Today, after almost a week of being bed-ridden with a bad flu, my mom told me it was my job to clean the house. When I told her I still had a fever and didn't feel well, she looked at me and said in an understanding voice "It's okay honey, you can do it slowly." FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I had a horrible case of the flu. I have a fever of 102 degrees and I can't breathe through my nose. Choosing to sleep it off turns out to be enough for my mom to call me a lazy fuck and scream at me for doing nothing all day. FML
Today, after staying in bed all day for a week from sickness, I get up to tell my mom I have terrible back pain and feel extremely dizzy. After curling up on the chair next to her, not being able to keep my head up for too long, she simply stares at me and says, "Can I finish my dinner now?" FML
Today, after spending two days pampering my sick fiancee and her sick son, they were finally feeling better. I woke up feeling rotten and said I needed to rest. She said, "Okay, but I want to deep clean today. Let's go! Out of bed! Up up!" FML
Today, I had my first day off in six months. My mother immediately came down to my room and demanded that I clean the entire house. As I was cleaning, she said, "You don’t get to relax. Ever. Lazy ass." FML
Today, I have the flu. I had to wash the dishes, cook dinner, take out the trash, and take care of the laundry, all while my wife sat around watching TV, because she was "too tired". I work 8 hours a day. She's a college student. She doesn't see what's so unfair about this. FML
Today, I woke up and headed downstairs ready to do the dishes, when my mom hissed at me to, “go do the dishes!” As I was washing them, my mom stood over me the whole time. She eventually said, “You know, it’s pretty fucking sad that I still have to tell you to do these things.” FML
Today, I've been bedridden for 2 weeks. My mother, a very busy woman who lives 30 minutes away, took me to the doctor's office, which is barely 2 minutes across town. Turns out I have strep, and a bad ear infection. My loving boyfriend of 6 years, who lives with me, just told me to take a hot shower and I'd feel better. FML
Today, my mom told me to clean the house up because she wants to make good impression on the cleaning lady. FML
Today, after I sent my daughter to her best friend's house for a week, who lives three hours away, her friend's mom got really sick half way through. My daughter came home early because the mom was too sick. Now my daughter isn't feeling well and I just found the mom has the flu. FML
Today, my mom asked my siblings and me for help cleaning the kitchen. After working for a half hour while all my siblings sat on the couch, I pointed out that I was the only one working. My mom thanked my siblings for not having attitudes like mine and sent me to my room. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
C'mon, slack-ass! You've been a parasite to your family for a week, it's about time you do a little work. She IS allowing it to be done slowly -- that woman is a saint!
GamerGoddess 0
if you've been in bed for a week, ure actually making it worse by staying in bed. you actually have to get up and do stuff if you want to get better - no joke. that doesn't mean scrubbing the floor with a toothbrush, but it's a good idea to walk around, get the mail, do the dishes, sweep the floor.. something light. u have to fight the sickness or you just keep feeling worse
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Comments (128)
amerwin 3
haha.. she gave you a week to heal. I would have given you three days at most before making you resume helpful activities. ydi for not having superior genetics.
Anti_Sora 31
Look I might be giving her sympathy for having something that left me bed ridden for a month that wasn't even a sickness or an injury but 3 days?! I have tried to get out of bed when I was bed ridden and I puked my guts out before I got on my feet. So don't just day that you only have 3 days to heal when most people have been in bed before for longer.
yourmurderscenex 13
wahhh.
Reynaaa 0
shez a bitch ! I woulda slapped her !
kiraaamaeee 0
cough on her food :))
FFML_314 12
OK, OP should start in the kitchen first. She should get it nice and clean and when she gets done sweeping the floor, she's going to mop and then put a nice thin streak of oil down. She's going to call her mother in the kitchen to come look at the wonderful job she did, when her mom walks in, BAM! She falls and breaks her hip. Better?
FFML_314 12
Extreme? DAMN! I was going for subtle too. It's a good thing I didn't suggest the one that involves the knives. *Looks around aimlessly*
ohthebloodygore 16
I like the knives suggestion better!
keepsmiling1996 5
sounds like my mom
ramencrusade 0
how short are you? if it hit you square in the jaw, that guy must of ******' helicoptered her off the ground..
ramencrusade 0
aw shiet wrong fml my bad..o well I would of just laid in bed and slept.
aardvarkish 17
At first I thought my iPhone suddenly got gremlins.
Erindub 0
It'd probably be good for you to get outta bed for a little while sugar. Tough it up
SettoFail 9
that sucks. sounds like something my mom would do.
lucidlucia 0
Mom still has to take care of your lazy ass when she's sick. I bet you don't even care or notice when she's sick. You need to grow up! Get off your lazy butt and clean house.
klutzycleo 5
So true!!
ccook85 0
Suck it up! A little flu never hurt anyone.
Schizomaniac 24
It hurt people with AIDS.
strikeeagle 3
lol 51
mattman1994 0
touché
Gameguy602 0
What about the people it killed (I might have my times wrong) around world war 2? It was named influenza by the French because they thought it was the influence of the god's or something, as a punishment for killing so many people in the war.