Today, I was giving a friend a neck rub when she started to breathe heavily. I figured she was getting into it, so I started kissing her neck. She then turned around and said, "Tell my roommate I'm having an asthma attack." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was giving a friend a neck rub when she started to breathe heavily. I figured she was getting into it, so I started kissing her neck. She then turned around and said, "Tell my roommate I'm having an asthma attack." FML
Today, I learned that my girlfriend is terrified of me seeing her sex faces, so she violently squished my face between her boobs during sex. I then had a severe asthma attack because I couldn't breathe properly. FML
Today, I was having sex with a guy that I just met, and when I thought he was about to orgasm, he actually had an asthma attack. FML
Today, I saw my friend across campus, and I decided that I wanted to play a trick on her and scare her from behind. Turns out, I scared a complete stranger with really bad panic induced asthma. FML
Today, I had an asthma attack while in bed with my boyfriend. He interrupted my desperate coughing only to tell me to shut up. He then rolled over to go back to sleep. FML
Today, I asked a girl I like out. She ended up having an asthma attack because she was laughing so hard. I guess that's a no. FML
Today, I was rubbing one out in the shower. I guess I got a little too excited, because as I came close to climaxing, I had a serious asthma attack and had to wheeze for help. FML
Today, I had phone sex with my boyfriend. He had an asthma attack. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. As I started getting close to having my first ever orgasm, I got extremely short of breath and started hyperventilating. His reaction was to cover my mouth to shut me up. FML
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Top comments
MEGAJOSH 0
So you kiss people's necks when they breathe heavily? Creepy.
dol567 0
Just a 'friend'? Hope she's OK
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Comments (88)
AcessDenied 0
Dude. Not only are you an idiot. You got burnt severely for it. Don't go kissin' friends necks, that's just disgusting. Friend with benefits is one thing. Chick that you're friends with? I'd have stabbed you with an epi-pen. Get your head out of the gutter yo. Shouldn't have been gettin' all frisky in the first place.
tutuluzer5968 0
Um the OP was also a girl. Neck rubs are sexually arousing though.
mzmaverickd 7
haha # 11... Also if she was just a friend yea you are kinda creepy. If she wanted you, she would have given you something more to go on than breathing heavily...
McFinder 0
yikes
greatnt249 0
Dude, if you can't tell the difference between aroused breathing and wheezing, you need to get out more. That, and quit watching so much ****; that's about the only place the stunt you pulled would have worked.
Leviathan_fml 0
when in doubt, whip it out
that_band_nerd 22
So other bands do say that!! I didn't know if it was just ours!
zeldagirl77 7
Op is a girl.....
youliftmeup 0
HAHAHA. This is awful, but made me laugh...I feel bad for the guy still...
KimberlyAngelaaa 0
hahahahahahahahhaaaaaa awwwwwww i feel bad for you. thats prettyy akwardd if you ask me
802_CRU 0
that sucks. apparently she's more than a friend to you.
kicksblaza429 1
hahahaha @ 26
alex_vik 1
Wait, you started sexually kissing your friend? You're sick.