By Anonymous - 30/08/2013 21:05 - United States - Utica

Today, my wife appropriated our savings to finance her crazy, midlife crisis idea of designing and marketing Cheez Whiz dildos. FML
I agree, your life sucks 41 595
You deserved it 3 443

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No funny/clever comment this time. This is just fucked up. Your wife needs help.

Come on, OP. Let your wife follow her cheesy dreams. There must be lots of cheese lovers who love cheese so much that they would date it and fuck it.

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Come on, OP. Let your wife follow her cheesy dreams. There must be lots of cheese lovers who love cheese so much that they would date it and fuck it.

OP's wife is a genius

What's so genius about making a cheese whiz dildo?

#1 this would be a dream come true for me. my two favorite things combined. no way this could go wrong

this shall cause the fry meme to become a lot more popular

#14, the most genius part is that it's going to be edible...

Last time i checked, you don't date a dildo.

But it's so cold-hearted to just fuck it and leave it. You should at least take it dancing before.

No funny/clever comment this time. This is just fucked up. Your wife needs help.

Ya talk about blowing away his money...

How exactly does one combine sprayable cheese product and plastic dicks?

I don't want to know...

When you cum Cheez Wiz shoot out the other end and into your mouth? ... A little too graphic?

Not graphic enough 18...what do you do if you have a miss fire and end up with Cheese Whiz in your eye?

Think South Park's rendition of Shake Weights, only a dildo and Cheez Whiz instead.

Is Cheez Whiz good on fish?

That's the magic of it, #3. That's why she has this potentially million dollar idea and you are left wondering how this idea would work ;-)

#20 I can think of worse things that can get in your eye...

Some of us dream of being doctors, others shoot to becoming a famous actor, and I guess a very small group want to design Cheez Whiz dildos.

Or Whizdos for short

What's Cheez Whiz? Is that just a cheese flavored dildo? Sounds kinky.

Sounds kinda gross

It's spray-able cheese in a can.

I was going to make some cheesy joke but...

You have our parmesan.

It better be a gouda one.

I'm feta up with all these cheese puns. I think we cheddar stop

Lets Brie this nonsense to an end

She should expand the food product line to other condiments like whipped cream, chocolate syrup, caramel, ketchup. She could have it automatically dispense baby oil and spermicide too.

Not sure the spermicide and cheese would taste that great together.

I dont think spermicide could ever taste could no matter the flavors involved

I'm confused. If the spermicide works, you don't need the baby oil, do you?

why would she need spermicide for a dildo?

I hear there's a great market for those currently, now is it the version that sprays the cheez wiz or simply tastes like it?

She could be on to something, OP, but just in case, maybe you should hide some of your money from her.

Cheez whiz? She really couldn't come up with a better flavor to start with?