Time to bail

By Anonymous - 26/12/2022 18:00 - United States

Spicy
Today, I spent $900 for a 2-hour private room session at a strip club, simply to sit, talk, and cuddle (nothing sexual). I'm "happily" married, but my love language is physical touch. I love soft and gentle affection and my wife hates it. I'm already planning to go back. FML
I agree, your life sucks 1 555
You deserved it 774

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Agreed. At this point I’m genuinely wondering why OP even bothers to stay married if he’s clearly feeling miserable. Whatever the divorce will cost, surely it can’t be worse than being stuck in this situation?

Comments

I get that, went to a strip club only once and found it can be can nice to have nonsexual physical contact w/o the strings and the drama of a relationship. lesson cost me $50. Though even at $50 a pop it's far from a sustainable solution.

Just attach the 900 dollars to your body and tell the wife she can keep it if she removes it without using her fingers. That way everyone's happy.

if your love languages are so different and incompatible, you shouldn't have married in the first place. you should've realised this as a serious relationship problem long before the first thought of proposing came up.

Agreed. At this point I’m genuinely wondering why OP even bothers to stay married if he’s clearly feeling miserable. Whatever the divorce will cost, surely it can’t be worse than being stuck in this situation?

This is one of the reasons I'm an advocate of pre-marriage counseling. You got to know this kind of stuff before committing to marriage.

You didn't even get a handjob out of the deal? That's disappointing.

tiptoppc 19

There’s a new type of therapy emerging for this. Look into it. Touch or sensory therapy is a professional environment with strict boundaries set, that helps with things like this. An example would be cuddle therapy

I feel like a marriage counselor would be more affordable and could help you guys find a compromise but...is the club hiring?

To be honest, I suggest:… (1) Save the money and see a divorce attorney so you understand the most probable costs and options. Usually the first consultation is free… (2) Find a therapist who can help you understand why you have put up with such an unfulfilling marriage that you would spend so much money on what should be available within a normal relationship… I feel sorry for OP. God knows that many of us have one day realized that our relationship isn’t working and then are unclear on what to do about it. It comes down to “Is this relationship repairable?” My impression from what was written is that this is an ongoing problem and wife is unwilling or unable to compromise. She has rights too, but not all relationships work. Staying in a relationship that you have tried to make better but isn’t going anywhere isn’t good for anyone.

A while back, I heard there was such a thing as professional cuddlers. Are they still around, or did everyone think that was as absurd as I did?

I think I remember something like professional cuddlers, but I think it was in Japan.

tiptoppc 19

Touch Therapy. A friend of mine is one such professional. Also helps with touch aversion, and hyper sensitivity on touch (like I am)

It's a thing in the US. Just googled my city and seems like it's mainly freelancers, charging about $100 an hour. Though I can't imagine being in a relationship and not getting cuddles, would be a deal breaker in the dating phase for me. That's a tough situation.