Today, after eighteen years of living with my adoptive parents, I met my biological mum for the first time. She's a forty year old, 300lb American woman who wears 'Twilight' t-shirts and will be spending the rest of her visit to the UK trying to find Robert Pattinson. She says I remind her of herself. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my mom dropped me off at a friend's house. Upon leaving, my friend's mom said how much I looked like my mother. My mother then replied, "That's funny, she was adopted." This was the first I'd heard of this. FML
Today, my mom told me that she had great news: we were going to meet my biological parents. I didn't know I was adopted. FML
Today, I met my biological parents for the first time, 29 years into my life. They turned out to be two of the most pathetic people I have ever met, and the meeting ended after they asked me to lend them money because I "literally owe them my life." FML
Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML
Today, I met this girl who's perfect. Turns out, since I'm adopted, she might be my sister. FML
Today, after years of not speaking with my birth mother, I took a chance and stopped to talk to her when I saw her outside of her house. Five minutes into it, I knew I needed my hair recolored and that I'm out of shape, this all being said by a totally gray haired fat woman. FML
Today, when I was unpacking all of my stuff, my parents declared that they are going to live in Australia, and have found me a 'friend'. I am a 14 year old girl at boarding school, and my friend is my new foster mum. FML
Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. I also found out from her husband that she has her nipples and nether regions pierced. FML
Today, my mother, who is 75 years-old, just told me and my sister that we were adopted. I'm 45 years-old and my sister is 49. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's entire extended family at a party. All of them, including his dad, said I looked exactly like his mum. FML
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Top comments
amrik 11
if I were you I would thank her for putting me up for adoption
nate_msm 0
it's neither op's mum ate it
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Comments (273)
Lady5 0
What makes all of you so much better than Americans? I just dont see it. I am glad I am American and not some smelly Brit with cavity rotted teeth who is just a straight up asshole. I dont know why so many of you are that way. Its ridiculous. The OP had to say her bio mom was American bc she obviously hates Americans, something her adoptive parents probably taught her. It sux that we are such a generous country, even to the assholes who berate us on a daily basis.
Skorne 5
Nice reaction
XxGuard 0
well.. if you like twilight... than... well yeah I bet you guys are a lot alike. Stupid.
shnipe 4
good thing you have real parents... not her
Skorne 5
I wonder who she was stalking when she gave you up for adoption.. Christopher Lee?
zelricthestrong 4
You're just mad she didn't compliment your Ron Weasley sweater
abbeycakes 0
as an American, I'd like to apologize for her and every single person like her. we're not all that way. very sad.
yeptruestory15 0
Why do you need to apologize? I think she has character, and it's nice to see someone that can proudly be themself. As for the OP, you're lucky you got to meet your biological mom.
Pixiex420xstix 1
I like my girlfriend's taco.(;
emariebake 0
they should have a special padded cell ready for them. I'll be sending my mom as well.
Big_halla 0
Mum... Well not everyone in america is fat and lazy.
00ps 0
Welcome to America... hahaha