Today, a few friends and I ran through sprinklers at our school until we were all soaked. Then we were told that they put fertilizer in the water. I'm soaked in manure. Now I know why it tasted weird. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized why "Stay off the grass" signs were all over campus. I cut through the grass on my way to my next class and tripped over a sprinkler head, breaking it off and soaking myself in muddy water. I had to sit through a 4-hour lecture with wet, muddy clothes. FML
Today, I was lying in a lawn chair next to my wooden fence when a yellow liquid started spraying me. The neighbor's douchebag son was peeing through the small hole in the fence and soaked me. FML
Today, I arrived at work early. I noticed the plants on the side of my classroom could use some water so I went out to do so. On the way, I found a beer can. Not wanting the kids to see it, I picked it up but some spilled on my dress. I quickly noticed a familiar smell. No, not beer. Urine. FML
Today, I was at soccer practice. The ground's keeper just aerated the field, and my teammates and I decided to throw the cylindrical clumps of dirt at each other. I got hit in the face with one. It wasn't dirt. It was a clump of wet dog poop. FML
Today, I was hanging with my friends when out of the blue, I got thirsty. Friends said there was Gatorade in the fridge. Being the trusting person I am, I took a drink, only to discover it was piss. FML
Today, as I was walking to wash my hands after using the restroom, the guy walking away from the sink flicked water from his hands towards the floor. Water splashed all over my beige shorts. I had to walk back into class looking like I'd peed my pants. FML
Today, at a party, my three friends and I thought it would be fun to urinate in a jug. We dislike the neighbours, so decided to throw the contents of the jug over the fence into their garden. It hit a tree and splashed back. I ended up covered in our piss. FML
Today, I noticed that my sweat smelled like cat food. FML
Today, I was at a music festival, watching one of my favorite bands. The security guys were throwing water into the crowd to cool us down. I saw some about to be thrown by another fan, so I stood with my mouth open to catch some of it. I ended up with a face full of hot piss. FML
Today, I was at assembly in school. My friend had a water bottle. It was a squirt bottle, and he squirted me, over and over. I got ticked off, so I took it away from him, but when I took the bottle I squeezed it and it squirted all over the people in front of me. The principal saw, and I got in trouble. FML
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Top comments
littlemissdqgirl 8
that's just gross
JesseJaymz 0
no slow motion baywatch run for yall
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Comments (150)
protooler31 0
OP: Fertilizer doesn't necessarily equal manure, since that's rather difficult to dissolve completely in water. More than likely it's a non-toxic chemical fertilizer. Take a shower anyways, though.
kcccozzie 0
ahhh hahah that's awesome.
sadieemfc 2
YDI for being an idiot. not all fertalizer is shit.
Moemoemoe_fml 0
Diluted in the water, it's not going to be manure. It's a chemical fertilizer. Meaning you didn't drink shit, you drank something potentially toxic, whee...
mammajamma12 0
wow,that sound like something that would happen to me and my friends.
LilaBear 2
Fertiliser is not always made from manure. Seeing as this one was diluted in water, I'd suggest it's a chemical rather than manure.
gunnar7240 0
Fertilizer doesn't have to be crap.
yawndiver 2
office staff - "shouldn't we go tell them?" "Just give it a minute."
Stylin_Since_97 10
Are you sure it wasn't cafeteria food? At my school the two taste the same
Iheardthat 7
Dude, if you've ever been in the lake you've been soaked in 25%manure. Get over it