Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML
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Today, some punk got up in my face yelling at me, pushed my wife and scratched my car with a, "What you gonna do, old man?" attitude, and yet I’m the bad guy who gets arrested because I open-palm slapped him and he fell into a glass window and fucked up his face and neck, probably permanently. FML
Today, I finally had it with the redneck bully who's been tormenting me. He was repeatedly poking and pinching me and laughing out loud during class, so I slung him to the ground, pinning him. I got suspended. They only called his parents, who never do anything; my "caring" parents are looking into teen boot camp. FML
Today, some punk tried the "flaming bag of dog poop" trick on me. I caught him in the act and smashed the unlit bag across his face. Now he's "traumatized" and wants to press charges. FML
Today, some guy punched me so hard I lost a tooth. I defended myself and broke his nose, so he started screaming for his mother. He turned out to be autistic, so witnesses, including the police, said I should have been more understanding of his disability after HE HIT ME AND TOOK MY FUCKING TOOTH OUT. FML
Today, some guy tried to mug me. Shocked, I threw a punch that somehow knocked him on his ass. I'm now staring down the barrel of a lawsuit since he was apparently only 16 and "acting out" because of his shitty home life, as if I should have just handed him my wallet politely. FML
Today, I encountered a madman who threw a bottle at me and hurt me. In a fit of rage, I beat him up, and as a result I was taken to the police station, and ordered to pay compensation for everything. FML
Today, I was put in lockup for accidentally scaring the officer by lifting my hand to scratch my head. FML
Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML
Today, someone punched me in the back of the head, so I swung round and broke their nose. It was some woman screaming at me for wearing headphones and ignoring her. She then pulled a hidden disability badge out her pocket so everyone thought I was beating up a disabled person. FML
Today, as I was driving to work, I witnessed a kid apparently getting jumped. Being a good citizen, I got out and started yelling at them. I ended up alongside the kid in the hospital. FML
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Top comments
NitroTonicsFML 4
Karma will him someday.
xMafia 0
OMG. That punk deserved more than just a punch in the face. What a lowlife. Don't worry, he'll get his retribution.
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Comments (306)
DanielleCubealo 0
I'm so sorry that happened to you, OP. But you should know never to hit someone, even out of anger. I know that college-kid was being a prick and deserved that punch to the face, but punching someone can, will, and did get you into trouble. It was very noble of you to stand up for your kid, but there could've been an alternative to straighten that ****** out without getting into trouble. But you have a strong heart. Just don't do it again if something like that happens again, or else your kid might think it's okay to hit someone.
fmlloljk 0
well, shouldn't have punched him, idiot.
chriskiss 2
if your in jail how the **** did you put this on FML let alone type it on ur phone if your handcuffed?
supahnazi 0
op, u did the rite thing
LexSpades 4
you should teach your son to punch people who make fun of him so they go to jail when they hit him back for assault on a handicapped person.
Jabs_Innit 0
Everyone who said that the OP shouldn't have punched him should man up and grow a pair. Who is the real demon here, the college student who is making fun of the mentally handicapped, or the father who is defending his child's honour?
Snowlight_fml 7
I find it a perfect example
RMC000 7
I'd have kicked his ass too... there's some things you just don't joke about.
primitivx 0
You can't hit people just because you don't like what they are saying. You deserved to be arrested psycho.
brandddi69 0
I'm sorry. he deserved more than that punch. thank you for standing up for your son. a lot of people are too scared.