Today, I realized I was getting a bit chubbier than usual. I decided to go for a little jog to stay in shape. Little did I know, my neighbors that just moved in brought along with them, a fully grown German Shepherd. Not tamed. My "jog" quickly turned into a "sprint for my life". FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I walked outside to see my friend frantically waving and running at me, yelling something I couldn't understand. I smiled and started to jog over to him until I realized he was screaming "RUN!!!" We spent the next 10 minutes running from his neighbor's 5 vicious chihuahuas. FML
Today, knowing very well that I need to be more active, I went for a walk. It quickly turned into a sprint when I was attacked and chased by a dog. FML
Today, while on a run off campus with my german shepherd, I tried to impress a couple of hot fraternity guys playing football outside of their house. I broke out into a full sprint. I then got tangled in my dog's leash and fell straight in to a parked jeep knocking myself unconscious. FML
Today, my fully grown, 90-pound German Shepherd sniffed and wagged his tail as a guy mugged me. FML
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
Today, feeling out of shape, I went for a jog. I got mugged. FML
Today, I entered my neighbors’ yard around a shorter corner than usual. Their old dog is getting a bit slow, but unfortunately only in her head: By the time she recognized me as harmless, she had already run up and bitten me. FML
Today, I was going for a relaxing walk but my dog broke free from his leash. At the same time, my 80 year-old neighbor was leaving her apartment. My dog ran inside her home and she screamed. I ended up in her bedroom, running around her bed, chasing my dog who was trying to get at her pantyhose. FML
Today, I had to chase my dog all the way down the street, watching in horror as she proudly showed all of my neighbors my bra. FML
Today, I decided to go for a jog to try and get fit. I definitely got my exercise in, because I was mercilessly chased by a goose. FML
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Top comments
Dalliance 4
I assume you made it.
WeezyBites 6
Pretty good way to stay in shape
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Comments (185)
anoellem 1
Having a murderous dog chasing me tends to make my workouts better/more effective. Stay positive.
SkoomaKi 27
Good for you for going out for a jog! You got even more calories burned being chased by the dog. Day well spent OP.
Kikitann 9
Oh look! I found my skooma dealer.
FireGamer 2
Well at least you weren't lonely.
rammy125 4
That dog is saving your life and you don't even know it.. Respect to the dog
THE_A_TEEN 27
Why are you giving respect to a dog that is obviously not trained and can hurt someone? ****, obesity won't get OP, but a dog might.
Zomg_Okay 26
I'm not sure "respect" is the right way to put it but at the same time it's hardly the dog's fault that the owner didn't train it.
cmcmluver 0
well that's a good motivator. you'll loose weight in no time! ;)
cmcmluver 0
well that's a good motivator. you'll loose weight in no time! ;)
ILoveEggnog 7
Had the same thing happen to me once, but with a Rottweiler. Scary as heck.
pbonham 22
How could you run away? German Shepherds are so cute!!
ILoveEggnog 7
And their fangs are just adorable.
laden_swallow09 34
And their guttural bark is sooooo soothing!
Jewnut 0
that's what you get for being self conscious
THE_A_TEEN 27
Yes, OP is at fault here because (s)he wants to be healthy. I bet you just sit at your couch all day.
TheMathMajor 26
Hey, mods, there is a typo. OP typed "to go" twice.