Love: Today, after laying down to sleep, my boyfriend seemed like he...

By hikingtospace - 04/10/2016 15:25 - United States - Hilliard

Today, after laying down to sleep, my boyfriend seemed like he was having trouble trying to say something. After asking what was wrong a couple of times, he said, "I don't want to do this anymore" and got up and left. I had planned on telling him I love him. Saved myself some embarrassment I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 501

You deserved it 929

Love

Dysfunctional

But there's panic on the streets of Carlisle

Pokéman gone

By cahsecuel - 14/08/2014 20:44 - France - Grisolles

Today, I asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. He smiled broadly and said "A porn star!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 531

You deserved it 7 103

By Anonymous - 26/06/2010 00:29 - United States

Today, I was at the store when I saw two extremely hot girls. I walked into their aisle and they looked at me and smiled. I stopped and pretended to look at something so I could listen to what they were saying. They started laughing and walked away. It turned out I was reading a box of tampons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 501

You deserved it 51 515

By Unknown - 23/12/2014 18:25 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, I learned to never invite my father to a wedding. He'll show up late, complain about the food, piss on a tree, and leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 601

You deserved it 3 022

By Modeon123 - 20/10/2016 10:11 - Korea, Republic of - Seoul

Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right inside my mouth. My tongue got stung. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 398

You deserved it 1 150

By Miss_Kristen - 26/02/2012 15:31 - United States

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 356

You deserved it 34 329

No kinkshaming but… what?

By Anonymous - 09/01/2022 22:59

Today, when my new boyfriend told me he had a thigh fetish, I thought it was cute, until I realised our sex life would mostly be him fawning all over my legs, then dry humping my knees. We’ve been together 3 months and I can count the number of actual shags I’ve had on one hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 303

You deserved it 190

By Anonymous - 10/04/2009 14:35 - United States

Today, I was driving my car like any ordinary day. My dad has been harping on me about not checking the oil, so I finally checked it. Driving down the road my hood flew up and shattered my windshield. I forgot to latch my hood after checking the oil. $300 for a new windshield. The oil was fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 270

You deserved it 62 610

By HttpsHaileyy - 15/06/2015 20:02 - United States

Today, I insulted my younger sister's hamster. She then smashed me with a stool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 736

You deserved it 9 563

By WhyTheFNot - 20/06/2009 18:06 - United States

Today, I came home from work and had to pee so badly that I ran to the bathroom and ripped my pants down. My touch screen phone dropped from my pocket and started calling my boyfriend. Since I couldn't quite reach the phone, I left a message of me peeing on his cell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 397

You deserved it 9 280

Scammed

By Anonymous - 13/05/2012 22:00 - Canada - Aldergrove

Today, after a little detective work, I found out the money that recently went missing from my college fund was transferred by my mother, to her own account. She claims it's to pay a parking ticket. Maybe I'm just stupid, but I didn't know they fined people over $3,500 for a parking violation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 320

You deserved it 2 218

By rent-a-cop - 05/05/2013 04:28 - Canada - Toronto

Today, as a condominium security guard, I had to enter an old lady's apartment to supervise the mandatory maintenance taking place inside. I commented on the lakeside view from her window and mentioned, "This is a pretty nice view up here isn't it?" It turns out that she's blind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 717

You deserved it 7 272

Covidiots are why we can't have nice things

By Fakin' It - 18/07/2021 20:01

Today, I finally got an answer as to why I've felt like crap this past week when I tested positive for COVID. My wife, a healthcare professional, is now madly Googling proof that COVID is fake, because she thinks it an elaborate ruse for me to not visit her grandmother next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 179

You deserved it 120

By Anonymous - 09/08/2016 00:04

Today, my 12-year-old sister, who sometimes has difficulty coming up with the right words while speaking, used the word "intercourse" to replace "encounter". She was joking to my dad that she, "had an 'intercourse' with Bob Dylan." I can't get the image out of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 819

You deserved it 1 314

By Iwasjustmovingout - 05/05/2019 00:00

Today, out of the blue, my husband suggested to his parents that they move to our town for the next six months, with the understanding that we’d see them nearly every day. I found out about this when they starting making plans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 869

You deserved it 151

Alone

By Anonymous - 07/11/2019 05:45

Today, I was feeling really down and decided to text a friend to vent to someone about it. Then I realized, I don’t have any friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 970

You deserved it 287

By lonelyengineer - 19/12/2010 10:28 - Germany

Today, I sat in the cafeteria at work and saw a girl, which is a rare sight at my workplace, from the back with a beautifully long ponytail. After a full hour of building up courage to perhaps say hi to her, she turned around. It was a 50-year-old man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 001

You deserved it 32 084

By Hlaalette - 13/05/2015 13:57 - Belgium

Today, I managed to throw my back out by blowing my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 096

You deserved it 3 053

By runescapeftw - 29/12/2009 18:18 - United States

Today, the police called and told me that they had Alex in custody. Apparently, she had public sex with another woman and wants me to come bail her out. Alex is my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 465

You deserved it 2 665

By Carpet cleaner - 21/02/2012 02:15 - Canada

Today, my husband came home late from drinking with his buddies, only to toss and turn and keep me up for an hour. He then sat up and didn't move for a few minutes. I sat up to see what was wrong, only to see him pissing on the carpet beside our bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 980

You deserved it 2 655

Weird flex, but OK

By Anonymous - 10/11/2019 20:00

Today, I asked the girl who has a crush on me if she was autistic. She replied without hesitation, "I can be whatever you want me to be." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 591

You deserved it 1 023

By thank u usa - 13/12/2013 22:20 - Germany

Today, I came across a tourist in the street asking people for directions, but nobody understood him. I speak English, so I went to help the gentleman out. He said "Knock it off with the cheesy accent, pal" and informed me that my country is a shithole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 989

You deserved it 3 548

By ivyleaguebabe - 03/06/2009 21:48 - United States

Today, my sister asked me to help her set up for my niece's birthday party. Being the lazy person that I am, I got my niece to blow up the non-helium balloons. Apparently she's allergic to latex and I'll be the one paying for the hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 732

You deserved it 59 880

FREEDOM

By Idontlikefireworks2 - 07/07/2018 19:00

Today, some idiots set off fireworks close to my house. I was a bit worried, but my uncle assured me it would be fine and left to run an errand. Just minutes later, I looked up to find the tree right next to my wooden balcony engulfed in flames. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 229

You deserved it 252

By prian - 08/03/2010 12:08 - Canada

Today, while playing poker, I lost a stack of money to somebody with the screen name "Poopface." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 522

You deserved it 36 226

By nancie - 02/08/2018 20:30

Today, while I was at work, my husband threw out 50 out of my 70 T-shirts, all of my tank tops, and all but one of my sweaters. I'm not getting them back because they're burning in a bonfire in the backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 770

You deserved it 694

By annoyed - 20/02/2013 20:33 - United States - Paradise Valley

Today, I was so exhausted that I slept through my phone ringing, and later my doorbell ringing. My psycho mom freaked out, and thinking I was in trouble, broke a window to get inside. This all happened before 7am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 118

You deserved it 2 744

By teegtwo - 22/07/2014 05:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend said we can't have sex with the light on anymore. He said he can never finish because the face I make when I orgasm makes him laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 887

You deserved it 26 957

By guh - 31/08/2016 15:54 - Malaysia - Subang Jaya

Today, I heard grunting noises from my brother's room, like when he's having a seizure, so I went in to help. And now I need brain bleach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 658

You deserved it 4 237

By Anonymous - 07/03/2015 19:05 - United States - Brandon

Today, my brother was doing an extremely annoying Shrek impression, so I turned the TV on in a desperate attempt to drown him out. You'll never guess what movie was on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 637

You deserved it 4 637

Gambled and lost

By Anonymous - 25/07/2021 10:59

Today, I found out that my mom found a paper with my long lost username and password to an old crypto wallet with 17 bitcoins. She'd thrown it in the garbage bin before realising what it was. The bin was empty when I went running to check it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 969

You deserved it 219

How nice of them.

By Anonymous - 30/10/2019 22:00

Today, I learned what my office nickname means. My nickname? Butterface. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 692

You deserved it 192

By Married Life 101 - 16/05/2019 02:41

Today, my husband woke up in the middle of the night feeling frisky. He woke me up, got me all hot and ready to go, then before I could get into position he fell back to sleep, leaving me to fend for myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 410

You deserved it 197

Unforgettable

By Edward - 09/12/2021 13:59

Today, I realized that since I was in elementary school, my friends, my workmates, and even my family, all call me accidentally by someone else's name instead of my actual name. I'm 30 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 745

You deserved it 119

By JulietMarie - 10/10/2014 19:12 - United States - Baldwinsville

Today, I got my first compliment in over a year. It was from my gynecologist, saying I have a beautiful cervix. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 015

You deserved it 3 508

By l0stnwundrland - 24/01/2011 08:01 - United States

Today, I went to the eye doctor. For the past three days every time I wear my glasses I become nauseous, get migraines, and have that "fish-eye view" where everything is rounded. Turns out they placed my lenses on the wrong sides. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 749

You deserved it 3 038

By Anonymous - 19/05/2013 04:16 - United States - Great Falls

Today, I lent a pair of expensive headphones to a "friend" for the weekend. As a thank-you, he bought me a soda. He moved this weekend, taking the headphones with him. I lost a $250 pair of headphones for a $1 soda. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 131

You deserved it 21 354

Hiking is so much fun!

By Sacho - 24/10/2019 20:00

Today, 4 miles into a mountain hike with my crush, I suddenly felt a stomach pain, followed by the urge for explosive diarrhea. I had to stand still with my butt clenched to prevent shitting myself. There were no nearby bathrooms, and I didn't have any toilet paper. It was messy. She'll never see me the same. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 729

You deserved it 149

By Jukka - 19/04/2011 00:48

Today, I watched Free Willy with my daughter. Later on she decided to free her 6 pet mice into the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 713

You deserved it 8 426

Housemates from hell

By Anonymous - 15/01/2021 13:58

Today, my housemate saw some stuff in the barn, thought I surely wouldn’t be using it, so he stacked lots of lawn furniture on top. The “stuff” in question? Bales of hay. As in, daily food for my horses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 858

You deserved it 62

By meeeee! - 02/03/2015 13:26 - United States - Wilmington

Today, I fell out of a window while trying to close it so no one would fall out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 466

You deserved it 4 715

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Top comments

almost_there44 26

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Saturday 22 October 2016 15:38

You not only saved yourself from embarrassment, but you also saved yourself from possibly being in a relationship long-term where only one person has feelings. If you would have told him that you love him, he might have stayed just to stay. It's good that he was honest, but it came at a bad time for you. Hope you find someone that feels the same way!

kutkutkut 8

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Saturday 22 October 2016 16:02

I feel sad for you. Too bad love didn't go both ways this time. However better earlier then 10 years in a marriage to find out.

stingray112 24

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Saturday 22 October 2016 15:02

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

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oj101 33

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Saturday 22 October 2016 15:11

Yeah I talk in my sleep quite a lot. Generally, I dream fictional stories, and I talk random shit or say a lot of things like "no, don't do that" according to my roommates. It doesn't really have any connection or meaning to my real life, it's just all quite random.

Mangascribbler 19

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Saturday 22 October 2016 22:15

My boyfriend talks to me about his job in his sleep. He'all start asking me technical questions, what to do about such-and-such, etc. He answers me if I respond, and quiets down if I shush him, but if not he'll hold a one-sided conversation.... it's kind of hilarious.

yerawizardlizzy 27

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Sunday 23 October 2016 13:36

They were both awake and he just had problems trying to find the courage to say it. Not sure how you got anything else out of this.

DanielleinDC 32

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Thursday 27 October 2016 21:49

Given that he was struggling over what to say, finally said he couldn't do this anymore, got up, and left would be a pretty good indicator he wasn't sleeping, much less dreaming, when this happened. So sorry, OP.

StormfrontX33_fml 24

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Saturday 22 October 2016 15:08

It's much better to be in a relationship where the love is reciprocated. Real love is caring about someone enough, that you want the best for them. Sometimes, that includes letting them go.

Earl_KarmasBitch 29

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Saturday 22 October 2016 15:09

You're right about the timing. You would have felt a lot worse if you'd said it and then he dumped you.

cornyrob 33

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Sunday 23 October 2016 6:23

Actually, he's been waiting a long time for you to tell him that you love him. Since you hadn't, he thought you didn't love him after all, so he decided to move on.

almost_there44 26

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Saturday 22 October 2016 15:38

kutkutkut 8

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Saturday 22 October 2016 16:02

I feel sad for you. Too bad love didn't go both ways this time. However better earlier then 10 years in a marriage to find out.

RichardPencil 30

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Saturday 22 October 2016 16:19

You're lucky you found out now. If you stuck with him, he'd have always had the upper hand.

tranced_ 44

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Saturday 22 October 2016 16:47

lucky you dodged a bullet !

Vitani_Verci 24

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Saturday 22 October 2016 17:50

There is nothing wrong with him not loving her back. It was also good of him to be honest with her.

Mynxie 26

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Saturday 22 October 2016 20:31

How did she dodge a bullet? He wasn't obligated to love her back just because she loved him. And he was kind to her by not leading her on anymore.

Sady_Ct 37

Saturday 22 October 2016 17:11

I kind of feel this way in my own relationship, however I don't know how I can approach my partner after 2.5years together about it. Maybe not FYL because he told you before you said something, but FYL because he did it right before sleep time? It's a hard thing to do and you are better off now. I'm assuming you guys don't live together etc so it's easier to resolve the relationship. I feel like a coward for reading this. But I feel lonelier tonight laying next to him than I did while he was away all this week.

mala_19 18

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Saturday 22 October 2016 17:52

Kind of feel like he is breaking upp with you or like you want to break up with him? Either way it is always better to just say the truth, might go a lot better than you think :-) and if you being lonley is one of your problems I'm sure that is something fixable :-)

jbivens1992 17

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Saturday 22 October 2016 18:25

As you said...it saved you from embarrassment. That doesn't mean it didn't hurt...and it may hurt for some time yet. But the important thing is you are no longer wasting that love on someone who doesn't share those feelings as well. In the long run it would hurt hurt worse if it would have continued. He could have used a bit more tact and compassion. when telling you this...but what's done is done. Remember every relationship takes two to make it work, if only you were in it to won it then it never would have gone anywhere. Take some time to heal and then get back out there!