Awkward, Sextoys and Intimacy: Nice try, Sharon

Nice try, Sharon

By Anonymous - 23/06/2013 10:38 - United States - Fountain Valley

Today, I decided to go buy myself a dildo to use on my lonely nights. Once at the adult store, I also grabbed a birthday card to make it seem the dildo wasn't for me. At the register, the cashier looked at me and said, "For God's sake, save yourself some money. I already know it's for you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 632

You deserved it 25 569

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Same thing different taste

By Average Lover - 27/10/2018 03:00

Today, my wife and I decided to go to an adult store and buy some toys to spice up the bedroom a bit. She wanted to buy a double-edged dildo so "we can use it together". I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 724

You deserved it 747

By ghgfd - 06/03/2013 14:53 - Canada - Barrie

Today, I went to the store to pick up some feminine products. As I was paying, the male cashier looked at me sympathetically and asked if it was my girlfriend's time of the month. I'm a girl and was buying them for myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 863

You deserved it 4 424

By useless pos - 01/03/2013 00:48 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 274

You deserved it 12 351

Misunderstood

By fuck - 18/03/2015 17:40 - Netherlands

Today, I went to the store to buy some condoms. I couldn't find them anywhere, so I nervously asked a staff member for help. She scowled, pointed at the shelf directly behind me, and told me to, "Get a life. Or better pick-up lines." I'll never live down the snickers from the other customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 751

You deserved it 4 096

By Anonymous - 09/06/2013 14:29 - United States - Greenwood

Today, I went to the local pharmacy to buy some condoms. When I went to go purchase them, the elderly lady behind the counter took one look at me and said, "Honey, you're your own birth control." FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 540

You deserved it 10 545

By screwed - 04/11/2012 09:55 - United States

Today, my hubby and I decided to spice up our sex life and went to an adult toy store. We know too many people in our town, so we drove to one that was 30 mins away. We decided on our items, and went to the check out. Who would have guessed my next door neighbor works there as a cashier? FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 702

You deserved it 5 452

Are you lost?

By Anonymous - 16/08/2015 15:22 - United States

Today, while I was working at a children's toy store, a woman walked in, looked around a bit, then asked if we sold dildos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 180

You deserved it 1 779

By imustbegay - 09/05/2010 14:20 - United States

Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 349

You deserved it 10 394

By secretdeo - 24/08/2009 04:48 - United States

Today, I was at the store buying some feminine products. At the cash register, the clerk said to me "Dude, you know those are for girls right?" I am a 30 year old woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 470

You deserved it 5 354

The Customer Is Clueless

By Conner Johnson - 28/11/2017 05:00

Today, a customer walked up to me with a dog toy and said, "I knew one-stop shopping was a thing, but I didn't know you guys carried dildos." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 180

You deserved it 285

ladybuglet 22

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:00

Instead of buying a card, use the money on extra batteries.

DocBastard 38

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:00

Why do people bother trying to lie like this? You think you're the first girl to buy a *****? It's like the guy who buy a Penthouse and condoms. "No, the Penthouse is for my, uh, girlfriend. She likes the articles."

Comments

Druu 53

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:05

I bet the cashier's comment rubbed you the wrong way!

cottoncandymango 17

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:06

That's one awesome cashier.

KBurns207 17

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:07

Hahaha I'm sorry but that's still kinda funny. I would laugh at her calling me out

ravenh1979 13

Sunday 23 June 2013 20:32

Lol..

Bigger_than_Jesu 5

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:07

You shouldn't have spent two hours picking your ***** out...

SamanthaNGoree 10

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:07

Who cares if you use a *****. Any woman who isn't getting amazing sex he never she wants it, probably has one.

Shenannigoats 16

Monday 24 June 2013 1:57

...why is this getting thumbed down? She's right.

SamanthaNGoree 10

Monday 24 June 2013 5:57

Whenever*

revolution4ever 14

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:09

They were just looking out for you op! Honestly, they see people buy stuff for themselves everyday. There's no reason for you to be embarrassed.

Pleonasm 35

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:09

Just say you're building an elaborate birthday cake. The guys get hookers in theirs, so uh, why can't girls get big surprises too? Maybe blow some special candles, maybe a giant pop-out one, maybe even a cake made only of ******: who knows! But it's someone's special day, right?

graceinsheepwear 33

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:58

"blow some special candles"? Those ARE special! Great Freudian typo 23!

Iceman225 11

Monday 24 June 2013 1:47

yeah... blow....

NavalAvaiations1 5

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:11

internet shopping OP... saves the embarrassment.

Epikouros 31

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:28

Yes, but be careful what size you buy when it's your first ***** :)

perdix 29

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:21

Sex-shop workers are trained professionals -- they know the stank of desperation ain't coming off the merchandise;)

graceinsheepwear 33

Sunday 23 June 2013 20:00

uh, I don't think they are trained professionals. more like people willing to work till 2 am amongst lube and anal beads.

perdix 29

Sunday 23 June 2013 22:55

#48, just being facetious. The last time I went to the sex shop, I would have bet that the guy working there was a virgin! A virgin who didn't mind being surrounded by lube, anal beads and multi-headed ******.

Cazz91 21

Sunday 23 June 2013 23:44

There are sex shops open until 2am? Hot damn, I better visit the town or city that has those hours because ours is only open until 8pm all through out the week... Except Valentines day, they are open until 10pm.