Today, I found out my dad gets my younger brother a Big Gulp from 7/11 every time he mows the yard. I mowed for three years straight and never got anything. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought I would surprise my dad by mowing our entire two acre lawn. When he got home, instead of being grateful like I had hoped, he yelled at me for cutting in vertical lines instead of horizontal. FML
Today, wanting to do something nice for my dad, I mowed the lawn. He grounded me for "emasculating" him. FML
Today, my father bought a riding lawn mower. We don't have a lawn. FML
Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML
Today, I found out my dad spent most of the $500 I earned from mowing lawns on an Xbox 360 for himself. He was the one who encouraged me to put the money in the bank for college and to learn responsibility. I'm 14 years old. He's 37. FML
Today, my mom offered me a reward if I went out and mowed our lawn. After 45 mins of pushing a lawnmower in 95-degree heat and getting stung by a bee, I go inside and ask my mom for my reward. She comes up to me, gives me a 'loving hug' and says, "Thank you." FML
Today, I found out that a two-day job I helped my dad do for his old friend was actually a job for a real customer, who paid my dad £4500. All I got for my two days work was coffee and Co-op sandwiches for dinner. FML
Today, I gave my dad $40 and asked him if he could get me lunch on his way back home. Long story short, he came back empty handed telling me it was my fault for trusting him with McNuggets. FML
Today, I met my father, who I hadn't seen since I was a baby, at Subway. He made me pay for his meal. FML
Today, my mom told me I was a bad daughter because I didn't get anything for my parents' anniversary. I just sent my brother a check for $400 for my share of their gift. FML
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Top comments
bloopaloop 27
He is a better negotiator than you. You could learn something here
Slim87R 7
This is your lesson for how the real world works. You are going to get compensated the absolute minimum that you are willing to work for. Obviously you were willing to work for free while your brother had a little negotiation. Learn from your brother, because every job you take from here on out will be the same. Know your worth!
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Comments (9)
bloopaloop 27
He is a better negotiator than you. You could learn something here
RichardPencil 32
Are you fat?
BurnInDemonFire 39
Well now your brother will get diabetes three years sooner than you. Take the win while you can.
Slim87R 7
This is your lesson for how the real world works. You are going to get compensated the absolute minimum that you are willing to work for. Obviously you were willing to work for free while your brother had a little negotiation. Learn from your brother, because every job you take from here on out will be the same. Know your worth!
bl3ur0z3 17
Different rewards/incentives for different kids. My youngest gets a sticker for pooping on the potty while his sister is allowed to go to the playground across the street without an adult. They're only two years apart but he's autistic and she's overly mature for her age.
mayaklast 12
Your father has to love you more than your brother. Feeding that kind of stuff to your kids can only come from a deep-rooted desire to watch them die early - they are so bad for your health they've been banned from several places (New-York, for example) and don't exist outside of the USA, to my knowledge.
AmbrosiaFan 19
Yeah that's what sucks about being the older sibling.
Brightside86 31
You're better off without the 1,000 calories of pure sugar.