Today, I learned that just because you live on a different continent, it doesn't mean your mother won't come knocking when you are having sex. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I learned that even when you put a sock on the door because you are having sex with your boyfriend, it doesn't mean your mom won't walk into your brand new apartment for a "surprise visit." FML
Today, despite being 21 years old and living in my own place, my mom still managed to walk in on me whacking off. FML
Today, after nearly two months of no sex, I got cockblocked by an unexpected visit by my mother. FML
Today, I was having sex with a guy I met and in the middle of it his mother called him. After stopping to answer the phone, he tried to put me on with her because she didn't believe anyone would actually sleep with him. FML
Today, I’m 20 and my mom is well aware I’m having sex. Nonetheless, this morning when my boyfriend was going down on me under the covers, she marched into my room without knocking, dumped a load of wet laundry on my sofa, and walked back out. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of someone having sex in the room next to me. I don't have a roommate. Turns out my mom thought I was out of town and used her extra key to bring a guy over for sex. FML
Today, my plans for having sex with my girlfriend were thwarted for the sixth time in a row by my own mother. I found out later that she's been reading my texts so she knew when to drop by and ruin everything. FML
Today, I realized why it's not a good idea to sleep with your boyfriend when he still lives with his mom. She may walk in, make you get dressed, and demand what you have to say for yourself. Trust me, "Your son is good at sex" is not the right answer. FML
Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML
Today, my mom decided it was a good idea to remind me about my non-existent sex life while all the family was having dinner. FML
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Top comments
luke_nylan 7
Mum: *flies plane to the continent you live on* Mum: are you guys having sex? Mum: *flies back*
nikkon416 13
Did you put a sock on the door?
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Comments (98)
Enslaved 38
"Keep A-Knockin' (but You Can't Come In)" Ugh! My family is the same way! Always dropping by unannounced. This is the main reason I chose to live in a strict gated community! But somehow I feel if I had a mother like yours she'd still find a way to bypass that! FYL
NessaMae 19
my mom loves that song lol
alycion 39
Gates are so easy to get by. Just wait until someone goes through and follow. I would do that when I left my clicker home when we lived in one. They changed to that from codes because every delivery guy in the area had a code. The gate seemed more like a way of keeping the alligators out.
Enslaved 38
I have two gates-- one with a guardman. Now I only have to deal with my nosy next door neighbours! :P
Jabberwockyy 13
Damn how do i get into one of those places? lol.
awilliams44 9
Lots of love intended!
Linemanmike 17
Maybe she misinterpreted the sock on the door thinking you needed help with your laundry?
YourVoiceofReasn 6
She sees you when you're sleeping, she knows when you're awake.
SuperMew 22
I might be one of the worst people ever... but I absolutely hate people dropping in on me to "surprise" me. If you wish to visit, all you have to do is call and ask if I am available. I work nights, sometimes, and used to have a friend who would come at like noon to "hang out." She would get mad if I didn't answer and it finally ended the friendship. Anyways, as someone who enjoys sex, but does not get it enough, you text me if you think you are coming to stay with me. Especially if you are from out of town.
Rainhawk94 27
Don't get enough eh?
AngelLovesDerby 10
Wow that really sucks OP!!
thenewgirl29 20
I do not like unexpected company but if your mom took the time to plan a trip to surprise you then it certainly is a nice gesture and she probably was just missing you a lot.
superdom 12
God dammit mom stop following me you wonder why I'm paranoid about people following me when I have sex
worldclassrager 41
Surprise visits are sometimes the worst...maybe locking up the house wouldn't be a bad idea...
thisisg 9
surprise!