Today, I was at work and I needed to pee. In my haste, I forgot to lock the door. A coworker walked in on me and I bolted up mid-stream to slam the door back shut. I had pee down my leg and pee squishing in my shoes for the rest of the day. I can still remember his tone of voice, yelling, "Sorry"! FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at work, I was on my break when I had to use the bathroom. I was on the toilet taking a dump when the door latch loosened and the door swung open. The little girl standing there took one look and screamed. Security busted in. My pants were still down. FML
Today, I walked into a public toilet and I opened a stall door, only to discover someone who had forgotten to lock the door sitting on the can. Instead of saying "Sorry," I panicked and said, "Nice shoes!" I then had to wait until they left because I was too embarrassed to face them. FML
Today, I had to pee really bad so I tried to unlock my door as fast as I could. I put my key in and turned it too hard, the key snapped inside. I ended up peeing on myself. FML
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I peed myself in the dressing room after work when I sneezed. Someone else just walked in as I was trying to dry off my jeans with paper, and probably smelled that I had peed myself. FML
Today, I had to take an urgent dump at work. I noticed too late there was no toilet paper left, so I had to risk doing a quick "pants around the knees" shuffle to the next stall. I locked eyes with the window cleaner at the same time I heard someone enter from behind me. FML
Today, at work I had to use the bathroom. I asked my boss to watch my register and quickly walked into the bathroom. I squatted down and peed. A minute later I heard someone ask over our walkie talkie system who was using the bathroom. I had been pressing the intercom button while I peed. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML
Today, I was in a rush and didn't notice that the bathroom stall I chose at work had a broken lock. Halfway through my business, a coworker barged in. We locked eyes for an awkward eternity. FML
Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML
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Top comments
upandover 15
Poll: can you stop mid-pee? Respond below
Tripartita 45
Don't think of yourself as covered in piss, OP. Think of yourself as slightly less vulnerable* to jellyfish stings! *Psst, the slightest bit of research shows that Friends episode is actually bullshit, but let the OP have their moment.
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Comments (37)
kctrl 8
Couldn't you have used your words OP? Just yell and push the door shut with your foot. Yes this has happened to me too.
chessu 21
I really wanna say FYL but I literally can't comprehend how someone could forget to lock the stall door, especially in a public place. How is it not an automatic reaction? And as it's the OP's work place it's not like the haven't used it before and didn't know how the specific lock worked. YDI, my friend.
whatshuman43 8
Oh Canada, the only time you're supposed to just say EH! Yet you piss on yourself instead, glad you're my neighbors:)
Snuffleupaguss 15
Why not just finish peeing and deal with your coworker having seen your butt.. It's a lot better than peeing on yourself
Tsumetai_ 11
I don't think it was their butt they were worried about the co-worker seeing. The fml says they 'bolted up' which suggests they were sitting down and most likely female. It's much more embarrassing for a female to have a male co-worker accidentally walk in on them in the bathroom.
kashers 11
I'd soak my shoes in the sink since it was already soaked with pee. Would rather squish around in water-sodden shoes than pee :<
GoddessMadoka 12
Everyone is blaming the person in the bathroom for not locking the door...Apparently, knocking before you go into a shared restroom is something only people with manners practice.
chessu 21
Never have I ever knocked on a stall door and never have I ever walked in on anyone?? If it's an actual door and it's open, I assume it's empty (though I might open it slowly), or that it's one of those big ones with stalls. If it's a stall door, if it's open, I assume it's empty; if it's closed but not locked I try to sneak peek for feet. I would NEVER knock
CAH0105 3
That's when you claim to have locked the door. It's a mechanical error!