Today, I was sitting shotgun in the car. A huge bug came inside, and everyone began to freak out so naturally I began to swat at it. I got the fly, but I also cracked the windshield. I paid $229 to kill a bug. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, about to fall asleep, a bug started buzzing behind the screen to my window. Losing my sanity, I punched the screen, forgetting all about the glass. I now have a cracked window and one still annoying bug. FML
Today, as I was driving, a massive cockroach clicked its way across my windshield. I pulled over to fling it out the window, but it spread its wings and flew around like a hook-armed stabbing machine. I lost it in the dark car and now I can't find it. It's going to be a long drive home. FML
Today, I ruined my computer screen trying to kill a fly. FML
Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML
Today, as I was hanging washing out in the sun, a huge cicada flew into my face and somehow got behind my glasses. I screamed and ripped them off and ran away. I came back to a broken pair of VERY expensive glasses. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to pee on a small bug in the toilet. A much larger bug thought it would be funny to fly into my eye while I was doing this. FML
Today, while I was relaxing outside drinking a beer after a long day, a moth decided to fly right into my ear canal. I instinctively threw my hand up to swat it out. With the same hand holding the beer. I soaked the side of my face and down my ear. At least I got the bug out. FML
Today, I noticed an extremely large bug buzzing around my room. After several attempts, I stomped on it with my shoe. I was trying to get a closer look at my victory when it flew into my nostril. Turns out it was just playing dead. FML
Today, I was taking a break in my work truck when I saw a huge swarm of bees flying my way. I have a hand crank window so I started cranking it up as fast as I could and the knob snapped off before it closed and I got stung by the whole swarm before I could get out. FML
Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML
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Top comments
kelseysue92 0
Are you the hulk?!? Fly make hulk angry....HULK SMASH!
a_b_c_soup 0
so....you hit THAT hard to swat a fly? fail...
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Comments (132)
Leviathan_fml 0
if this wasn't fake, YDI. however, you'd have to be more built than the Governor of California to do this.
aego56 0
#20 What the hell does that have anything to do with it?!
lnm701 0
You must be incredibly strong. And not very bright - a bad combination.
massesareasses 0
I think his mistyped that fml i think what he was trying to say was... "Today, I was sitting in the car with a shotgun . A huge bug came inside, and everyone began to freak out so naturally I began to shoot at it. I got the fly, but I also blew the shit out of the windshield. I paid $229 to kill a bug. FML
jessxoxo28 5
i would have freaked out to but, mabe not break the windshield, lol!!!
klutzywriter 0
Wow. Strong much? Superman to the rescue...to kill a freaking fly... Geez. Roll the window down or something.
MrJentipede 2
He must have swat at it with a hammer.
headshotkillz 0
you can tell which FML's are made up...especially ones when you break a windshield with your hand
TeenTiger 0
You were freaking out over a fly? WTF is wrong with you people. Do you live in a ******* bubble? YDI for being such a failure.
stonerchu 0
When I read this at first, misread and though the OP was sitting "with" and shotgun and use it to shoot bug.