By Anonymous - 24/9/2019 06:00 - United States - Los Angeles

I'm sitting right here

Today, I got my nails done at a salon where everyone working there was Vietnamese. During my manicure, the manicurists talked about how ugly I was in their native tongue. They couldn't have known that I'd lived in Vietnam and I'm fluent in Vietnamese, but too chickenshit to speak up. FML

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Keep the peace

The cheek of some people

Deep-seated resentment

By Anonymous - 1/7/2016 22:35 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I saw my ex best friend and my cheating ex-girlfriend hanging out at the gym, where I work. They signed up here just to piss me off. It's working. FML

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By mishyb - 28/7/2013 04:28 - United States - Englewood

Today, my horse farted and scared itself, then ran all the way up the hill and wouldn't stop until I fell off. FML

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By Anonymous - 12/2/2013 18:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartment has one bathroom. FML

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By diorlove - 21/1/2010 22:17 - France

Today, I broke my wrist because a Nutella glass fell on it after I opened the cupboard. FML

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By Anonymous - 29/3/2011 23:58 - Canada

Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML

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By southernpride93 - 18/11/2011 15:26 - United States

Today, I was involved in a car accident and hit my head on the dash. I now have huge, very sore knot on my head. My boyfriend now takes every opportunity to poke it and scream "Look! A baby unicorn!" FML

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By stuckathome - 11/3/2010 05:30 - United States

Today, I was awoken by a conversation my mom was having with my dog upstairs. She was telling my dog that a ghost lives in our house. She was completely serious. The ghost even has a name and a backstory. FML

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By anonymous - 14/7/2015 17:28 - United States - Ridgeland

Today, a woman left our first date just because I didn't like the same character as her on a TV show. FML

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By ThatEndedWell - 7/1/2019 22:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I decided to challenge the jerk jock at work to a fight, since he kept poking fun at me for being a weakling. Having started taking MMA classes, I was confident I'd make him eat his words. Just my luck, he's an MMA instructor and kicked my ass effortlessly. Not what I had planned. FML

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By blegh - 16/1/2009 04:57 - Switzerland

Today, I reached for my beer and took a huge swallow before I realized that I had picked up my friend's tobacco spit cup. "Vomit" is not a strong enough word to describe what happened next. FML

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By addie19 - 19/1/2010 19:25 - United States

Today, I found out the antibiotics I'm taking can cause you to vomit unexpectedly. In the car. While driving. To work. FML

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By spongebob squarepants - 28/2/2018 01:30

Today, I rear-ended someone while trying to watch my odometer hit 80,000 miles. FML

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By Anonymous - 18/9/2014 07:32 - Australia - Rosebery

Today, my girlfriend visited my restaurant with some guy I'd never seen before. She introduced him to me as her "new boyfriend". She was always a cold bitch, but I never saw this coming. I had to serve their food while choking back tears, and I couldn't work up the nerve to spit in it. FML

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By UnluckyTeen - 22/10/2009 11:29 - Singapore

Today, I went to retrieve my stolen wallet from the train station. After I collected it, I returned to the place where I parked my bike to find that my bike had been stolen. FML

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By maruskasommers - 9/1/2012 09:39 - Czech Republic

Today, I came home with a friend to find my mom scratching my dad's butt with a fork. FML

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By skichick54 - 24/8/2011 05:28 - United States

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

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By The Corner Of Death - 12/8/2013 08:17 - United States - Spring

Today, my dog died. In the same kitchen corner that two of my other dogs have died. I have a "Corner Of Death" in my kitchen. FML

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By whosurdaddy - 6/1/2017 06:44

Today, I'm attending a party where drunken women just can't seem to keep their clothes on. Those drunken women are my daughters. FML

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By Anonymous - 6/8/2019 18:00

Today, I came home from work and turned on the computer. I logged onto Facebook and saw I had a bunch of notifications. Turns out, everyone on Facebook knew I was single before I did. FML

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By financially_wreckd - 21/12/2014 00:53

Today, thanks to some asswipe drunk driver fleeing the cops the wrong way down a one-way street, I've now had my third wreck this year. My insurance premium's now higher than Bob Marley in a weed factory. FML

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By Anonymous - 11/7/2015 02:42 - United States

Today, my psycho ex girlfriend got up in my face after I dumped her. She said I'm going to pay and that one day, when I think I'm safe and happy, my joy will turn to ash in my mouth. When I pointed out she'd just ripped off a Game of Thrones quote, she kneed me in the balls. FML

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By riptoofie - 16/1/2010 21:36 - United States

Today, I found my beloved hamster, Toofie. Toofie escaped from his cage. 4 years ago. FML

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By djkimmaz - 3/12/2011 11:23 - United Kingdom

Today, my mom, who is relatively new to Facebook, posted on her friend's wall, telling her about her recent diagnosis of vaginal thrush. She assumed that her wall post was private. Six of my friends liked the post. FML

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By WakeUpToADream - 25/9/2015 20:43 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my girlfriend is as punctual as a German train; I woke up to see her taking a dump into a plastic bag in our bedroom, all because my roommate was using the bathroom and she had to leave for work on time. FML

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By phuckbukket7 - 27/4/2014 22:08 - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a fancy restaurant for her birthday. I'd arranged beforehand for some of the staff to come out and sing happy birthday to her, but it all backfired when she started panicking and had a serious anxiety attack from all the attention. FML

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By Sparks - 27/4/2019 10:00 - United States - Taylor

Today, my neighbors threatened to sue me because a six-foot branch fell off one of my trees and into their yard, hitting nothing on the way down. FML

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By notimpressed - 26/4/2011 19:25 - United Kingdom

Today, a kid with severe Down's came into my workplace, as he does every day. He's has an obsession with me, sitting at a table, staring and taking photos of me all day. His parents have no problem with this, because they think it's a miracle that he can focus so much attention on me for so long. FML

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By Anonymous - 24/11/2018 09:30 - United States - Henderson

Today, I decided to take a relaxing shower. My face mask made my face break out in hives. While exfoliating, my nipples became chafed. Then I slipped and cut myself while shaving. FML

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By clumsy - 10/3/2017 20:00 - United States - Stafford

Today, I slipped and fell on a piece of plastic. I thought nothing of it until I went to the doctor's and found out that I fractured and dislocated my kneecap. I'm now in a full leg brace and crutches. Prom is five days away. FML

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By deven - 29/8/2009 22:58 - United States

Today, I saw a fight so I went over to try and break it up. Someone thought I wanted to join in, so he gave me an unexpected whap in the happy sacks, and I also got a bloody nose for my troubles. FML

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By Anonymous - 30/10/2011 16:57 - United States

Today, I was called ugly and viciously ridiculed by a couple of teenage girls. They were wearing uggs and vests that made them look like a freak-show of bleached pomeranians. FML

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By NickDrakeFan - 29/10/2013 01:57 - United States

Today, I overcame my stage fright and got up in front of a café audience with my acoustic guitar to sing a few of my songs. Some asshat kept yelling stuff like "NEEDS MORE COWBELL!" and "FREEBIRD!", which made me lose my nerve and flee. FML

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By married an old man - 5/3/2013 17:57 - United States - Rancho Mirage

Today, I decided to come onto my husband to switch things up. When I started kissing and trying to undress him, he pushed me off, saying "What're you doing? Jeopardy's about to start." FML

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By who knows - 5/2/2020 14:00 - United States - Mankato

Tell me the reason

Today, someone took my phone away. Why? Because I was texting my ex-boyfriend who cheated on me with one of my friends. FML

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By CatLover<3 - 18/6/2013 23:27 - United States - Cibolo

Today, I tried to explain to my cat why I was single, but then I realized why. FML

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By Anizzaf - 27/1/2009 17:44 - United States

Today, I picked up my cat and it went wild because I didn't know he was sleeping. I ended with with several cuts, and one on my wrist. Later a kid in my high school saw my wrist and told my guidance counselor who told my parents. Now everyone thinks I'm either a liar, attention whore, or emo. FML

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By vintage_vogue - 17/6/2009 04:52 - United States

Today, I had a coffee date. The guy was waiting with coffee to meet me on the patio. I walked up to him, caught my favorite pendant necklace on the table, broke the necklace trying to get it free, and rattled the table so intensely that the guy's coffee spilled all over him. FML

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By Chey1309 - 29/6/2010 03:19 - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend if I looked alright for our date. He said, "Honey, you look fine, just don't go out in public like that." FML

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By YOURMOM - 31/12/2011 07:24 - United States

Today, I was at the park feeding nuts to some squirrels. One fell down my shirt and the next thing I know I'm being attacked by a squirrel that looked like it was on steroids. FML

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By AH - 7/9/2009 18:16 - United States

Today, I told my parents that all I wanted for my 18th birthday was to go to a restaurant in NYC for a nice dinner. My parents denied me saying that it would cost too much money. I come home today to see my parents had bought a huge plasma screen TV for $800. We already have 3 tv's. FML

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Top comments

By Ashamed_Sister | 60

#7845964 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 6:42

You should have said goodbye in Vietnamese or maybe something like "goodbye you ugly bitches".

By Sady_Ct | 37

#7845995 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 9:13

Put in a complaint, either written or verbal but definitely in Vietnamese. It doesn’t matter who you are or what service you are receiving, no one deserves to be treated this badly.

COMMENTS

By Enyer Delgado | 7

#7845960 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 6:05

Reminds me of that time in school some Dominican kids were talking about me in spanish thinking I cant understand them even though im Dominican myself. Then told them I can understand them amd they said that they were just joking.

By Ashamed_Sister | 60

#7845964 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 6:42

You should have said goodbye in Vietnamese or maybe something like "goodbye you ugly bitches".

By blondie45 | 21

#7845973 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 7:54

Smile and wave with your pretty new nails! They’re just jealous because you can afford to have your nails done whilst they will always just be nail technicians. And what do you care what a bunch of small mind bitches think of you anyway!

By Sady_Ct | 37

#7845995 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 9:13

Put in a complaint, either written or verbal but definitely in Vietnamese. It doesn’t matter who you are or what service you are receiving, no one deserves to be treated this badly.

By skippydoda | 32

#7846013 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 11:10

Should have said you like the color in Vietnamese.

By RichardPencil | 28

#7846026 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 12:52

Next time, bring Frank Costanza with you. He'd tell them what's what, ha!

By j2quared | 1

#7846031 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 13:05

i hope you didn't leave a tip

By Sinshine | 27

#7846036 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 13:29

It sucks to be treated like that but if you paid any kind of money for that treatment, that's on you.

Reply

KaD6 | 23

#7846073 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 15:48

It was probably halfway done by the time she heard them.

Reply

chyiochan | 30

#7846154 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 23:12

They meant that OP shouldn't have paid at all. All Mani-Pedi places I've been is that you pay after, as you also tip people like that too. OP should have explained in Viet at the counter when it was completed.

By AmbrosiaFan | 18

#7846067 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 15:29

As you leave say thank you for your service but I won't be coming here again in their native tongue.

By bl3ur0z3 | 17

#7846070 - Tuesday 24 September 2019 15:43

I hope that, at the end, you thanked them in Vietnamese and left no tip.