Today, I was sitting shotgun in the car. A huge bug came inside, and everyone began to freak out so naturally I began to swat at it. I got the fly, but I also cracked the windshield. I paid $229 to kill a bug. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, about to fall asleep, a bug started buzzing behind the screen to my window. Losing my sanity, I punched the screen, forgetting all about the glass. I now have a cracked window and one still annoying bug. FML
Today, as I was driving, a massive cockroach clicked its way across my windshield. I pulled over to fling it out the window, but it spread its wings and flew around like a hook-armed stabbing machine. I lost it in the dark car and now I can't find it. It's going to be a long drive home. FML
Today, I ruined my computer screen trying to kill a fly. FML
Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML
Today, as I was hanging washing out in the sun, a huge cicada flew into my face and somehow got behind my glasses. I screamed and ripped them off and ran away. I came back to a broken pair of VERY expensive glasses. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to pee on a small bug in the toilet. A much larger bug thought it would be funny to fly into my eye while I was doing this. FML
Today, while I was relaxing outside drinking a beer after a long day, a moth decided to fly right into my ear canal. I instinctively threw my hand up to swat it out. With the same hand holding the beer. I soaked the side of my face and down my ear. At least I got the bug out. FML
Today, I noticed an extremely large bug buzzing around my room. After several attempts, I stomped on it with my shoe. I was trying to get a closer look at my victory when it flew into my nostril. Turns out it was just playing dead. FML
Today, I was taking a break in my work truck when I saw a huge swarm of bees flying my way. I have a hand crank window so I started cranking it up as fast as I could and the knob snapped off before it closed and I got stung by the whole swarm before I could get out. FML
Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML
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Top comments
kelseysue92 0
Are you the hulk?!? Fly make hulk angry....HULK SMASH!
a_b_c_soup 0
so....you hit THAT hard to swat a fly? fail...
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Comments (132)
mobius8 0
BS. Windshields are incredibly hard to even crack if you're trying.
life_is_fucked02 0
Get better insurance, it's free for me if I crack my windshield.
hypnos_fml 0
if you hit it from the inside they are a lot easier than you might think
DaemonDoC 0
sry but can anyone please explain what 'Today, I was sitting shotgun in the car. ' means? as for the fml itself... YDI. why would you hit THAT hard?!
wholeon 0
#14, "shotgun" -- front passenger seat. As for the OP, I don't think this is possible. I've seen folks hit windshields with baseball bats, etc, and not be able to break them. It's safety glass. I don't think there's any way you can slap one hard enough to break it.
FMLttmx 0
probably because his windshiels was weak, not the type to withstand THAT kind of blow
Onion_fml 0
Shotgun means the front passenger seat of a car. I have no idea where it comes from myself.
Altrown_fml 0
How did you manage to break the windshield while swatting a fly? o_O Were you swatting with rock or something?
Sue21 0
rofl #8
ammali 0
Holy junk, you swatted THAT hard? Wow.
rukusrazor 0
Ummm, this is why no one wants the Nissan Cube.
DaemonDoC 0
thanks, #15 and #16! ;)