Today, I had sex with this guy I had been crushing on for five years. It took longer to put my clothes back on than he lasted. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML
Today, I finally had sex with a coworker I’d been flirting with for nearly 2 and half years. The sex lasted less than 2 and a half minutes. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I'd had a crush on for a long time. When I asked if he was having trouble putting it in, he answered that he was fully in. FML
Today, I had sex for the first time in months. His apology took longer than the sex did. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for years. There was just one problem: it was so terrible I said, "I think I might be straight" about five minutes in just so it would stop. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been flirting with for months. Immediately after, he gave me the "let's just be friends" speech then left for work, accidentally locking me in his apartment. I had to call his ex-girlfriend to come let me out. She smirked. FML
Today, I finally had the chance to have sex with my crush. Too bad I couldn't get an erection. FML
Today, I had a date with a guy I've had a crush on for 6 years. Things got heated when we got back to his place, but he had trouble getting the condom on. As soon he got it on, he came. I told him it was OK, I'd help him get hard again. He said, "No thanks. I'm good." FML
Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Welshite 40
Relationships are built on more than sex. You might need to reevaluate your attraction to him.
Andurrr 3
I'm not sure if he lasted for a couple of seconds, or if you wear an astronaut suit every day.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (186)
patrickalamo 48
Nerves reload and try again.
the_true_batman 10
It's worse for him. It's hard to be confident about the next time when you ****** up the last time, and then your anxiety ruins the second time, and now you're really ******* scared of the third time, and eventually you just stop dating to avoid embarrassment.
Austyn57 1
poor guy
goodgood_fml 5
Awww. Is this the part where he falls madly in love and you refuse to take his calls?? Please do not throw him back in the pool without telling him. Otherwise, some poor woman is going to end up very very angry. Thumb me down, but my orgasms are important!!
CharresBarkrey 16
Your comment makes absolutely no sense. It's like reading lines taken out of completely different thoughts/conversations that have been put together to form one cluster-**** of a paragraph.
vbmg152 19
I keep saying this... The fantasy is always better than reality! No one can live up to whatever you had in your mind!! Also, some guys, especially young ones, have to be taught!!
whatthefreshhell 15
maybe he had a crush on you too and was just too excited. it happens.
greatfirstdate 18
So what? Maybe he was just excited as well. My boyfriend lasted like 20 seconds the first time, but now he can last half an hour if he tries. Don't be so hard on him.
Cainicide 5
So, he doesn't sleep around much. That's a bad thing? Bang him every day, and he'll bang you longer each day (in theory).
Karalela44 15
Must've been a virgin
aly01234567 5
That's why you save sex for marriage
CharresBarkrey 16
That's why you find out BEFORE marriage that he can't last long enough to satisfy you. Can you imagine marrying someone and finding out they don't measure up to your needs?
Cainicide 5
^ That's retarded logic. And I'm sure you're some magical pleasure machine yourself. Give me a break. People improve. That's how I became the magical pleasure machine I am today. Source: Doesn't matter had sex