Sex, Awkward, Cute and Intimacy: My little buddy

My little buddy

By Anonymous - 18/08/2009 05:37 - United States

Today, I walked in on my husband in our room completely naked. At first I thought he was waiting for me so we could have sex. He hadn't seen me yet, so I started to undress too to surprise him. Then I saw that he had drawn a face on his penis and he was talking to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 102

You deserved it 6 492

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Same thing different taste

By chewybarseventy - 24/08/2010 06:17 - United States

Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 487

You deserved it 11 065

Buzzing the tower

By Princess ? - 12/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was taking a shower when my husband suddenly came in naked. I thought we were gonna have some fun, and so tried to be sexy. He took a quick shower and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 141

You deserved it 279

By left out wet - 22/06/2019 22:08

Today, I was laying in bed completely naked, uncovered and waiting for my husband to walk in. He laid down in bed and starting playing with his phone instead of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 713

You deserved it 233

By Anonymous - 30/01/2015 20:16 - United States

Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 175

You deserved it 4 500

Surprised indeed

By fredo - 19/03/2013 12:31 - United States - Ames

Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 046

You deserved it 24 088

By Hunterxx - 07/08/2010 05:21 - United States

Today, my husband thought it'd be funny to trigger the alarm in the house while I was sleeping. Shocked, I ran outside naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 754

You deserved it 7 228

Classic Dave

By Sarahir - 29/04/2020 05:00

Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating into the kitchen sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 187

You deserved it 390

By Anonymous - 13/03/2010 09:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 750

You deserved it 10 094

By Mrs. Ned - 09/09/2015 02:00 - United States - Incline Village

Today, I walked in on my husband having sex with the shower wall. When I got in the shower with him he immediately went soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 898

You deserved it 3 081

By stillhungry - 27/06/2015 18:37 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boyfriend called me while I was at work. He sounded very excited and told me he had a surprise for me. He doesn't usually do this kind of thing, so I was excited. When I came home, I found him naked, with "Bone Appetite" written right above his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 509

You deserved it 3 978

Violet_Illuser 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 17:21

I'm sorry, I'm not seeing how this is "ew." I'm laughing too damn hard.

DameGreyWulf 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 20:11

Hello there, Richard. We hear you're going to go spend the night your girlfriend, miss Pusé. Is that true? Oh, how scandalous~!

Comments

teach09 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 17:29

ohh myyy...that sucks... but it's kinda funny at the same time... sry...FYL

netbeui435 3

Tuesday 18 August 2009 17:31

he's a keeper.

violetsun 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 18:06

I agree.

amstillives 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 17:31

YDI for having a husband that talks to his 2 inch penis.. BiTCH...

fireball2723 0

Wednesday 15 February 2012 5:24

Your a douche

DevineLegacy 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 17:32

awkard! FYL for sure, thats just strange

sumdoode123 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 17:32

The naked Man, It does work. Anyone seen that episode of "How i Met Your Mother" Man thats too funny.

RESTAREA 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 20:19

Haha, win. It always works, you just have to choose your pose xD

N00d13s 0

Wednesday 19 August 2009 3:30

Not always, 2 out of 3 times.

Snackbars 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 17:34

He's a keeper. For sure.

Juggalokid420 1

Tuesday 18 August 2009 17:37

that's hilarious i would definitely give it a try... why not right?

Slim_Shady16 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 17:38

pwned... hahaha

dotsdesu 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 17:56

he's convincing it it's not a little baby carrot and is a strong healthy beanstalk.

kat0ria 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 18:00

lol awwwkkkward. xD

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I brought my daughter to work with me. When we walked in, a client was blowing up at my boss, all because as my boss was walking past his storage unit, he glanced in and was about to compliment how neat it was. After my boss left, I had to deal with the aftermath, which left my daughter terrified of this man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 329

You deserved it 84

Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 608

You deserved it 5 760

The Top

Today, I had a substitute teacher for my dance class. I noticed at one point, he took out a camera. The principal came in, everyone was going crazy, and the teacher was dragged out of the classroom. He was taking videos and pictures of us dancing. Turns out he was a registered sex offender. FML

I agree, your life sucks 111 715

You deserved it 5 355

Today, my friend asked why I always smell like a dead animal carcass. I have no idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 179

You deserved it 7 906

Today, I ran sound for my ex's wedding rehearsal since I was the only sound tech in town. Her dad was late for the rehearsal, so the pastor had me to walk her down the aisle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 772

You deserved it 3 987

Today, my fiancée and I were making plans for our wedding when my soon-to-be mother-in-law chimed in with, "You know, she can still get out of this. I got the dress for her but we can save it for the next guy." I'm not sure if she's joking or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 678

You deserved it 2 485

Today, I found my car completely vandalized when I came home from work. A paper on the seat read "That's for what you did to Hannah you fuck". Hannah? FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 445

You deserved it 2 017

Today, my hours at work were slashed due to company wide cut backs. The only coworker unaffected was the asshat who stole my promotion after I'd trained them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 786

You deserved it 214