Today, I got up early in the morning to get a snack, only to walk in on my "vegan" housemate eating a turkey sandwich. This bastard harasses me every other day about my meat-eating, but all he could do after he noticed me was drop the sandwich and claim he'd been sleepwalking. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was lectured by a self-professed vegan over my "barbaric" eating habits, in between her scarfing down a tuna fish sandwich. FML
Today, my coworker brings in meat for lunch every single day and eats it at his desk. I'm a vegan and the smell makes me feel sick for hours. The management won't reprimand him or move either of us. FML
Today, my roommate decided to go vegan and threw all of MY meats, cheeses, chocolates and even beans for some reason in the trash, because he "doesn't need that kind of toxic waste" in his life. FML
Today, my roommate raged at me for "lying" about being a vegetarian, because she saw chicken stored in my side of the fridge. That chicken isn't for me, it's an ingredient in the homemade food I make for my dogs. Apparently, serving my dogs real meat instead of forcing them into vegetarianism makes me a hypocrite. FML
Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML
Today, to keep me from "getting fatter", my roommate raided the kitchen. She ate everything from cookies and ice cream to deli meat. The only thing left in the house are vegetables. FML
Today, I was outside, eating a sandwich, when I noticed a homeless man was standing in front of me. Upon making eye contact, he grabbed the rest of my sandwich and ran off. FML
Today, after weeks of me "forgetting" to buy meat and animal products, my husband asked to talk. I was hoping he was getting the hints that I wanted us to go vegan. He wanted me to get checked for early-onset dementia. FML
Today, I realized I've become a stereotypical militant vegan when I told a friend that we should start raising Lone Star ticks and dropping them around town so we could spread meat allergies and force people to eat vegan. FML
Today, my boss was hosting some client representatives for a meeting and had offered to buy everyone lunch. The "healthy" place he's ordering from made me sick last time, so I'd politely opted out. At lunch, the reps glared at me in the meeting room as I ate my homemade chili con carne. Turns out they're all vegans. FML
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Top comments
asapp78 16
Nothing to see here folks! Nothing to see...
Le_Doctor 10
Never got how people are vegan... I mean you're getting rid of bacon!
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Comments (103)
PoeticPathetic 0
In my opinion, most vegans are only in it so they can pretend they're better than people with normal diets. I've yet to meet a vegan who doesn't constantly brag about their lentil and soy diets
sikunt89_fml 16
It's probably just an act to fool you into buying all the meat and dairy he consumes. Veges are so much cheaper. On another note, opinionated vegans are so annoying. I like bacon.
jh921971 10
So the person is shit disturber.
jddrinker 6
That's why I ******* hate vegans.
martin8337 35
I have no problem with vegas just let me eat what I want and they can eat what they want and leave me be.
fucMyLifeSoHard 18
She's probably a pescatarian. Someone who eats fish, but not the flesh of other animals.
chosha_fml 26
Make good use of this. If he ever hassles you about eating meat again ask him, 'what should I be having? A nice turkey sandwich?' Hypocrite needs to be told.
skyeyez9 24
They do it cause they think giving up all meat products makes them morally superior. They (like your roommate) harass you if they see you eating meat and trying to impose their lifestyle on you by spouting how many cows are killed...etc Kind of like a politician writing laws to make prostitution wrong and impose jail time, and is himself caught with a hooker.
vikky538 28
now its your turn to harass ...go get him...
ehllychan 10
To me, being a "preachy" pescatarian is pure nonsense. You're basically saying "some animals deserve to die and other don't, and I get to choose each ones". If someone is going to stop eating meat because of animal rights, specially so if they're going to preach to others about it, I expect them to at least be true to what they preach and be completely vegan. The only reason I can see for being a pescatarian is if the meat free diet is for health purposes.
chrisstachon 30
seems legit