Birthday, Weird and Parents: Sick burn

Sick burn

By Anonymous - 10/02/2012 21:07 - Belgium

Today, my mother used climate change as an excuse for not remembering my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 204

You deserved it 2 741

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

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Same thing different taste

Alanis Morissette reference

By mei-ah - 12/06/2021 00:01

Today, my mom screamed at me to the point of tears, because it rained on her birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 957

You deserved it 88

By Ya_I_said_it - 26/07/2016 15:31

Today, I've been so stressed out that I forgot my own birthday. I only remembered when my mom talked to me to let me know she wasn't planning on doing anything for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 613

You deserved it 1 507

By Aisu - 08/05/2009 18:14 - United States

Today, my mother called me a bad son for not telling her "Happy Mother's Day". When I told her Mother's Day wasn't until the 10th, she said that I would have forgotten anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 830

You deserved it 3 060

And I Oop

By Anonymous - 15/01/2021 23:01

Today, my mom was screaming and throwing things at me and I didn’t know why. Then I checked the date. Her birthday was yesterday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 394

You deserved it 1 276

By Anonymous - 07/11/2015 14:58 - United States - Niles

Today, my mother had to ask me when my birthday was, because she gets it confused with the day she bought our old car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 944

You deserved it 1 696

Classic Mom

By secret - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Ashford

Today, I got a text from my mom shaming me for forgetting my sister's birthday. It isn't her birthday today, it's mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 431

You deserved it 2 300

The blame game

By Anonymous - 12/01/2016 14:44

Today, I'm mad at my dad for forgetting it's my birthday. He's mad at me for not reminding him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 779

You deserved it 1 908

By bad birthdays - 16/08/2014 05:09 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, it's my birthday. When I asked my mom if we were gonna do anything special for my birthday. She said, "Don't lie to me. It's not your birthday." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 006

You deserved it 3 454

By mydadforgetsme - 04/11/2015 17:26 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my dad forgot it's my birthday. When I told him about it, he accused me of lying and threatened to ground me for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 686

You deserved it 1 466

Zoom call from hell

By low_expectations - 19/08/2020 02:04

Today, I was yelled at by my mom for not communicating to the rest of my family about the zoom call SHE planned and asked for. The call was to celebrate my birthday. Apparently, it was my responsibility to coordinate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 510

You deserved it 100

Outsider_77 0

Saturday 11 February 2012 0:35

Global warming is a pretty hot topic these days

bertoelmexicano 6

Saturday 11 February 2012 0:40

Next time she's in the shower, flush a toilet and blame it on global warning

Comments

2O12 6

Saturday 11 February 2012 1:51

Next thing you know scientists will be using your birthday as an excuse for global warming.. Wait, what?

xXRazelleLuniiXx 9

Saturday 11 February 2012 1:52

"I'm sorry I forgot about your birthday honey. I was on a date with a polar bear."

hecseferblade 1

Saturday 11 February 2012 2:59

DAMN YOU GLOBAL WARMING!!!!!

Hakando 5

Saturday 11 February 2012 3:05

She must be old

TECC 4

Saturday 11 February 2012 3:49

poor little baby

THE_A_TEEN 27

Saturday 11 February 2012 5:15

Are you using sarcasm and being an ass, or are you serious?

xXRazelleLuniiXx 9

Saturday 11 February 2012 6:46

I'm not sure what this guy is doing, but his comment coordinates with his profile picture quite nicely.

happilyever2012 6

Saturday 11 February 2012 4:17

Well you'll know what to use an excuse for. I told my grandma that. Not proud of it but she wouldn't leave me alone.

BellaMarta 19

Saturday 11 February 2012 4:34

How is that even possible?

musicluvr2000 11

Saturday 11 February 2012 4:44

Hey at least it's protecting the environment, but that is a sorry excuse

truehitman2010 0

Saturday 11 February 2012 4:52

globlal warming isn't even real.

Trainwizard 1

Saturday 11 February 2012 5:12

The sea level rose and got salt water in her head. Fyl.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I discovered my girlfriend stealing from my bank account. She thought she was smart by disguising her transfers as 'GAS BILL' or 'NETFLIX BILL'. Um, Netflix doesn’t cost £100 a month, and BILL is spelt with two Ls, not three. Reported for fraud; got my money back; single again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 642

You deserved it 74

Today, my ex-girlfriend got really mad at me because she said all men treat her like a whore. She even got upset that she thinks that I might think of her the same way. I couldn't help but to laugh in her face, because she cheated on me with said men and the fact is that she's right. I'm sad, but It's done Sweetie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 438

You deserved it 101

The Top

Today, dressed in my sexiest nightie, I asked my boyfriend in the most sensual voice possible what he'd like me do to for him tonight. His eyed widened, he started clapping wildly, and then shrieked, "SPAGHETTI CARBONARA!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 672

You deserved it 5 052

Today, I was leaving the grocery store when an old woman started yelling at me for not holding the door open for her. She accused me of being "everything wrong with the younger generation". It was an automatic door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 213

You deserved it 3 279

Today, I went to use the porta potty at the construction site I work at and found two homeless people having sex in it. I almost got fired, because my advisor blamed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 389

You deserved it 4 105

Today, after years of secretly faking my orgasms, my husband gave me my first real one. Afterward was also the first time he ever accused me of faking it because, "It was different from all the other times." FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 960

You deserved it 46 318

Today, after years of torment by my anxiety disorders and therapy and medication not helping, I've made the decision to try hypnosis. After doing a Google search and finding out my therapist is a man, my overly jealous fiancé insisted on joining, "because he might hypnotise you into cheating." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 195

You deserved it 2 383

Today, my mother told me she forgot what a verb is. I'm homeschooled, and she's my teacher. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 705

You deserved it 5 090