Miscellaneous: Today, after years of battling my social anxiety issues, I went... - FML

By lehonj49 - 21/06/2013 16:10 - Australia - Burwood

Today, after years of battling my social anxiety issues, I went out clubbing with my friends. A girl started talking to me and we actually hit it off. The next thing I know, I'm on the floor getting wailed on by some bloke for hitting on his girlfriend. She didn't do a thing to stop him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 870

You deserved it 3 692

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/12/2012 21:28 - United States

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 560

You deserved it 3 201

By Anonymous - 03/12/2011 02:02 - United Kingdom

Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 867

You deserved it 4 745

By Anonymous - 02/02/2013 23:03 - Belgium - Schepdaal

Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 306

You deserved it 3 784

By ThisIsWhyIStayAtHome - 24/05/2014 00:09 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I was at a nightclub when some dick squeezed the ass of the girl beside me. She whirled around and started yelling and slapping me across the face. I was dragged out by the bouncers, to cheers from the people around us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 352

You deserved it 3 411

By lonelyboy101 - 27/08/2009 00:37 - United States

Today, I was at a club with my girlfriend of a year. A guy starts hitting on her while I'm sitting right next to her. He then asks her to go back to his place for some fun, so I start laughing thinking that there is no chance she would even consider this. I walked home alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 929

You deserved it 8 632

By Anonymous - 01/12/2012 00:31 - United States - Rocklin

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 197

You deserved it 21 673

By Anonymous - 30/06/2009 18:57 - Canada

Today, I saw a drunk guy hitting on a girl sitting alone at the bar. She insisted that her boyfriend was there, but he didn't relent. So I went over and put my arm around her and asked "Who's this guy?" He walked away, but then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was her boyfriend. He broke my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 669

You deserved it 13 138

By *facefloor* - 24/07/2012 20:08 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 100

You deserved it 5 426

By Anonymous - 24/12/2011 02:49 - Australia

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 158

You deserved it 41 765

Party hard

By vcarder - 04/10/2013 20:25 - United States - Newton

Today, I met a really nice girl at a club. One thing led to another, and she told me to meet her out front in 5 minutes. I was so drunk that I stumbled into the restroom instead, then curled up on the floor crying in despair when I realized my mistake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 984

You deserved it 43 219

Next

Top comments

mspiggy3712 11

Saturday 22 June 2013 2:14

Therapists everywhere..... give a discount to this guy...

purplemango 21

Saturday 22 June 2013 2:15

I hope you're fine now. Congrats on going out! :) I hope you won't get discouraged by this.

Comments

sammyjo06 14

Sunday 23 February 2014 4:58

I would've called the police and had him charged for assault.

Baller_Bob 17

Tuesday 11 March 2014 23:31

What a bitch and an assfuck

fantasyworld 37

Sunday 23 August 2015 18:41

Some girls like to see their boyfriend fight over her. It's ridiculous.

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Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 057

You deserved it 12 808

Today, I was unaware that me losing my virginity was also breakup sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 153

You deserved it 3 242

Today, after almost a year of no steady work, I struggled to get anything done once my 7-months pregnant girlfriend woke up at noon. She wanted to talk the whole time, and eventually broke down crying because of her relationship with her mother. I spent the the day consoling her. No wonder I can't get any work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 640

You deserved it 796

Today, I'm having an existential crisis. I don't what the future holds, I'm overthinking and stressing about things I could've controlled. Now I'm having a breakdown and I've got a test tomorrow and I have to take a bath, but all my lazy ass does is worry but never actually do the fucking work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 798

You deserved it 517

Today, I was supposed to be meeting my daughter's boyfriend, but my wife has locked me in the basement until he leaves, so there’s no chance of me tormenting the boy. Quite wise on her part, I had all kinds of evil ideas, but now I’m locked in here, I’m bored as hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 316

You deserved it 2 583

Today, I got a missed call from a job that I really really want. I completely forgot that my answer machine message was a ridiculous and rude poem that I recorded previously when I was drunk. Somehow I don't think I'll be getting a call back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 089

You deserved it 39 658