Today, my boss let me sit in on a board meeting. It was awesome until the guy next to me let out a vile fart, then looked at me in disgust, causing the others to look at me in disgust too. When I told my boss what really happened, he told me to grow up and stop blaming the other guy. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I accidentally farted at a board meeting. My boss thought it came from the guy sitting next to me and gave him hell for being a pig. I was too mortified to say anything, even when the guy blamed it on me, which caused my boss to rage at him for lying and then to kick him out. FML
Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML
Today, I was at a big meeting at work. The CEO was reaming the hell out of us for our recent poor profits, when I accidentally let rip a vile fart. I was then subjected to a 10 minute tirade of abuse for "trying to be a funny man", and told that whatever small chance I had for a promotion is now gone. FML
Today, I was in a meeting at work, trying to keep my composure. I quietly shifted in my chair and accidentally let out a fart. It echoed in the conference room, and everyone stared at me in stunned silence. My boss sarcastically said, “Well, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.” FML
Today, the VP of my company stopped by my desk to personally deliver praise on my recent performance. I watched in helpless horror as the noxious fart I had just released slapped him in the face. He was too polite to leave but gagged through his entire speech. If farts can kill careers... FML
Today, my boss was telling everyone his mother recently passed away and he'll be off work for a while. I'd been holding in painful gas for a while, so I tried to ease it out. It turned into a long, squeaky fart in front of everyone. Everyone glared at me as if I was trying to be funny. FML
Today, I was alone at the office. Having held it in all day, I let out the longest, worst-smelling fart of my life. The owner of the company, investigating the odd noise, opened my office door. When the stench hit him, he walked backwards all the way to his office, staring at me, in silence. FML
Today, after working alone in a room all day, I let a fart sneak out. Just then, my drop dead gorgeous boss and two new girls walked in. I could literally see them hit the stench and cringe. FML
Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML
Today, I yelled at one of my employees for trying to discreetly slip out of a meeting, and demanded he sit up front so I could make sure he stayed for the whole time. Three minutes later, he shat his pants. FML
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Top comments
pkts11 16
Sounds like the other guy needs to grow up and not blame it on other guy
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
I'm saying it now: Nobody make a damn "shitty situation" pun. On topic: Yeah, it's embarassing, but it's not the end of the world. Just don't sit next to them again.
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Comments (53)
LeashaJoy5595 28
Sounds like you work with a 12 yr old. That's terribly elementary that he would blame it on you!
WasabiMars 21
And this is where the prank war starts. To start with, you can put ghost chili powder in his sandwich or liquid ass his office.
sdroze1389 31
I hear you can do exciting things with 50 bucks worth of ping pong balls and a cabinet. then when it's time to escalate, bring a live chicken into play.
cmac86 23
Wow. I'm intrigued as to how this would work. Sounds hilarious!
sdroze1389 31
which one? the pong balls, you open a cabinet and hold a piece of cardboard in front of it and fill it with balls. then close the doors and slide the board out leaving hundreds of balls in a cabinet waiting to be opened
Colon_Man 17
No. The other one... :)
Brandi_Faith 33
That ping pong ball idea sounds awesome! I can just picture these balls falling out everywhere and bouncing around. It would take forever to find them and pick them all up which just makes it so much better!
sdroze1389 31
add bouncy balls for added chaos if it's a high cabinet like in a break room kitchen. and have an assistant, makes it way easier to set it up fast
Notore 32
Well that sucks
watermelon15 35
Shrug it off, it's not that big of a deal
tranced_ 45
fart you if it's not that big of a deal
sdroze1389 31
Well that's the first time I've herd of a board meeting being described as awesome. do pie charts get you hard or something?
PenguinBitch 43
Now you know who the company jackass is.
tehdarkness 21
That guy is brilliant! Mean, but a farting genius!
Ethan_Anonymous 28
Lol
MCRbae 17
The other guy is the one that needs to grow up
PhoenixMartinez 30
Well, that must really stink... ... ..... .. Sorry, couldn't help it.