Dreams and Liar: Private

Private

By E.. - 20/10/2021 20:00

Today, for the first time I had to lie to the man I intend to marry, because I had a very intense and hot dream about Leslie Nielsen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 849

You deserved it 287

Dreams Liar

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/05/2014 21:07 - United States

Today, I had a wonderful dream where I got married to the perfect guy, then had the best sex of my life on a beautiful honeymoon. The only problem is that my "husband" was the snowman from Frozen, and that I got sad when I realized it was just a dream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 408

You deserved it 9 998

Not such a happy ending

By JustJared - 15/09/2021 05:00

Today, I get to see my best friend and love of my life of two years marry the man she loves. Back then, I lied and told her I was gay to avoid her finding out my feelings for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 234

You deserved it 1 950

It's not for everyone

By Stacey - 07/05/2022 22:00

Today, my fiancé had a nightmare and sat bolt upright in bed, claimed he had a nightmare where we were married, then his head hit the pillow and he was asleep again. That was his nightmare. Us being married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 830

You deserved it 157

By bride - 14/02/2011 06:24 - United States

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 017

You deserved it 10 073

By newlywed - 27/02/2011 05:18 - United States

Today, I married a wonderful man. Even though both of us were no longer virgins, we decided to wait until marriage to sleep together. He just told me I was the worst he's ever had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 996

You deserved it 13 430

Domino dancing

By Anonymous - 06/01/2023 18:00

Today, I watched the love of my life look me straight in the eye and lie to me with well-practised ease about where she spent last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 431

You deserved it 507

Say nothing

By Anonymous - 28/01/2021 00:58 - United States - Edmond

Today, right now, my husband is on the phone with his friend. Last night I had a dream I was cheating on him with this friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 782

Desperate for D

By sadsadperson - 07/09/2011 08:51 - Australia

Today, I lied to my diary about getting laid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 909

You deserved it 30 851

By Anonymous - 28/12/2011 05:26 - United States

Today, my girlfriend woke up in the middle of the night, crying. When I asked her why, she said that she had a dream where we were getting married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 727

You deserved it 3 590

By Emmz91 - 17/06/2019 23:03

Today, I tried keeping a surprise secret from my fiance. Turns out, under the influence of my sleeping tablets, which after I take them, I forget everything I've said, I spilled the beans. So much for the surprise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 607

You deserved it 293

Chazzster 26

Wednesday 20 October 2021 21:06

You are human. We all have fantasies and we are not responsible for our dreams.

Jon Tessler 14

Wednesday 20 October 2021 21:12

why. would you lie about a dream?

Comments

Chazzster 26

Wednesday 20 October 2021 21:06

You are human. We all have fantasies and we are not responsible for our dreams.

Jon Tessler 14

Wednesday 20 October 2021 21:12

why. would you lie about a dream?

Aiden89 23

Wednesday 20 October 2021 21:33

Surely you can’t be serious?

JasonThorn 19

Saturday 23 October 2021 15:03

I believe she was serious. And don't call her Shirley.

Plop 17

Wednesday 20 October 2021 21:36

Did you dream about his naked gun?

RichardPencil 30

Wednesday 20 October 2021 22:58

Surely, you can't feel guilty for fantasizing about a man who died over a decade ago. And don't call me Shirley.

phybreawptic 13

Thursday 21 October 2021 11:54

Does he often ask you if you're dreaming about Frank Drebin?

eellik 10

Monday 25 October 2021 21:24

From the council of men, we understand.

Keywords

Love Health Sex Family Relatable Awkward AITA Wake up Work Miscellaneous Dentist Dad jokes Customers Annoying Fire Ableism Vacation Capitalism Transportation Cute Healthy Lifestyle Intimacy Wanker Sextoys Tinder Parents Kids Money Embarrassing Dogs

The Top

Today, I was dismissed because of my company's strict "no drugs" policy. Yesterday, I had a talk with my team leader and confessed that I have to take antidepressants; this arse then reported it to the management, and they fired me because they are not aware of what these pills contain, and it could affect my performance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 733

You deserved it 111

Today, I got wasted at a party and went out to my car to get something. I went back to the house and realized I got locked out. After knocking on the door, ringing the doorbell, and shouting "LET ME INNNN" my friend called and asked where I was. That's when I realized I was at the wrong house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 078

You deserved it 39 580

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I ordered sex toys online and had them delivered to my dorm room. I put my parents' address for the billing information because I didn't want the bill sent to my dorm after I moved out. The toys were sent to my parents house instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 551

You deserved it 78 274

Today, the cows on the neighboring farm have been lowing loudly for 3 days straight. The guy who runs the farm is unreachable. The people who own the farm and live right next to the stable claim they don’t hear a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 718

You deserved it 144

Today, I walked in on my husband having sex with the shower wall. When I got in the shower with him he immediately went soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 868

You deserved it 3 076

Today, I made myself a hot pocket for lunch. I managed to scald myself on the red-hot cheese, and at the same time bite into the center, which was somehow still frozen solid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 055

You deserved it 7 154

Today, I tried talking to my doctor about my insomnia several times, but all she does is prescribe me antidepressants, and tells me to take melatonin or exercise. I ate two melatonin gummies nearly 12 hours ago. I haven’t slept a wink, and my insurance won’t pay for another doctor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 982

You deserved it 118

Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 740

You deserved it 4 917