MMA FML

By ThatEndedWell - 07/01/2019 22:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I decided to challenge the jerk jock at work to a fight, since he kept poking fun at me for being a weakling. Having started taking MMA classes, I was confident I'd make him eat his words. Just my luck, he's an MMA instructor and kicked my ass effortlessly. Not what I had planned. FML
I agree, your life sucks 1 151
You deserved it 4 536

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Top comments

whiskey'swino 15

Fighting at work can get you fired. Running your mouth off and getting your ass whooped will get you laughed out the building. Which is worse? You fucked your own life here, more ways than one.

Jocks and fights? Is this a workplace or a high school?

Comments

chessu 21

Not only did you challenge someone to a fight, you did it so without even doing a basic background check on him. I mean - if he looks like a jock he's probably been working out for a while to look like that. 100% deserved it.

HR should have an anti bullying policy. You are adults now OP. You need to go through them.

So what are we gonna see next, you challenging him to a rematch, then a Rocky-esque montage of you training your ass off, and when that's over, you two duking it out to a very 80s soundtrack, and finally, his girlfriend or wife swoons over you and when she comes to, she leaves him for you, and you two live happily ever after while he falls into a state of depression, loses his current job, becomes an alcoholic, and works a new deadend job?

“I decided to challenge —“ YDI.

IrieStorm 9

Work? Sounds more like a high school.

You having taken classes (or started taking classes) makes this so much worse. You don't EVER use things like that outside of the ring. Any martial arts school will (and should) kick you out immediately when they hear about that.

You should have gone full anchor man with him

Should’ve countered.

Dude I was with you till you said “Started MMA” then it’s YDI. First if he’s that much of douche bag unless you cripple him significantly he will escalate if you win. If you lose you will never live it down guessing you know this now. As much fun as permanently crippling him would be you WILL get sued and you WILL lose. You did pick the fight. Second and this is on your instructor. There is MMA and then there is street fighting. If your instructor did not drill this into you from day 1 then he’s doing it wrong. MMA is a SPORT street fighting is two or more animals trying to kill each other. MMA you joint lock an opponent till the other person submits. Street fight you break or dislocate the joint and move on. Third if you know enough to win you also know that avoiding the fight is a better choice. No matter how fit or trained you are one bad hit and you can be in a wheel chair shitting into a diaper. It takes a lot less than you think to break shit that don’t heal. I know enough sports men and women that have crippling career ending injuries in the ring never mind street fights.

Seriously. I hope you're a teenager because you certainly sound like one. ydi