Today, I got a call informing me that my 16-year-old daughter had been arrested for shoplifting jewellery. Trying to look on the bright side, I assumed...

By Pissed.Off.Mom. - 6/10/2016 05:14 - United States - Houston

Today, I got a call informing me that my 16-year-old daughter had been arrested for shoplifting jewellery. Trying to look on the bright side, I assumed it was for my birthday that is coming up in a few days. Nope. It was a "Thank you" gift. For her drug dealer. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14054

You deserved it

2482

Favorite

Kids

Previous FML Next FML

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By ab290 | 10

#6699689 - Thursday 6 October 2016 16:43

I'm assuming you are not her drug dealer?

By Tannasgh | 22

#6699706 - Thursday 6 October 2016 17:15

It could have been worse, she coulda paid him with "favors"

Comments

By One_In_Three | 24

#6699687 - Thursday 6 October 2016 16:41

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

Rykers | 18

#6699691 - Thursday 6 October 2016 16:44

You would assume she asked her daughter?

potatocouch | 16

#6699699 - Thursday 6 October 2016 16:59

Obviously you didn't read the first words. "I got a call..."

masterminor | 16

#6699743 - Thursday 6 October 2016 19:44

I think he meant how did she find out it was for her drug dealer, in which case, #4 would probably be correct.

bambisapphic | 18

#6699770 - Thursday 6 October 2016 21:24

well, most kids don't tell their parents the details of their relationship with their drug dealer.

One_In_Three | 24

#6699781 - Thursday 6 October 2016 22:30

Thank you #30

By ab290 | 10

#6699689 - Thursday 6 October 2016 16:43

I'm assuming you are not her drug dealer?

By StormfrontX33_fml | 24

#6699690 - Thursday 6 October 2016 16:44

The only bright side anyone should be seeing is your daughter and the bright light she'll see when you smack some sense into her. I normally don't condone corporal punishment, but she needs to be set straight before it's too late.

Atlas1960 | 16

#6699732 - Thursday 6 October 2016 19:00

I suggest that you shouldn't have kids

19teej96 | 19

#6699740 - Thursday 6 October 2016 19:36

I gotta say I agree with you. I too am not a fan of corporal punishment but some circumstances do call for it. Especially something as serious as this. My parents were quite generous with the belt and wooden spoon and I turned out alright.

Rexsace102 | 5

#6699741 - Thursday 6 October 2016 19:42

Why. Oh no i whopped them now I'm the worst person to ever live for disciplining my children

deathshead | 19

#6699751 - Thursday 6 October 2016 20:10

I love the downvotes people are getting for suggesting physical punishment is a bad thing, I'll be honest, I was always more afraid of my parent's disapproval than any hand or spoon, and even so, I learned pretty damn quick I misbehave and I get the spoon, a lecture, and disapproval...
That was deterrent enough for me.
my brother on the other hand was a bit of a pathological liar...
actions speak louder than words...
after countless lectures the thing to set him straight was one good session with a spoon.

Tripartita | 44

#6699754 - Thursday 6 October 2016 20:23

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

dtut | 15

#6699771 - Thursday 6 October 2016 21:34

you have way to much time on your hands...

cuz803 | 31

#6699776 - Thursday 6 October 2016 22:01

Smacking kids or physical punishment is terrible

Tripartita | 44

#6699777 - Thursday 6 October 2016 22:03

I don't know about you, #37, but typing about 13 sentences doesn't take much time. Maybe you're way *too slow.

cuz803 | 31

#6699782 - Thursday 6 October 2016 22:47

or maybe you're faster than normal 41

Stripez234 | 16

#6699797 - Thursday 6 October 2016 23:59

There's a difference between discipline and abuse. Don't compare spanking to breaking an arm. It's like comparing a pet cat to a feral tiger

Stripez234 | 16

#6699801 - Friday 7 October 2016 0:11

I don't condone physical violence either and I know all parents hate having to hurt their kid (except for abusers). But there come's a time where you've tried to do everything you can from restrictions, limitations, positive reinforcement to encourage good behavior, etc. in this situation, I'd say physical discipline is the right choice here. Spanking can cause some long term side effects, yes, but in this situation, the daughter will know damn quick to not do that again. It's like a last resort of punishment that almost guarantees a short term solution.

But spanking is NOT abuse. Abuse is extremely damaging the kid to the point of death or hospitalization. And both outcomes can happen physically and psychologically.

Closing thoughts: I do not like spanking, and I don't condone it. But if nothing else works, you have to do something to prevent this behavior. There are two extremities to punishment: no punishment and abuse. If the kid starts walking all over you, you may have to do a more severe punishment to balance it out. Like a yin and yang. Share your thoughts.

Siriusproblem | 10

#6699805 - Friday 7 October 2016 0:16

#34 how is your comment about #33 fair? He state he was a kid when he was hit. Even though you didn't directly say '#33 you're a weak little person,' you implied it. The 'so no surprises there' is a downgrade on his character. I don't believe someone is weak because they were hit when he was younger, and from the rest of your argument is appears you don't either.

Also, I know my Grammer and structure isn't perfect, so please don't point that out a flaw, because that's just petty.

Tripartita | 44

#6699806 - Friday 7 October 2016 0:18

Agreed, #47, there is a difference: "discipline" is whatever beating you're comfortable with, and "abuse" is whatever you aren't.

My grandfather beat the shit out of my mother and genuinely believed it was "discipline". Saying there's a difference doesn't make it so.

One can compare cats and tigers by saying they're both felidae, and I'll compare so called "discipline" to abuse by saying children can recover from both, which justifies neither.

Wutdafuqq | 24

#6699813 - Friday 7 October 2016 0:32

'Disipline' has kind of a Pandora's box sort of effect. Perhaps spanking isn't that bad, or maybe it is, but allowing corporal discipline just gives abusive parents free reign. Nowadays child support exists, but back then, parents could beat the shit out of their children and nobody would bat an eyelash. I'd much rather no 'disipline'.

DanaeZee | 16

#6699828 - Friday 7 October 2016 1:43

Is it not forbidden to hit / bodily punish your kid in the US?
I am a bit surprised because I thought this was also a law (I don't know why I thought this).

Bearsmomma | 30

#6699840 - Friday 7 October 2016 3:20

no, it isnt. As long as there are no bruises or long standing marks, a spanking on the rear end is acceptable. If aim is off or the kid moves and the thigh is hit, it can cause problems (I think). I do know a spanking on the butt is okay, as I said, with no lingering marks from it.

Stripez234 | 16

#6699843 - Friday 7 October 2016 3:29

You're not understanding, 51. Spanking to prove a point and mercilessly beating a kid for your own pleasure are two different things. Comparing them is as disgusting as your logic. I'm not going to slam my kid into a wall or something for breaking a vase, because at that point it becomes abuse, not discipline. You know the difference between a moderation and an extremity right?

Stripez234 | 16

#6699844 - Friday 7 October 2016 3:31

And by the way, a kid more than likely does not recover from abuse. They can physically heal, but emotional scars never go away. So, discipline is not the same as abuse.

chinaski7628 | 32

#6699853 - Friday 7 October 2016 4:50

The daughter is 16. Perhaps if she was 6, a spanking would be helpful. At 16, if she's stealing and doing drugs, she's a little beyond a paddling. I think taking away allowance, car, electronic devices, and counseling and/or drug treatment would probably be a more effective way to handle this.

ChristianH39 | 30

#6699865 - Friday 7 October 2016 5:41

I really don't want to get into an argument, but I want to give my 2 cents.

I was beaten as a kid, because I was a headstrong and disobedient kid who had to learn everything the hard way, and I'm still much the same. My parents beat me as a last resort, because very little else got through to me. I'll fully agree that the "I was beaten and I turned out ok" logic is trite and insufficient, but not that it is completely invalid.

The fact is that all kids are different, my beatings served to teach me that there are consequences to my actions. I don't think it's be necessary for every kid to be taught that way, but it got through to me in large part because my parents always gave me an explanation (not just a halfassed justification) why I was being punished. To me that is the difference between abuse and discipline, to make sure a child knows what they did wrong, why it was wrong, and that you didn't hit them because you hate them.

Abuse, to me, is hitting a child because you think it's easier to break them than teach them. Hitting a kid simply because you're angry at something that they did, without trying other methods, isn't discipline.

Stripez234 | 16

#6699875 - Friday 7 October 2016 6:01

You said and portrayed that thought more effectively than I did 66. I completely agree with your comment. Thank you for your insight

DraconicFeline | 31

#6699881 - Friday 7 October 2016 6:12

I was honestly trying to find the words to express how I felt about this topic but you nailed it 66, thank you.

sarcasmismyno1 | 22

#6699882 - Friday 7 October 2016 6:14

I disagree. Spanking can be abuse. It all depends on what the situation actually warrants. The level of physical harm doesn't necessarily correspond to the level of emotional damage.

By fmyinternet | 13

#6699692 - Thursday 6 October 2016 16:45

On the other bright side, you found out your daughter does drugs, and can now help her get stop taking them. So in a way this a good thing for her future

By mnshdw818 | 3

#6699693 - Thursday 6 October 2016 16:45

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

mamasita40 | 13

#6699716 - Thursday 6 October 2016 17:56

#6. You're questioning her parenting skills because her daughter was shoplifting & doing drugs. She was hoping atleast that her daughter had a good reason, like her bday, mothers day etc. She probably was trying to rationalize her actions, til the end. There are no good reasons to steal, but just because a kid does drugs doesn't always mean it's the parents fault. My parents we're amazing to my sister & I but that didn't stop me from doing drugs. It wasn't on my parents, it was on me. So instead of jumping to conclusions, get all your info straight before you say stupid shit.

Catdragon | 40

#6699723 - Thursday 6 October 2016 18:23

There are good reasons to steal. Stealing important info from the enemy, stealing food if you're desperately hungry. But if it's other than food, you have no reason to steal

mnshdw818 | 3

#6699735 - Thursday 6 October 2016 19:12

You're right- I'm questioning her parenting skills. Things do not happen in a bubble. If her daughter has a drug dealer, it's likely this is not simply experimenting with friends. If her daughter is getting arrested for shoplifting she needs to stop making excuses and looking for the bright side and get her daughter some help for her problems. She is headed down a dangerous path that could haunt her for the rest of her life. As a parent, you do everything in your power to help your child. Now that she is aware of the problems, the proper thing to do is take action to fix them.

LyricaSilvan | 29

#6699738 - Thursday 6 October 2016 19:26

Yes, parenting is part of it. But the daughter also has free will and is capable of ignoring the lessons she's been taught. You seem to forget that kids are human beings, and are able to make their own choices. Yes, the mom should try to help her daughter. Yes, she should try to make her daughter understand why these things are bad. But in the end, the mom cannot physically or mentally force her child to do (or not do) anything. The daughter may decide she doesn't care, and clearly has already. If she chooses to continue these actions after her mom has taught her why she shouldn't, there's only so much the mom can do before it's out of her hands.

Bearsmomma | 30

#6699841 - Friday 7 October 2016 3:23

reason or not, it's a crime. My friend and her husband were caught stealing find because they couldn't afford any and needed to feed their kids. They were both arrested and did time for it.