Today, I finally gained the nerve to ask out the girl of my dreams. She responded by saying, "You need to lower your standards." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally got the guts to ask out my crush. She said yes and I was really happy. Then I woke up. FML
Today, I finally built up the courage to confess my love to the girl of my dreams. She turned me down. When I asked her about all the recent receptive behavior toward me, she replied, "I thought it'd be funny." FML
Today, I finally went on a date with a girl I've been talking to for 2 years. She is my dream girl, picture perfect and I love her with all my heart. So I asked her, half jokingly, if I was her dream guy. Her reply? "Don't ask me something you don't want to hear the answer of." FML
Today, I finally got the courage to ask out the girl I’ve had a crush on for years. I was so nervous, I got confused and sent her a text meant for my best friend that said, "I’m about to ask her out. Pray I don’t puke on her." She responded with a laughing emoji and said, "You really need to work on your game." FML
Today, after three weeks of putting it off, I decided to ask out the girl I've had a major crush on since third grade. When I told her, she smiled, but then quickly said, "But aren't you gay?" FML
Today, I asked the girl I am in love with out on a date. She asked me for my name. FML
Today, I finally got up the nerve to ask this really cute girl out I've had a crush on for over eight months. Turns out she isn't a girl. FML
Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML
Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He's smart, attractive, and has a steady job. Imagine my surprise when he accepted. Then imagine my surprise when he followed up with, "Hah, just kidding. You're fucking BORING!" FML
Today, I finally worked up the courage to ask out the girl I like. After nervously fumbling through my words, I asked, "Want to grab a cup of water sometime?" She looked at me confused, then asked if I meant coffee. FML
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Top comments
Daddymo 14
I think you need to raise your standards to include pretty girls that aren't also bitches.
Roxxxxay 13
They say girls go for bad boys but on FML it seems all the boys fall for the biggest bitches.
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Comments (179)
izzy7 11
Don't you dare lower your standards OP. She's already at the bottom. You deserve a girl that's not such a bitch.
PrincessPesa 20
This chick needs to be slapped in the face with a big ol' helping of 'if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all'! It's so uncool to tell someone what they "need" to do- especially when they're putting themselves out on a limb. She sounds like a real piece of work.
laden_swallow09 35
Nah. Just another piece of ass. She certainly isn't good for any conversation.
tzhiting93 3
Ouch, what a bitch. Remember not all girls are arrogant like her!
Toonz321 4
Pinkpie do you have kik ? Or email? Plz
hotPinklipstick 24
This isn't a dating site. If you want that type of information from someone send it in a personal message.
KuchkaNumberOne 2
She's a bitch. On to the next one!
Pandacupcakelove 26
Well atleast now you know she's the queen of all bitches and you can stop wasting your precious time on this girl.
day624 14
Im sure bitch isnt in your description of dream girl OP.. Dont worry you'll find someone
HahaYDI 0
I'm sure that's a typical response at my high school. It's instances like that that made me afraid to approach women when I was younger lol. I'm hoping girls like that are less common in college.
laden_swallow09 35
Don't worry, they are. Bitches like that usually go back home and live with their parents for the rest of their insignificant existence. Be mindful, though, of the reason the girls that /do/ go to college have a reason to be there… to get out of college, preferably with a degree. Study dates usually work. ;)
joeymo304 9
She can't be the girl of your dreams with a personality like that!
Cowboy1986 4
U should said if its that good eat it yourself