By Anonymous - 30/08/2013 21:05 - United States - Utica

Today, my wife appropriated our savings to finance her crazy, midlife crisis idea of designing and marketing Cheez Whiz dildos. FML
I agree, your life sucks 41 641
You deserved it 3 452
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Schizomaniac 24

No funny/clever comment this time. This is just fucked up. Your wife needs help.

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Nyx_fml 23
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Come on, OP. Let your wife follow her cheesy dreams. There must be lots of cheese lovers who love cheese so much that they would date it and fuck it.

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Nyx_fml 23
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Come on, OP. Let your wife follow her cheesy dreams. There must be lots of cheese lovers who love cheese so much that they would date it and fuck it.

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Shy_Anne 10
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OP's wife is a genius

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puggypark 14
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What's so genius about making a cheese whiz dildo?

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jessBeAqueen 13
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#1 this would be a dream come true for me. my two favorite things combined. no way this could go wrong

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hghrider123456 9
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this shall cause the fry meme to become a lot more popular

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nurchok 15

#14, the most genius part is that it's going to be edible...

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SJParker 13
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Last time i checked, you don't date a dildo.

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Nyx_fml 23
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But it's so cold-hearted to just fuck it and leave it. You should at least take it dancing before.

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Schizomaniac 24

No funny/clever comment this time. This is just fucked up. Your wife needs help.

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K410 18

Ya talk about blowing away his money...

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i_wuz_nver_here 31
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How exactly does one combine sprayable cheese product and plastic dicks?

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ptoka 20
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I don't want to know...

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helen_ellexo 22
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When you cum Cheez Wiz shoot out the other end and into your mouth? ... A little too graphic?

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clemsi 20
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Not graphic enough 18...what do you do if you have a miss fire and end up with Cheese Whiz in your eye?

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MrConcise 34
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Think South Park's rendition of Shake Weights, only a dildo and Cheez Whiz instead.

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DKjazz 20

Is Cheez Whiz good on fish?

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radiocaf 29
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That's the magic of it, #3. That's why she has this potentially million dollar idea and you are left wondering how this idea would work ;-)

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helen_ellexo 22
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#20 I can think of worse things that can get in your eye...

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ghostanimal 8
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Some of us dream of being doctors, others shoot to becoming a famous actor, and I guess a very small group want to design Cheez Whiz dildos.

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johobus28 26
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Or Whizdos for short

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singer0421 32
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What's Cheez Whiz? Is that just a cheese flavored dildo? Sounds kinky.

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ydi_4_suking 20
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Sounds kinda gross

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CharresBarkrey 15

It's spray-able cheese in a can.

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MrGoodTimes 4
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I was going to make some cheesy joke but...

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Bluekaren16 19
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You have our parmesan.

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WompWompWomp123 7

It better be a gouda one.

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Spider_Web 11

I'm feta up with all these cheese puns. I think we cheddar stop

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zwillyc 3

Lets Brie this nonsense to an end

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picante72 24
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She should expand the food product line to other condiments like whipped cream, chocolate syrup, caramel, ketchup. She could have it automatically dispense baby oil and spermicide too.

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soldiat_fml 17

Not sure the spermicide and cheese would taste that great together.

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shanannygians07 28
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I dont think spermicide could ever taste could no matter the flavors involved

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Epikouros 31

I'm confused. If the spermicide works, you don't need the baby oil, do you?

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Dannie1308 11
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why would she need spermicide for a dildo?

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LukeE45 10
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I hear there's a great market for those currently, now is it the version that sprays the cheez wiz or simply tastes like it?

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Squirrel1256 15

She could be on to something, OP, but just in case, maybe you should hide some of your money from her.

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TheDrifter 23

Cheez whiz? She really couldn't come up with a better flavor to start with?

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