
you just said u were going to get drunk and call in sick tomorrow
mooshibear140 4
That kind of shit happen all of the time to me. :P only not as bad.
IsaidSTFU 0
FML really needs a "suck it up, you pansy" button....
puddyria 0
****
Alexisfbaby6 0
Epic fail lol
spamandritz 2
yes tomorrow...and the next day...and the next day...etc