Today, I had sex with this guy I had been crushing on for five years. It took longer to put my clothes back on than he lasted. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML
Today, I finally had sex with a coworker I’d been flirting with for nearly 2 and half years. The sex lasted less than 2 and a half minutes. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I'd had a crush on for a long time. When I asked if he was having trouble putting it in, he answered that he was fully in. FML
Today, I had sex for the first time in months. His apology took longer than the sex did. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for years. There was just one problem: it was so terrible I said, "I think I might be straight" about five minutes in just so it would stop. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been flirting with for months. Immediately after, he gave me the "let's just be friends" speech then left for work, accidentally locking me in his apartment. I had to call his ex-girlfriend to come let me out. She smirked. FML
Today, I finally had the chance to have sex with my crush. Too bad I couldn't get an erection. FML
Today, I had a date with a guy I've had a crush on for 6 years. Things got heated when we got back to his place, but he had trouble getting the condom on. As soon he got it on, he came. I told him it was OK, I'd help him get hard again. He said, "No thanks. I'm good." FML
Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Relationships are built on more than sex. You might need to reevaluate your attraction to him.
Andurrr 3
I'm not sure if he lasted for a couple of seconds, or if you wear an astronaut suit every day.
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Comments (186)
brent0007 2
According to a course about sex I took in university, anything longer than 30 seconds is sheer willpower. We are designed to get as many women pregnant as possible. You should take it as a compliment it means your not fugly.
then000bster 16
Who takes an entire college course on sex? Since it was a class you can guarantee there wasn't any hands-on experience.
Epikouros 32
I think you're confusing humans with bonobos.
Dontbelikeme 2
Hahahahahahah FUGLY hahahahahahaha
BubbleGrunge 18
Gentlemen always remember foreplay!
Gremlinswife 13
Maybe he has been equally crushing on you OP and the intensity of finally getting what he wanted was too overwhelming for him. I would take it as a compliment :)
traveler_ghost 12
doesn't matter had sex? *runs for cover
SkoomaKi 28
You better run, I have an arsenal of "not original" comments on standby.
klovemachine 24
Thank you, 20 :) I'm glad somebody said it
cocoskitty 3
If he's a teen, that's no surprise. Teen guys are all like that. They get better as they get older
trippythehippy 6
Although it sucks for you, keep in mind 2 things. 1 if its been a while for him or 2 you just had him over worked, either of these could attribute Pme. But it does repost the question. Why do they say men suffer from Pme? He got what he wanted. As most women can attest. It's WOMEN who actually suffer from Pme.
MR_RODSQUAD 11
He must have lasted a couple of hours then.
SkoomaKi 28
Well, damn OP. You are just too good for him. I mean the guy should be able to last 20 minutes at least, right? Oh and did I mention he should know how to give multiple orgasms too? It looks like he can't improve or do anything about it. Shame.
mikeymayhem_87 15
Another reason they're called crushes... Your expectations or hopes sometimes get crushed! Sorry OP!
ICastillo 25
Poor guy was a one pump chump.