Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. They thought it'd be hilarious to put on ridiculous accents and act like country hicks, spewing obscenities and strongly hinting that we're into incest. She soon left in disgust. I haven't heard back from her since. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. My dad was having a bad day and was rude from the outset, but things went to total hell when he started screaming that he'd "kill" our microwave if it didn't "shut the hell up". My girlfriend now thinks we're a family of abusive psychos. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Within minutes, they said I needed to leave. Their reason? Apparently, I was mocking her dad's speech impediment. I also have one but they wouldn't believe me. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. They thought it would be funny to pretend that they're nudists. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her father looked me up and down, said, “No” then went back to his TV. My girlfriend immediately broke up with me and threw me out. I even had to get a really expensive taxi home, because we’d driven in her car and I had no idea what part of the city I was in. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my dad. I thought it was a good idea at the time, at least until he took her aside for a private chat. During the chat, he told her all about my two previous marriages and advised her to "get out while you can". FML
Today, I took my boyfriend to dinner to meet my parents. He agreed to be on his best behavior, but when my mom told us about some shady stuff going on at her job, he replied that it sounded "fishier than Justin Bieber's cunt." We were quickly kicked out. FML
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Top comments
picante72 24
Git-r-back
L2U7A_E5I9A2E8H 20
If she doesn't get your family's "interesting" humor then maybe it was a good thing to find out now.
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Comments (77)
cosicosei 22
You sir, have an awesome sounding family. That's hilarious!
mario2012 18
No
cosicosei 22
No what, exactly?
mario2012 18
They aren't awesome and not funny.
Trisha_aus 15
Who shit in your cereal Mario?
cosicosei 22
Sounds like something has crawled up your ass and stolen all the funny out of you.
DFresh503 8
Sounds like incest is not a joking matter for ol' Mario there. Maybe it was his parents that shat in his cereal?
corporatescoundr 25
Well, you can always... I mean, you can... Did you ever think of... That sucks... Hopefully you can get your parents to explain it was a joke. Or you could pretend you're a swag head(or whatever they're called) around their friends.
jayjay76 5
well she obviously does not have a sence of humor
Grauncho 27
And you obviously don't have a sense of spelling.
ShyAnn29 14
So 13 misspelled a word, get over it!
profoundkisses 18
You have a hilarious family
ClaireWinchester 17
I definitely want to be that kind of parent XD
DFresh503 8
Holler at your brother, see if you can be that kind of parent! Hahaha
soldiat_fml 17
...Your parents have a weird sense of humor.
Yellow_Fish79 11
Umm... well you probably shouldn't have done that since it was the first time meeting them? like how could that have been a good idea? lol
ksks1234 33
He should not have parents? Let his girlfriend meet them, ever? Know the parents would do this?
ShyAnn29 14
I don't think OP expected his parents to act like that.
evan_7899 28
This may be the single most retarded comment I've ever read
lotusenta 14
She's dating you, not your family. Maybe they did that to weed out someone who would be that kind of a person.
mrsnugglefunny 10
Your parents are ******* hilarious sorry OP
zenrael 21
Your family sounds awesome