Miscellaneous: Today, I wore an expensive vintage blazer which I'd purchased... - FML

Nearly

28/09/2021 01:05

Today, I found out my dog of 11 years has very severe cancer. Her spleen, which has swollen to the size of a football, had a small rupture a day ago and would fatally within a week, we'll be putting her down tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45

You deserved it 3

27/09/2021 06:27

Today, I have to get up and go to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55

You deserved it 100

Spicy

Spicy

Unfriended

By thethrowawayplace - 15/10/2021 17:00

Spicy

Today, my friend was watching a black guy getting yelled at by the cops on TV. He then decided to yell, "Wow, ni***** really don't know how to behave!" When I didn't react, he yelled it over and over, until I slunk into my room. He knows I'm part black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 610

You deserved it 100

Grind mindset

By MyStomachHurts - 15/10/2021 05:00

Spicy

Today, my boss wrote me up for taking too many bathroom breaks. I tried calling in sick with a bad case of indigestion, but he told me to just power through it because, "it can't possibly be that bad." I have been in severe, persistent discomfort the whole damn day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 40

28/08/2012 00:10

Today, I wore an expensive vintage blazer which I'd purchased at a market in Paris. Turns out my colleague has the exact same one, only hers is from a clearance rack at Target. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 619

You deserved it 8 783

Own it

In the zone

That took a dark turn…

31/10/2015 05:10

Today, I finally got a promotion at work. Today I also found out that no matter how long I work, no matter how much effort and unpaid overtime I put in for 6 years, my coworkers will be convinced I only got promoted because I'm the CFO's son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 116

You deserved it 2 612

06/11/2014 20:15

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 722

You deserved it 7 784

18/01/2015 03:45

Today, I saw a little old lady trying to cross the street. I went over and tried to help her. Turned out she was actually just a really short young woman. As soon as I took her arm, she screamed in front of everyone and accused me of trying to molest her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 266

You deserved it 8 438

09/03/2013 06:16

Today, my boyfriend left me for a girl I know. She was the girl my last boyfriend left me for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 773

You deserved it 3 774

08/09/2009 06:22

Today, I went on a blind double date. My date was drunk before I got there. He kept getting my name wrong, and ended up spilling a glass of red wine down the front of my dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 445

You deserved it 5 193

All in the family

By notasgood - 12/01/2010 23:54

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend dumped me so he could sleep with my mom without feeling guilty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 399

You deserved it 3 318

03/12/2011 01:35

Today, my husband and I went to my overbearing mom's 57th birthday party. He opened his gift in front of her and said smugly, "The makeup's for your face, and the prayer book's for the fat rolls." Any hope of family peace is now lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 851

You deserved it 3 728

31/08/2009 16:45

Today, my friend got a babysitter for the kids and told me she was taking me to a party. My son told me his band was playing at a party. I will be 40 tomorrow, so I thought this would be the best surprise birthday party ever. It WAS a surprise birthday party – for a friend of ours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 939

You deserved it 3 508

15/10/2012 21:38

Today, I fell down the stairs. Lying on my back in extreme pain, I called my mom for help. When she came over, she said I looked like a dead bug, took a picture and posted it on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 016

You deserved it 2 412

Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

By Anonymous - 06/09/2019 20:03

Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 398

You deserved it 157

11/08/2019 02:00

Today, I finally confronted my daughter about never using air freshener after she poops. She said, "But I thought flushing made the smell go away!" She's 15 and she actually believed this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 281

You deserved it 560

31/07/2014 05:00

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 012

You deserved it 5 090

Through the wall

By Jeynna - 08/05/2021 00:01

Today, I bumped into my next door neighbor. She said, "Not for nothing, but I heard you fighting with your boyfriend last night, you're pretty harsh on him." I don't have a boyfriend, I was just drunk and castigating myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 473

You deserved it 722

29/06/2009 21:52

Today, I left on a 2 month trip. I was in a hurry to pack so I wouldn't miss my plane. There were 2 piles of clothes on my bed. One pile was clothes that didn't fit to take to a thrift store, one was to take with me. Guess which one I brought? FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 570

You deserved it 58 156

Knock off

By mee - 24/11/2020 08:02

Today, I overheard my six year-old step-son playing with his sister and cousin. His sister was the baby, cousin the step-dad, and he got to be “the best one” because he was the "real dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 727

You deserved it 101

Ace of Spades

By Simon Edhouse - 13/09/2021 09:00

Spicy

Today, my wife has initiated sex less than five times in the 18 years we've been married. If I don't mention it, then she doesn't have to bother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 900

You deserved it 180

20/06/2015 01:06

Today, I decided to do naked yoga in my lounge room, as I always do. Later, I found a note on my front door saying "Keep doing what you're doing". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 953

You deserved it 9 158

17/03/2010 04:18

Today, I found out that I will be spending my spring break alone because my family is going to France. I can't go with them nor go with any of my friends because I have to take care of the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 588

You deserved it 4 125

12/09/2010 00:39

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months broke up with me because he felt "our religious differences kept us apart." We've never talked about anything religious. Ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 177

You deserved it 3 674

27/06/2013 23:15

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 234

You deserved it 3 316

06/03/2009 21:24

Today, I went for a job interview on my birthday. I had on a shirt and a tie on and I had my Blackberry in my pocket. I was running a little late, so I dashed outside. When I came out of the door, a bunch of my buddies screamed HAPPY BIRTHDAY! and poured Gatorade all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 682

You deserved it 3 684

01/12/2009 07:05

Today, I heard my cat climbing on the counters in the kitchen. To prevent a tremendous avalanche of dishes, I picked up the cat and put it outside. She got scared from the blinds and scurried away leaving deep scratches across my nipple. I wasn't wearing a shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 111

You deserved it 16 572

That's… a crime?

By Anonymous - 04/03/2021 05:01

Today, I finally told my boyfriend that I see a therapist every week because, amongst other things, I'm terrified of being locked in a room. He didn't believe me, so he locked me in the bathroom "for a laugh." I had a panic attack and passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 631

You deserved it 107

26/12/2015 05:40

Today, I walked in on my 13-year-old sister cutting her pubic hair with scissors. After a long talk about what on earth she was doing, she confessed to doing it so her boyfriend could find her clitoris. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 523

You deserved it 2 454

The Dictator

By anonymous - 18/01/2012 05:06

Today, I discovered that my new landlords must meet and approve guests of mine before they come over, and guests are not allowed when they aren't home or past 11pm. I'm 25 years old and just moved out of my parents' home to get away from my controlling mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 058

You deserved it 4 096

13/10/2009 11:07

Today, my new girlfriend told me I don't snore when I sleep. Which is funny, since during the last year of my marriage, my ex-wife would make me sleep on the couch because my loud snoring kept her up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 401

You deserved it 2 949

25/10/2016 02:58

Today, like most days, my cat tried to wake me up with a gentle, fluffy paw pat on my nose. This morning, however, he managed to get his claw caught inside my nostril. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 479

You deserved it 863

22/06/2010 23:44

Today, I found out that my younger sister had maxed out all three of my credit cards when I tried all three of the cards, and realized that I didn't have $5.29 to buy tampons and Advil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 915

You deserved it 5 295

Great time to try for a kid

By Anonymous - 04/07/2020 14:01

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years complained about having to jack off for IVF. We haven't had sex in 9 months, I have to take hormone injections, and I'm jealous of his own hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 379

You deserved it 316

29/03/2018 19:00

Today, after a week on bed rest in a cast after ankle surgery, I got so bored and lonely I agreed to do an hour-long government phone survey just to have someone to talk to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 728

You deserved it 372

23/04/2011 20:54

Today, I asked a coworker if she would cover for me on Easter because I want to spend it with my 3 year old daughter. She said no because she wants to spend Easter with her kids, too. She doesn't have kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 232

You deserved it 7 118

11/10/2011 11:52

Today, I realized that the redneck, hick, abusive family that my co-workers always joke about is my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 385

You deserved it 3 955

Take your time

By Kitty - 08/08/2021 09:59

Today, thinking I could carry it all, I stubbornly brought a load of food in with both hands. The glass jar of nacho cheese smashed on my radiator, and I had to use a toothbrush to clean between the cracks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 286

You deserved it 736

31/03/2010 04:44

Spicy

Today, I took pills to make sure I lasted longer with my girlfriend. Good news? It worked fine and is still working now. Bad news? We've been done for a good two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 135

You deserved it 33 003

09/05/2013 07:35

Today, I was laid off from my job as a manager. After cleaning out my office, I began clearing my computer. I received an email from HR announcing a job position that opened up. Too bad it was for my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 204

You deserved it 3 771

06/11/2012 18:29

Today, I started my new job as the only IT tech for my office. My first task: untangling the hundred mice the previous tech tied together for "fun". FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 778

You deserved it 1 773

24/08/2011 08:03

Today, my aunt and uncle stole $584 from me, since I'm moving out. Their reasoning? I stole things. When I asked what I'd stolen, my aunt looked me straight in the eye and said "Milk Duds." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 335

You deserved it 3 282

More proof the system is broken

By Anonymous - 27/06/2020 20:04

Today, my younger sister, who lives at home and worked 1 day a week at the gym, got her unemployment card. I work at a hospital, on the frontlines, with COVID-19 patients. I don't get hazard pay. She now makes more than me in a week by sitting at home watching Netflix, while I risk my life every day to help people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 364

You deserved it 178

Wait, what?

By The Bosnian - 15/10/2020 02:02

Today, after I applied and interviewed for a technical position in IT two weeks ago, they informed me that I didn't get it, because I'm "too technical." How the hell is that even possible? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 190

You deserved it 79

04/06/2015 12:26

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend I was horny and was waiting for him at my place. 30 minutes later, he still hadn't arrived, so I called him and asked if he was coming. He replied "Already did, right into a kleenex." and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 380

You deserved it 4 381

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:26

Man I hate coincidences...

syki 22

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:27

C'est la vie.

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:26

Man I hate coincidences...

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 12:11

I hate when other people get better deals than I do. Pisses me off.

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Wednesday 29 August 2012 7:58

I hate when the clothing I buy ends up being on sale a couple days later.

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:27

You could resell it on an online vintage marketplace, like ASOS. People go for that stuff~

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:27

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.. Show it anyway

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 11:10

I think OP is saying that the seller from the market bought a bunch of cheap Target blazers, then sold them as "vintage" items for a higher price.

sexyaniknowit 7

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 12:08

"the same exact one" - quoted by the OP :)

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 19:55

Maybe it's the same designer at target making the same blazer for 40 years.

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 21:33

It could also be that the target one is a knock off.

syki 22

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:27

C'est la vie.

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:28

Oh man that sucks, got ripped off hard

FaraPjJammaz 13

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Sunday 7 October 2012 0:00

I love your icon haha

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:29

I guess there are advantages to being a cheapskate like me who never buys expensive vintage anything ^^

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:30

Hey at least now you know we're to get cheaper blazers?unfortunately Countries make millions of dollars off of tourists

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:37

Where*

BunchieRules 31

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Wednesday 29 August 2012 1:42

9 - Technically, 8's comment would still work. "At least you know we are to get cheaper blazers." It's just not what 8 meant.

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Wednesday 29 August 2012 23:51

Autocorrect-.-

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:40

Technically yours is original and vintage and hers is most likely a fake. Yours is better, OP. (:

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 11:19

You don't know if her blazer is really original and vintage... It's not the first time I saw shops selling 'vintage' items which I bought on eBay for some dollars. But congrats on your colleague for not wasting shitloads of money on clothes.

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:44

If you pronounce (tär gae) then it does not sound like it is cheep

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 9:49

Thats why you always buy shirts that say "I went to Paris and all I got was this t-shirt" At least people will know you got your shirt from Paris.