u raised him
In on it
Today, my 17-year-old son attempted to rob the bank I work at while I was off shift. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
female
Today, my nineteen-year-old son attempted to mug me. With a screwdriver. FML
fuck
United States
Today, I got to see my son's dream of being on television come true. Unfortunately, it was because he'd been arrested for trying to rob a bank. FML
Anonymous
Dumbass
Today, my son is an idiot, but I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt by giving him a job as a cashier in one of my stores. Within half an hour, I was sent security footage from that store's manager showing my son on his phone, ignoring customers, picking his nose, and stealing money from the till. FML
great
Hamilton, New Zealand
Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML
Anonymous
I can't deal with confrontation
Today, my son is so pathetic that when a tiny, unarmed 5-foot tall female thief robbed our store, he didn’t grab the baseball bat, he didn’t slam the anti-theft door on the counter closed, he didn’t even press the big alarm button, he just started crying, put his hands up, and let her empty the till. FML
Anonymous
Statham, United States
Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, a customer at work made threats against me and my two-month old son. Instead of following policy by notifying the police, my manager apologized to him and told me to leave. FML
NotYourDaddy
Today, my 17-year-old employee accidentally called me "Dad". We all got a good laugh from it and went on with our days. Later, after getting her some coins for her cash drawer, she playfully said, "Thanks, Daddy." The customer she was serving? My wife. FML
emmalou
Little shit
Today, my son tried extort me into turning the WiFi back on by hiding my purse. He was mad because he'd lost access for being disrespectful. FML
Pxuccy
Caught in 4K
Today, I was robbed while working overnight at the gas station. They demanded I give them all the cash in the register. Seeing they were armed, I was reduced to tears and complied. They mocked me and took a video with their cellphone. When I told my boss, he promptly fired me for not “fighting back.” FML
Top comments
ajh1800 25
And that's when you said "Dont call the cops, call an ambulance cause I'm about to kick his ass!", right?
manb91uk 22
I think he might have misunderstood the concept of ‘Bank of Mum and Dad’ somewhat don’t you think?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (16)
leeloo7 22
Was he holding a gun? Or was he trying to jiujitsu the money out of them?
unintended_consequence 5
I think the job may have been relative