By NotEnoughCleaner - 12/11/2009 17:30 - United Kingdom

Today, I realised I hate my cat. She has 'stress incontinence', which involved her peeing all over my house. Last week I found out she'd been peeing on my stove, and I can't clean off the smell. Now whenever I try to cook some food, the kitchen is flooded with the scent of burning cat pee. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 442
You deserved it 5 670

midgie tells us more.

Oh, she's been to the vet. Lots. And apparently, unlike in humans, cat 'stress incontinence' isn't the kind where you pee when you sneeze, but the kind where you pee everywhere when you're stressed. Why is she stressed? We think she freaked out when my husband worked away from home for a few weeks. Why isn't she better - dunno! She has meds. from the vet to help her. I can't keep her out of the kitchen, due to the design of my funny, v. old, house the kitchen doesn't have a door to close it off from the rest of the house. Also her cat-flap (kitty door) is in the front door, which opens onto ...the kitchen. And she's been peeing under my bed... I've now thoroughly run out of tolerance for cat pee, hence the hatred...

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I've always wondered what the scent of burning cat pee is like. In some Asian cultures burning cat pee is used for aromatherapy. Consider yourself lucky that you have a cat that is aware of this fact. Your own little aroma therapist!

um, ew. but you shouldnt hate her, its not her fault. you should have trained her and possibly have her spayed (if thats the actual problem, usually its only with males tho)

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You could always, I dunno, train her to stay out of the kitchen?

Good luck trying to train a cat, it would be easier to just get rid of the cat. FYL OP. My cat's recently started peeing on the stove too. I don't know why he's doing it. I know the smell, it isn't pleasant.

u cant really train a cat...they tend not to listen...may i suggest treatment .22?

Your cat does not need to be put down. It needs to be medicated and you need to reduce the stress level of the cat. Putting a cat down because of stress incontinence is ridiculously absurd.

I LOVE THAT CAT!!!! is she fat? cus I love fat cats : >

Time to put it down. I recommend cooking it on the very stove it pissed on. That'll teach it to fuck with your shit. If you like cats, get a new one, just make sure it sees you cooking and eating the other one. Then it knows not to fuck with you.

well, to late to do that!

That's freaking sick....I can't even imagine what that would be like. FYL.

OP I personally hate cats (no offense to the cat lovers) and I mostly hate them because they're pretty vicious and can't exactly be what you call potty trained. they roam around and I'm just freaked out by them! 2 things you should do in my opinion- 1. get a new stove that's in your budget or get it clean by professionals &2. get rid of your cat or get some special trainer!!

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problem solved

perdix I think I love you.

Ok I'm gonna bite on this one and say that even thouh I am 75% sure this is sarcasm it is incredibly cruel to kill a pet that way. If OP can't handle the stress he/she should put it up for adoption or give it to a shelter.

Or he could just eat it, simple enough solution

ass. how would you feel if someone cooked you?

Hold the cat down and pee on him. Sweet revenge.

you are my hero.

hahahahahahahahahaha....ydi for not getting a dog.

NO you suck! CAT ARE WORTHLESS

Agreed! Dogs = WIN

this FML is fantastic.

um, ew. but you shouldnt hate her, its not her fault. you should have trained her and possibly have her spayed (if thats the actual problem, usually its only with males tho)

In humans stress incontinence is involuntary, so if you sneeze or cough some urine comes out. If it is the same in cats she couldn't have trained the cat not to be like this

I think they meant trained her to stay out of certain rooms, which is a perfectly reasonable solution. (And yes, cats can be trained like that.) She could also get a diaper. That sucks for you and your cat, but you can't hate her for something she can't help. That's unfair. Just give her away if you can't deal with her problems. If you were in the US, in Illinois, I'd come get the poor thing.

agreed, it's not the cat's fault for not being able to hold it in thus shouldn't be "hated" for something she has no control over, that's basically like me saying that i hate people because they breathe air -.- i'd take her if OP was in the u.s. and also hopefully in cali :(

It could be worse, you could have a DOG with "stress incontinence" LOL, that would suck shit! Dog crap and pee everywhere haha

This is why dogs are man's (or woman's) best friend. Especially a small dog. They are not big enough to get on top of the stove and they only make small messes.

are you serious? little dogs are like not even real dogs. i like my dogs not to squeek. German Shepherds for life

CATS RUEL I love dogs to but me and my cat tinkers have a speical bond :D

I have two English mastiff X rotwilers turbo and Luna and a gentle golden retriver that's dosent retrive and my mentally retarded cat tinkers (whom is sexually confused) AND I LOVE ALL OF THEM

You may already have done so, but you might check with the vet to see if she actually has a urinary track infection. It would cause the same behavior.