Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, feeling so depressed to the point of having suicidal thoughts, I texted a girl I had a crush on. Her response? "Can you please delete my number, you're getting annoying." FML
Today, my phone decided to delete all my numbers. I posted on Facebook that people should message or text me if they felt like I should have their number. I didn't get a single reply. FML
Today, I sent my mom a text to tell her about my promotion at work. She responded with, "Who is this?" It turns out that she deleted my number, because I "never call." FML
Today, I saw the girl I had started dating changed her Facebook relationship status to "In a relationship". Naturally, I changed mine too. The next time I logged on, she had commented, "Really?! Who?!" She was serious. FML
Today, I asked a girl I liked for her number, but she claimed she had a broken phone and was getting a new one for Christmas. Unhinged, I go home and go onto Facebook. First thing I see is her status: "Why is no one answering my calls?" FML
Today, I went to a rock concert and met this amazing girl. We started talking and then swapped cell numbers. Five minutes later, she asks to see my cellphone, so I gave it to her. Once I got home I went to text her and saw that she deleted her number. FML
Today, my girlfriend got into my Facebook account and changed our relationship status to single, just to see which of my friends would "like" it. After revealing to me what she did, she now says I can no longer be friends with anyone who liked it. FML
Today, a girl told me she couldn't text me anymore, because she was too tired and had to sleep. Over the next three hours, she updated her Facebook and Twitter accounts, and made a YouTube video of herself singing. FML
Today, I saw the girl I like had posted a status on Facebook, saying, “I’m sick of being lonely, why don’t any guys wanna date me?! I think I’m gonna spend my life alone.” I asked her out once and she turned me down. When I commented this fact on her post proving her statement untrue, she blocked me. FML
Today, I updated my Facebook status as, "Lost all my contacts, need numbers". My mom commented, "Her phone didn't get reset, she just doesn't have any friends." Her comment got 32 likes. FML
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Top comments
BlindyMcGee 2
Go buy the eggs, I'll drive.
jojimugo 20
Just write under the comment " nobody texts you because you are a bitch"
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Comments (157)
BlueHue 0
I think that was a subtle hint... That sucks though :(
ZebulonPike 8
Notice how he said "liked" instead of "like"
perdix 31
What she is really saying is that she doesn't want you stalking her on Facebook -- she wants you to up your game and pursue her in real life. Prepare a nice room for her in your basement (with a toilet in easy reach of her tether) and then sit in a panel van just outside her house. Glad I could do the translation for you ;)
ImInABox 6
That's when you text bomb her with, "You're a bitch."
AshleyCole 0
People are bitches. I'm sorry:/
laughytaffy 5
Dude, move on. She's not worth your time!
Mr25_fml 14
Well she's not a quality friend. And since she is no quality friend, I suggest keying her car and pissing on the hood one time.
EyeCeYu 7
Mabye shes trying to save you time and embarisment. But that sucks sorry op
biggestfan23 11
Only losers put that as a status anyway
disney_blonde 16
She's the one pathetic enough to ask people to text her on FB. I wouldn't text anyone who had that as their status.