Holidays, Christmas, Gifts and Awkward: Perfect!

Perfect!

By BahHumbug - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Painesville

Today, after weeks of keeping it a secret, I excitedly gave my boyfriend what I thought to be the perfect Christmas present. Turns out lock picking sets are illegal in Ohio. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 336

You deserved it 8 153

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

Pleased to meet you

By DB. - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my parents met my boyfriend's parents for the first time… while they were bailing us out of jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 855

You deserved it 61 917

Just browsing

By OneGirlsLife - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, someone tried to break into my car. They tried to do so by jamming a key into my lock, only for the key to break. I guess the key cut their hand, because I had the pleasure of finding the person's blood all over my passenger door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 033

You deserved it 287

One day…

By CaeliLady - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my friend and I were at the mall and saw a "Grow Your Own Boyfriend" toy. I remarked that I already had one of those, and she freaked out, very loudly and openly, about me "finally having a boyfriend". I had to embarrassingly explain I meant I had the toy... not an actual boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 402

You deserved it 6 491

By singlesoon - 25/08/2009 04:26 - Canada

Today, I bailed my soon to be ex-husband out of jail after he'd been arrested for soliciting. Soliciting an undercover cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 732

You deserved it 7 142

By janae - 06/08/2018 23:30

Today, I discovered that I am pregnant. I questioned my boyfriend and he admitted to not using a condom because he thought we were just doing "practice sex". FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 925

You deserved it 1 721

Scary!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, all because he's scared of my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 207

You deserved it 5 870

The argument for fake IDs

By bryans_fresh - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I wanted to use my gift card for a liquor store. I went to pay the cashier, who said he needed to see my license. I gave it to him, along with my gift card. After paying, he asked me if I wanted him to cut it up, since the card was now worthless. I said yes. He cut up the wrong card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 178

You deserved it 4 856

Collector's item

By Pon - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, my girlfriend bought me a new hockey jersey and donated my old one. My old one was signed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 893

You deserved it 588

Treat yourself

By birthday bash - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. She decided that her "gift to herself" would be to leave the loser who has been holding her back for two years. Hello, my name is Ben, and I'm that loser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 193

You deserved it 5 231

Secret

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 023

You deserved it 2 884

tigerisabelle 31

Monday 28 December 2015 9:34

Wait, why would you buy your boyfriend a lock-picking set? Was it part of one of those corny things where you're all like "now you hold the key to everywhere... including my heart..." Or does he just enjoy breaking into houses? So many unanswered questions!

INSEKTORADA 10

Monday 28 December 2015 9:45

Plot twist he is in prison.

Comments

Joshawott 21

Monday 28 December 2015 14:11

The real question is - why did you think a lock-picking set was a perfect gift?

heavenlyassbutt 11

Monday 28 December 2015 15:58

Why just why would you give this type of gift.

derpyshy 16

Monday 28 December 2015 16:12

The fuel station at my work has a lock picking set, as way too many people lock their keys in their cars. So I can see the practicality. However, as a gift...

CoupeDeAce 6

Monday 28 December 2015 16:40

Lockpicking is a profession.

MasterofPuppys 7

Monday 28 December 2015 17:16

Who told you they were illegal? I'm a cop in Ohio and they are not illegal.

kirasant 19

Monday 28 December 2015 17:34

If he plays a lot of games as a stealth character, I could see it being a great a gift. I once came very close to getting into my house after locking myself out using skills from a game. Sadly I had crappy wire to work with. So yeah, I'd love a set.