Love: Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

By Anonymous - 01/03/2010 22:04 - United States

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 748

You deserved it 10 949

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Same thing different taste

By sydneybourgeois - 13/08/2011 04:06 - United States

Today, the guy of my dreams told me he liked me and leaned in to kiss me. Just as our lips touched, I ripped a big ass fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 538

You deserved it 16 160

By anonymous - 15/01/2012 05:58 - United States

Today, my crush grabbed my butt while I was walking up the stairs. In surprise I farted. He won't even look me in the eyes now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 591

You deserved it 7 684

Chemical warfare

By Anonymous - 12/07/2024 21:00 - Canada - Terrace

Today, while sitting on the couch with my husband, I farted quietly. Not a big deal, except it's hot out and our fan was blowing in his face, and it stunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 158

You deserved it 443

By ECullen - 21/05/2009 19:13 - United States

Today, I was talking to this guy that I like a lot and I think he likes me back. When he told me I was beautiful I laughed so hard that I farted. Loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 747

You deserved it 24 985

By byebyeromance - 26/08/2014 01:03 - United States - State College

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 341

You deserved it 5 080

By couldntholdit - 12/07/2011 17:09 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with a guy that I really like. When he gave me a hug goodbye, he slid his hand into the back pocket of my jeans. It was glorious until I farted on his hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 387

You deserved it 23 974

An attempt was made

By bubblewrap - 20/10/2015 10:13 - United Kingdom - Swindon

Today, I noticed a guy checking out my ass in the mirror behind the bar where I work. He was cute, so I thought I'd put on a little show. I bent over to reach for something near the floor, which caused me to let rip a series of uncontrollable farts, like popping bubble wrap. He quickly left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 818

You deserved it 11 984

By Stinky and Single - 06/08/2015 23:14 - United States

Today, I was sitting in a secluded corner of a coffee shop and felt extremely gassy. Thinking I'd be safe, I let out a pretty nasty smelling fart. Next thing I know, a cute guy is approaching me and asked my name, but all it took was for him to inhale once and he bolted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 783

You deserved it 6 716

By john - 28/01/2009 23:02 - United States

Today, the girl who I have had a crush on for two years snuck up from behind me and gave me a hug. I farted very loud at the same exact time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 856

You deserved it 5 157

By Wowsers. - 30/01/2010 08:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 818

You deserved it 36 020

JackRocksSoSuckI 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 1:01

lol haha that's funny

bustyboi 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 1:03

that blows!

Comments

wrestlerbeast 0

Friday 5 March 2010 23:34

awww danget: I just gotta imagine I'm saying. c-d cup?

jpest17 5

Saturday 6 March 2010 3:14

I wish I was ugly so I could become invissible.

wrestlerbeast 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 16:50

what makes u think i'm excited? *whisitles nervously*

trackrunner00008 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 19:30

ay girl if your ass is that hot, don't even worry bout it

HaLf_bAkEd 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 20:51

lol

wrestlerbeast 0

Sunday 7 March 2010 1:54

I wasn't. haha

Ruscio 0

Sunday 7 March 2010 2:44

lmao

wrestlerbeast 0

Sunday 7 March 2010 3:44

haha I'm not as weird as I seem. I'm mostly normal haha

wrestlerbeast 0

Sunday 7 March 2010 7:00

haha well that's good then

wrestlerbeast 0

Sunday 7 March 2010 7:47

haha yeah so what time is it where u live

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Today, my manager said it was my choice to have surgery on my arm and that I shouldn't complain, everyone goes through pain. She's right, but I was born with a birth defect in my wrist. The surgery was going to happen sooner or later, I didn't want to be born this way. FML

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You deserved it 86

Today, my boyfriend is mad at me for causing him to fail a science test. Apparently he thought I was serious when I told him that homo sapiens were extinct because they were "homo". FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 329

You deserved it 3 966

Today, my mother complained all day while I'm trying to work from home. I started getting chest pains from the stress of everything having to be perfect or she has one of her meltdowns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 023

You deserved it 122

Today, a friend pointed out to me that my girlfriend of five years looks a bit like my mom. She does, and now I can't get it out of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 906

You deserved it 1 228

Today, after frolicking in some long grass near a lake, my dog got back in the car smelling strongly of poop. Upon further investigation, I discovered that a sewer had overflowed in the area. My dog rolled around in human faeces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 005

You deserved it 342

Today, I was caller number nine on the radio, meaning I technically won the contest. I was too awkward, so they hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 770

You deserved it 4 657

Same thing different taste

Chemical warfare

An attempt was made

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