Today, I stood up too quickly and got dizzy, so I sat on the edge of the bed to regain my balance. I started dozing off to sleep again, got confused, and peed down the side of my bed thinking I was on the toilet. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I had a dream I was going the bathroom. I then woke up peeing, but I didn’t wet the bed yet. As I ran to the bathroom while half asleep and in the dark, I rammed into the wall. On my way back to bed, I tripped and accidentally slapped my fiancé in an effort to stop myself from falling over. FML
Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML
Today, I woke up because I really had to pee. I got out of bed, went to the bathroom and went back to bed. Or so I thought. I did pee, but I only dreamed that I got out of bed. FML
Today, I woke up desperately needing to pee. I sat up in bed, naked, and tried to decide if I should get dressed, or run for it and hope no one saw me. I guess I took too long to decide, because as soon as I stood up to run, I pissed on the floor. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML
Today, I woke up on the floor with my feet still in the bed. I had passed out while vomiting into a bucket, since I couldn't make it to the bathroom in time. The bucket had spilled all over my bed. FML
Today, I fainted in my bathroom, full on naked and sprawled out on my bathroom floor. When I came to, I was in pain from landing on my side and very disoriented. I sat up and could see my husband just roll over in bed and go to sleep. He didn’t even ask me if I was OK. FML
Today, my back hurt really badly, so I decided to stay in bed. After a while, I sat up to shut the door. When I leaned over to reach it, I fell off my bed and face-planted the floor. After picking myself up and getting comfortable in my bed again, I realized the door was still open. FML
Today, I was taking a dump and I pushed so hard that I got light headed and passed out on the floor. FML
Today, I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. At least, I thought I did, until I woke up to my pants, sheets, and boyfriend all soaking wet. FML
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Top comments
JMichael 26
That is a bad day..dear lord I hope I don't have those days.
christian1509 21
In 5th grade I dreamt that I had woken up and walked to the toilet and peed only to wake up in pissed sheets :/
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Comments (92)
soccer_isbae 15
I think you need to get more sleep if your that delirious when you wake up...not trying to be rude but that just doesn't sound healthy
JOEBOBARNOLD 15
That's not really a factor. I've slept 4 and a half hours for a whole year and I've never had that issue. It could be genetic, I don't know, but amount of sleep may not have that effect
feven 32
#20 Whoa seriously? That's insane... you should get that checked up.
mbuck87 19
It sounds like low blood pressure or low blood sugar to me. I'm not a doctor though
Hiktmae 20
Wow, that's a lovely start to your day... Hope you're okay
devildog562 33
I'm hoping some adult beverages the night before helped to disorient you this much. Either way it sucks but made me laugh !
idkyduc123 3
looks like urine trouble
R3TROxLOV3 32
When I was younger, I used to wet the bed a lot. One day my mom got fed up and told me that if I dream about the bathroom, it means I have to pee. I don't know why or how it worked, but it did. I never wet the bed after that. What was the point of telling that story? There wasn't one.
Scarylizard1798 23
Yep...everyone is a zombie when they first wake up
coried91 28
Not really. Especially not a dizzy, lightheaded, pissing zombie. OP sounds as if they had one too many drinks or they really should have had a bit more sleep.
AloysiusWeasley 15
Standing up too quickly and getting dizzy is called orthostatic hypotension. It is very common, and nothing to be worried about. Falling over and becoming disoriented then pissing yourself...yea, try taking some time off from boozing so much, OP.
Ohshitdude 21
maybe you should get that checked.
living_in_chaos 8
That is called getting lightheaded
Bragi 12
Rough morning, OP.