Today, I decided to go for a jog to try and get fit. I definitely got my exercise in, because I was mercilessly chased by a goose. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I went for a "relaxing" walk on a local trail. I got chased by an angry goose halfway back to my car. Apparently, it didn’t appreciate my "peaceful" attempt to take a selfie with it. FML
Today, while on a run, I thought I'd run into a flock of geese in a field. Doing so, I learned that when you do this alone, the birds don't fly away, they attack. FML
Today, I decided to get back into shape. I went for a jog around my neighborhood. The ice cream truck followed me for my whole jog, mocking me. FML
Today, feeling out of shape, I went for a jog. I got mugged. FML
Today, I went off for a jog. Outside, I saw my really cute neighbour, so in an effort to appear fit, I accelerated and kept my head up. As I got close, I smiled at him, just as a huge fly flew right up my nose. FML
Today, knowing very well that I need to be more active, I went for a walk. It quickly turned into a sprint when I was attacked and chased by a dog. FML
Today, I realized my anger management has hit a new low when I screamed at a goose for being a goose. FML
Today, I realized I was getting a bit chubbier than usual. I decided to go for a little jog to stay in shape. Little did I know, my neighbors that just moved in brought along with them, a fully grown German Shepherd. Not tamed. My "jog" quickly turned into a "sprint for my life". FML
Today, in order to try and get over my slight fear of swans, I went down to the local park to feed them. One decided that I looked tastier than the bread I was throwing and chased me around the feeding area while everybody laughed. FML
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
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Top comments
tounces7 27
Did you thank the Goose afterwards and offer to hire him as a personal trainer?
KingAdrock 16
Geese are demons.
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Comments (3)
tounces7 27
Did you thank the Goose afterwards and offer to hire him as a personal trainer?
KingAdrock 16
Geese are demons.
IHaveThePower 16
Okay SO, if you see a goose, follow these steps: 1. Stop running 2. Walk CALMLY around the goose, keeping away far enough so the goose doesn't start flapping their wings or hissing 3. Proceed on your merry way. Geese are pretty chill--you just have to stay far enough away so they know you aren't gonna fight them, and not run straight at them. Animals can't really tell what humans are doing, so if you just give them some space, they'll leave you alone every time. I've had geese walk right up to me to eat some grass near me before because I don't flap around or run. They really won't bug you unless you bug them. Don't go near squirrels or chipmunks, though. Those are tiny demons in fursuits.