Today, I had sex with this guy I had been crushing on for five years. It took longer to put my clothes back on than he lasted. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML
Today, I finally had sex with a coworker I’d been flirting with for nearly 2 and half years. The sex lasted less than 2 and a half minutes. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I'd had a crush on for a long time. When I asked if he was having trouble putting it in, he answered that he was fully in. FML
Today, I had sex for the first time in months. His apology took longer than the sex did. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for years. There was just one problem: it was so terrible I said, "I think I might be straight" about five minutes in just so it would stop. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been flirting with for months. Immediately after, he gave me the "let's just be friends" speech then left for work, accidentally locking me in his apartment. I had to call his ex-girlfriend to come let me out. She smirked. FML
Today, I finally had the chance to have sex with my crush. Too bad I couldn't get an erection. FML
Today, I had a date with a guy I've had a crush on for 6 years. Things got heated when we got back to his place, but he had trouble getting the condom on. As soon he got it on, he came. I told him it was OK, I'd help him get hard again. He said, "No thanks. I'm good." FML
Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Relationships are built on more than sex. You might need to reevaluate your attraction to him.
Andurrr 3
I'm not sure if he lasted for a couple of seconds, or if you wear an astronaut suit every day.
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Comments (186)
ImYoursAlways 3
It was probably the best thirty seconds of his life.
dangousity 21
Haha sucks for you!!
Metthew 15
That's too bad, put perhaps you should give him a second (or more) chances - if he's had a long brake, he might not be good at lasting really long.
pdp_fml 21
Well, you should have tried a second time. It takes longer when you do it a second time.
lostmongoose 23
So you crushed for 5 years then are disappointed when jumping straight in the sack isn't amazing? I'm gonna skip all the maybe he isn't a man ***** and was also really into you. What about the whole middle relationship part? The sexual build? The learning how to actually please each other? You kinda set yourself up for this one.
secretbagofstuff 4
Maybe you just take really long to get dressed?...
Chinman05 4
Wow no morals or values anymore let's just all sleep with everyone! ;)
_wraith 15
Hey, if she's single and he's single... than what's the problem?
bcan 3
Give the guy another chance. I'll be honest, the same thing happened the first time with me and my wife. Never happened to me before and hasn't happened since. He was probably just as excited and nervous as you were.
kneecoalparis 3
Ohmygod, been there
noisebox 1
Did he come in through the back door?