Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. Unfortunately, she started fake-moaning like a pornstar before I even entered her, totally killing the mood and my boner. She swore she hadn't moaned, accused me of not finding her attractive enough, and angrily left. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML
Today, as things were getting hot with my girlfriend, it came up that I'm a virgin. She broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML
Today, I lost my virginity. In the middle of it, he just gave up and said he wasn't in the mood anymore. Then I had to listen about his past failed relationships for over an hour. FML
Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, I met a really nice girl at a club, and we went back to my place. I was finally going to lose my virginity, but just as she started kissing me, I panicked and ended up fainting. When I came to, I was still clothed, and she was long gone. FML
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Top comments
thomcmoore 23
Yeah...FYL brother
1tsmenoah 20
You dodged a bullet there, you'll find someone who cares only for who you are.
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Comments (199)
steelerguy43 21
Sucks for you
sayhey22 19
No, nothing was sucked
jblumz 15
I wish there was a button, any button, that could express how you felt. Oh, wait, there is...
schwaka 17
If only there was some way to express how you feel about someone else's comment...oh wait there is.
Schizomaniac 24
If only there was some way to express how you feel about how someone else feels about someone else's comment. Oh wait there is..
Pleonasm 35
Meta-expression.
worldclassrager 39
I think an echo is a good word as well
Willibobs 33
I think the face is indicative of a nasty smell down south
leroyjenkins006 10
Smegma
rosenkrieger223 24
I had a feeling someone was gonna go there at some point..
The_Big_Boss 20
Either your penis is deformed or you had a full on jungle
XCrazyMofo2010X 17
Or smelled like one
DrownedMyFish 18
Or the sight of OP's junk was so amazing that she was lost for words and had to leave until she could think of words to describe such a magnificent sight!
knoney19 12
I'm sorry op things will get better you'll find somebody who won't look like they just deep throated a lemon ;)
pulse41 3
FYL dude... she was rude to do that.
rosenkrieger223 24
I think rude is a freakin understatement here.
Karenezzy 20
Maybe you ate too many acid foods...
Karenezzy 20
Yeah that's what I meant
sunnyray812 42
******* bitch. Good thing you didn't lose you virginity to her. You deserve someone who loves you no matter what size you are.
ifunnybatman 8
Who said it was the size that made her leave
hippyhopgirl 9
What a twist!
ber4fun13 10
This needs a follow-up.
rosenkrieger223 24
Agreed
Kuro_Kamen 12
Pretty sure we'd all like one.
inner_peace 19
Ya pussy stank
jewelia13 12
OP is male.
inner_peace 19
I know. The FML just made me think of a picture with the caption.