Today, after being kept awake all night by my house-mate and his girlfriend, they woke me at the crack of dawn to apologize for being so loud. FML
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College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, my parents woke me up in the middle of the night when they got in a huge argument and started yelling at each other. I was up all night. They decided to make it up to each other. They kept me up all night again. FML
Today, I was woken up at 2 a.m. by my roommates throwing a party down the hall. I put some earplugs in so I could get some rest for my 8 a.m final. They worked really well, so well in fact that I didn't hear my alarm and woke up at noon. FML
Today, my neighbours had an extremely loud party, which began at midnight and didn't end until 6. I know this because I had a 15 minute sleep, seeing as I had to wake up at quarter past. FML
Today, I wanted to sleep in after a rough week, only to be woken up by my roommate's sex screams and the pounding of her bed against the wall. Earplugs did not help. FML
Today, I was woken up by my sister and her husband pretending to make moaning sounds in the room next to mine. I began to make moaning sounds as well to fight back. It turns out the "moaning" was actually their dogs snoring down stairs. Breakfast was awkward. FML
Today, just like every other day, I was woken up 2 hours earlier than I needed to be, by the alarm belonging to my upstairs neighbors. They won't wake up until their real alarm goes off: me, pounding the walls and yelling in frustration. FML
Today, I got a text from my neighbor complaining about my girlfriend and me being too noisy in bed. I'm at work. FML
Today, I was awoken at 3am by hotel management to tell me they received complaints about me from every room within 30 yards of mine, including from the floors above and below me. What was my crime? Snoring loud enough to rattle windows on the other side of the building. FML
Today, my roommate's extremely loud and obnoxious alarm went off six times, waking me up each time, before she finally gave up on hitting the snooze button and went back to sleep for good. FML
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
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Top comments
heartbrakej 0
well that was nice of them to apologize
Crlnprz 11
Don't lie you had a great time, you probably masturbated to them and their noises.
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Comments (112)
rattusrattus 19
And the FML Irony Award goes to...
hidrox94 5
If you were kept awake, then why did you have to be woken up?
Sirin_fml 47
Because the OP was kept awake all NIGHT. The crack of dawn is in the morning.
bullrider92 19
If they kept you up all night,how did they wake you up to apologize?
badactor009 0
Lucky for you I am here to help. Hit the easy button, we got this one in the bag. Record them next time and play it back for guests in front of them. Track down their friends and play it for everyone THEY know. Play it back on full volume when you hear them again. Create a sound file, loop it and whenever you see either of them, keep playing back the most embarrassing parts over and over and over... Play it back whenever you see one of them. Make a ring tone out of their noise and use it for them. Send their sounds to them as an attachment via email. Write down the dialog, print it and put that up, hand it out and send it to them and others via email with the attached sound file, giving them full credit for the performance. Get the picture?
heartbrakej 0
I read all of that
eminemchick 19
u call that the "easy" button?
melliemoo17 6
i didnt :)
SolemnlyLove 7
sounds like a lot of shit to go through, doubt its worth it
0pt1mus 6
Thanks for the book
jobsman99 0
she could have given you a ******** for the inconvenience. actually so could he I guess. she should have had sexual intercourse with you a few times.
badactor009 0
If you follow my previous advice, your house-mate and his girl friend will have something to write an FML about.
TKello 6
At least they tried to be polite...Don't worry though. When you get your own girlfriend you can be JUST as loud as they can. :3 Who knows, maybe you guys can host "Moaning Wars" and whoever is the loudest gets to be the one that deals with the Cops when they're called because of how noisy you two couples are being.
Sithis23 0
How did they wake you up if you were up all night? Just curious
Deathhound 27
Haha, I have to agree with Sithis23
Sweet_Testicles 7
Be happy they at least apologized