By mommy - 18/04/2014 02:31 - United States - North Andover
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Damn, OP. This really sucks! That's not cool that your ex and his girlfriend are having the kids call her that especially if their relationship is still so new.
My dad's fiancée keeps calling me and my little sister HER kids and spreads rumors about my mom being a whore. We are still beyond pissed. OP, don't let your ex's new wife call your children hers. Tell her who the real momma is and put her in her rightful place!
It seems like your kids know more about her than they know about you.
@23 When do kids ever do what they're told? ESPECIALLY about something like this. Chances are very high they're calling her Mom by choice, or because the OP is acting 'unMomlike' towards them and they're pissed. I also have to wonder how 'new' is new. I've known a lot of couples where an ex will act like a new spouse is an interloper even if they've been together for a LONG time.
I'm aware of that, but when it comes to things like, "You must call this woman I have just started dating Mom," etc, it seems unlikely they would call her Mom WITHOUT HESITATION to their own mother if it's something they're being forced to do. I could see them saying, "Oh... that's uh... that's Mom..." if their father/the girlfriend insist on the moniker, or just saying, "That's dad's new girlfriend," if the father/girlfriend aren't in earshot. Well raised kids do do as they're told the majority of the time, but it's very difficult to make them do it all the time, especially when it comes to things like this, is all I'm saying.
@60, It's been a well-known issue that kids and even adults follow what authorities tell them to do no matter how strange or unethical it seems as seen in the Milgram experiment. In this situation though if the father did tell them to call his girlfriend "Mom," the kids are either placing their trust in their father and obeying what he tells them to do or they're being reinforced in some way to do it. It's not as unlikely as you make it seem.
Honestly it sounds to me like the children are young and it was a mistake. Children can get confused during break ups and it is possible for people to accidentally be called something else - how many people have called their teacher 'mum' by accident? If the kids really are calling the new girlfriend mum though, FYL OP... That's not a good feeling
60-- it really depends on how old the kids are. Young kids (8 or younger) tend to be very desperate and eager to please adults and parents-- hence the need to teach young children things like 'stranger danger'. It's also possible the girlfriend asked them to call her mom.