Love: Smooth

Smooth

By Rhine - 16/12/2012 23:51 - Barbados - Bridgetown

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 174

You deserved it 15 059

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/12/2012 02:09 - United States - Roswell

Today, at a post-Christmas party, I saw a cute girl standing underneath a mistletoe. I walked up to her and pointed out that we were both standing under a mistletoe. She looked at me, winced, and quickly walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 060

You deserved it 24 523

By Anonymous - 26/12/2014 01:24 - United States - Dallas

Today, at a Christmas party, a cute girl was making a show of standing under some mistletoe. As I walked over, she quickly moved away in the opposite direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 742

You deserved it 4 232

By Anonymous - 13/09/2016 16:33 - United States - Orlando

Today, I eavesdropped as my friend tried hinting to my crush that I like him. He replied, "Haha, eww. She looks like a fuckin' garden gnome." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 539

You deserved it 1 740

By Anonymous - 22/02/2014 02:47 - United States - Irvine

Today, I was at the mall with a couple of friends when we saw a couple of cute boys. I made eye contact with the cutest one. Flustered, I giggled, only to send a wad of snot flying out of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 898

You deserved it 8 245

By Anonymous - 29/11/2014 16:28 - United States - Portland

Today, I thought it would be cute to put on a Santa hat and ask my crush what he wanted for Christmas. He said "A girlfriend." I took off my Santa hat and yelled "Ta-da!" He added, "An ATTRACTIVE girlfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 407

You deserved it 5 752

By Maria - 14/03/2017 15:00 - United Kingdom - York

Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 660

You deserved it 398

By MADfml - 26/02/2009 03:12 - United States

Today, I went to my crushes Mardi Gras party. He was handing out beads to all the girls at the party that flashed him. When he came around to me he stopped and said "I will give you these beads NOT to flash me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 653

You deserved it 5 205

Cool moves

By littlegirl - 07/05/2011 04:46 - Canada

Today, I was sitting with my crush at lunch. Trying to flirt, I tried to stare seductively into his eyes while sucking on my straw. I missed. The straw shot straight up my nose, causing me the worst nose bleed of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 583

You deserved it 45 351

Nice try

By damn... - 28/10/2008 08:40 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a job conference. At lunch, I saw this stunning guy. At dessert time, I coughed so much that the piece of chocolate cake in my mouth went straight onto his glasses. I think it's too late to introduce myself now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 798

You deserved it 6 269

Obsession by Calvin Klein

By Carrie - 04/12/2020 20:02 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I was at a party with my crush, but I didn’t talk to him. After, I walked out to my car, and saw a dent in my car. I then noticed that the dent was exactly the size of my crush’s head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 308

fenixtorador1 11

Monday 17 December 2012 9:01

What did you expect from a muggle?

ayamekiba 13

Monday 17 December 2012 9:08

Ignore the muggle, you should of followed it with 'my name might not be luna but i know how to lovegood.'

Comments

kazumaeri 4

Monday 17 December 2012 10:09

Dem nargles..making people kiss and shit

pdp_fml 21

Monday 17 December 2012 10:13

You should have kissed him! I think that you deserved it.

Angel1000168 16

Monday 17 December 2012 10:18

Was he sobbing hysterically about his ex-boyfriend? Saying that he was murdered by the Dark Lord and was revived as a sparkling wood-fairy?

SoylentCandycorn 10

Monday 17 December 2012 10:46

Pity he didn't get the reference, but not everyone is a fan of Harry Potter. I would have got the reference though, Luna's probably the only thing about Harry Potter I like.

SoylentCandycorn 10

Tuesday 18 December 2012 1:15

I see I got a lot of thumbsdowns for saying I didn't like Harry Potter. How dare I not like a popular series of books! Who do I think I am, having my own opinion?

rapunzel3416 28

Monday 17 December 2012 10:18

I think I would have stood under the mistletoe all night just for the chance to make that reference. I can't believe you thought of that on the spot. That's the kind of thing I always think of after the fact.

french_vulpix 19

Monday 17 December 2012 10:32

If he didn't get it, he's not worth your time :)

Maraudera 6

Monday 17 December 2012 13:37

Just for not understanding a Harry Potter reference- seriously? I've gone out with guys who don't recognize my book or movie references.

apan 13

Monday 17 December 2012 10:32

Don't let the muggles get you down.

whyisitincapital 25

Monday 17 December 2012 10:33

Lol, I had to Google what 'nargles' means. Ah well, don't sweat it OP, these things happen. Maybe he'll Google it as well to find out what you meant, and see the funny side of it.