Love: Jealousy - FML

Jealousy

By jake - 10/01/2021 18:02 - United States - Denver

Today, my girlfriend demanded that I delete all my female contacts or she’d set my stuff on fire. Yes, that includes my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 084

You deserved it 259

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Same thing different taste

Unreasonable

By Whipped af - 05/10/2023 01:30

Today, my wife forced me to delete a female friend’s number off my phone because she’s jealous of our friendship. She then showed me a demonstration of what will happen if I contact her again, with a photo she got from her Facebook, gasoline, and a match to “make sure we understand each other.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 824

You deserved it 219

Tindersticks

By noluckthere - 10/09/2021 02:01

Today, my girlfriend dumped me and set all my stuff on fire. Why? Because she found my Tinder account. I haven’t even used it since I met her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 908

You deserved it 398

By DCarreon - 04/10/2012 07:13 - United States - Ceres

Today, my seemingly normal girlfriend decided to erase every girl's name out of my phone. Family and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 329

You deserved it 3 264

By NowImSingle - 12/02/2018 19:00

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and threw all my stuff out into the yard because she caught me "texting another woman". Guess it didn't matter to her that the contact name was "Mom". FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 510

You deserved it 417

By mommydearest - 04/09/2011 16:08 - Denmark

Today, my paranoid wreck of a girlfriend read a text message on my phone from a woman asking if I was coming over for dinner. The woman was my mom. My girlfriend stormed out and hasn't answered my calls all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 338

You deserved it 4 123

Unreasonable demands

By Anonymous - 12/06/2021 06:01

Today, my girlfriend was mad I have so many female contacts in my phone and demanded I delete some of them. Two thirds of them are blood relatives, the rest are coworkers, and one is a friend I’ve known since primary school, who is dying of a brain tumour. Which exactly should I delete? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 122

You deserved it 132

Crazy ex

By Anonymous - 30/06/2023 10:00

Today, my girlfriend came up to me to ask me to have access to my Google account, just so she could delete all my photos then break up with me, saying I was in the wrong. She thought it was disrespectful for me to have a life outside of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 870

You deserved it 125

New saying just dropped

By Evan - 10/10/2022 15:30 - United States

Today, my new girlfriend demanded that I delete all my female friends' numbers. Her rationale is, “When them bitches are going through some shit, a shoulder to cry on becomes a dick to ride on.” When I refused, she promptly dumped me because she doesn’t "need a potential cheater” in her life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 542

You deserved it 219

Get out

By Leave me alone, bitch!!! - 20/11/2021 02:00

Today, I found out that my mother changed all the locks of the house and threw away all of my girlfriend's stuff. I don't know what the fuck happened there. I actually bought the house two years ago because I had enought of her being nosey and controlling with both of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 640

You deserved it 125

Overreaching

By Entitled parents suck. - 12/10/2022 10:00

Today, my mother threatened to disown me if I didn't break up with my tattooed girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 912

You deserved it 144

Next

Top comments

BurnInDemonFire 34

Monday 11 January 2021 5:07

You deleted your relationship instead, right?

Charlie Given 26

Monday 11 January 2021 3:51

pack your shit time to go run far far away

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 11 January 2021 2:19

She'd set your mother on fire?

Brightside86 30

Monday 11 January 2021 2:44

If you think this has a happy ending, then you haven't been paying attention

Charlie Given 26

Monday 11 January 2021 3:51

pack your shit time to go run far far away

ghostinflames 13

Monday 11 January 2021 4:41

That seems pretty extreme, are you sure she doesn't mean the ones that hold a flame for you? Does she wake up everyday in dread that you're gonna hurt her feelings again or give another girl the thought that she has a chance with you? If it's just that she's possessive and isn't truely in love with you, cutting ties will be worth it to be free.

BurnInDemonFire 34

Monday 11 January 2021 5:07

You deleted your relationship instead, right?

sarahcroy20 12

Monday 11 January 2021 5:20

Why would you want to be with someone like that?

Bogrbon 27

Monday 11 January 2021 6:14

This had better be followed by “today I left my now-ex-girlfriend and even did the favor of introducing her to some nice police officers for domestic abuse.”

kittycatkelss 29

Monday 11 January 2021 6:25

Dude, run!

mccuish 25

Monday 11 January 2021 9:04

GET THE HELL OUT. That is a huge red flag

red6joker 8

Monday 11 January 2021 14:23

that's a pretty big red flag. when they are crazy possessive like that it will only end bad. you need to get out before that happens.

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The Top

Today, my husband was eating me out when he suddenly lifted up my hips and started licking my asshole. I screamed for him to stop, since it was disgusting. I don't think I can ever have sex again. I can't believe I married someone who would do that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68

You deserved it 209

Today, I spent hours cooking an amazing dinner for my family, who had just gotten home from a trip, so we could spend some time together because I'd started to miss everyone. When they got home, they saw it all laid out and just took plates to their room, without even telling me they were home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 273

You deserved it 2 515

The Top

Today, my violin broke and I have a recital coming up. I gave it to my friend to give it to the luthier and the luthier has fixed it. I asked my friend to return it to me and they became angry I was asking for too many favours. My recital is tomorrow and I can't get my hands on a violin for at least another week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 904

You deserved it 277

Today, at my grandmother's funeral there was a fight about inheritance. It was my teenage daughters arguing about what they get when I die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 896

You deserved it 3 045

Today, a stranger told me how proud he was that my boyfriend and I were so open with our sexuality. For the past three years, most strangers have thought we are a pair of gay men. I am a woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 941

You deserved it 7 629

Today, the guy I've been dating tells me that I need to stop hanging on him in public because it's ruining his game with other girls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 301

You deserved it 6 085

Today, all of my roommates handed in their vacating notice unexpectedly. They are all moving to a new house together in two weeks, leaving me to be either homeless or forced to pay 4 times what I was paying in rent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 909

You deserved it 4 191

Today, my son had a screaming meltdown because I told him to clean his own room and that I refuse to be treated like his personal maid. He’s 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 943

You deserved it 370