Hard no

By LoveDrug - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Ireland

Today, the only guy showing slightly any interest in me is a Nazi-obsessed psychopath. He uses lovely pick-up lines such as, "Hey, do you know how much it hurts to staple your hand?" FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 329
You deserved it 2 960
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Top comments

FernandoTorres_fml 0

Say "No, but you're about to find out", then staple the shit out of his hand. Yeah... that would be hilarious :')

53 3
caancoha 0

I prefer when my neo-nazi lover roleplays in the bed. She likes to call me Anne Frank and punish me for being a hideaway jew.

30 11

Comments

Starfire22 5

*sigh* sounds dreamy ;) fyl op, sorry hon!

1 0
mirkilos 0

how long does it takes to put a fml thingi...?

0 0
perdix 29

You sound desperate and I'll guess you are sexually inexperienced. Here's what ya do: Put on your Eva Braun wig and tell him to drop trou so you can salute Der Fuhrer. Let him blitz your krieg for a few months until you learn some good technique. On D-Day, shoot him in a bunker and start ******* French, British and American guys. Forget the Russians, you'll get an iron beef curtain from them!

7 1
sugarbabyxoxo 2

win for perdixxx. hahaha ... butt Russian boys and German boys are the best! I'm friends with mostly Russian/German. :) hahahah and I'm German. XD

0 0
perdix 29

Thanks. I've heard the best guys are Americans, especially the older, more mature ones. Among them, the slightly creepy ones really know how to show a girl a good time. That's just what I heard ;)

1 0
Moscow_fml 0

Don't forget the Polish! ^^ We've had our differences, but i'm sure you didn't MEAN to take our country and split it with Russia. ;) Wooh Europe!

1 0
scrapytiger3 0

haha. FMLs are getting pretty dumb. just sayin

2 0
CallMeHush 0

Put some staples in your hand and give him a tug?

0 0
awesomechica1229 5

Hey girl, anybody would ask for that in a man, sieze him before someone else does!

0 0
purplemnm 9

Webb sie nicht wollen, dass ihn, nehme ich ihin, ich liebe Nazi/Jewish rolle spielen. translate it your own damn self.

0 1
aardvarkish 15

Everyone who doesn't own a copy of Thriller, leave the room now!!!

0 0
mikosquak 6

I don't know whats worse. he/she being so conceited he/she thinks that was a pick up line, or someone wanting so much attention they staple their hand.

0 0
sugarbabyxoxo 2

@ 69, I almost power puked when I seen your picture. hahahha. and as for this I embrace being German :) I love it hahah I'm not a Nazi though, hahaha butt I don't like the Jews beliefs! I don't put them in ovens about it though! ahahahahah

0 0
purplemnm 9

#83 just becoz your mothers fathers grandmothers aunt was 1/4 German doesn't make you one. I's trolliiiiinnn!!! jk, I'm German too...pure blood all the way back you?

0 0
mikosquak 6

im 1/3 nazi german 1/3 jew 1/3 mexican made a beautiful species! look how i turned out!

0 0
sugarbabyxoxo 2

pure blood!! :) mom and dads side are both pure breads lol

0 0
sugarbabyxoxo 2

@ snickerdoodles bigot- One who is narrrowly or intolerantly devoted to his or her opinions and prejudices. This word is a general term that applies to everyone (racists, anti-Semites, misogynists, homophobes and xenophobes). how am I that.

0 0
sugarbabyxoxo 2

why are you a ******* Jew or something snick? sorry I'm Agnostic! so be happy woth your beliefs, and carry on. don't even say I'm anything cause your Jewish and I said the picture on #69 is discusting! I'm allowed an opinion. so are you. butt correct me, how the **** do I fit that criteria, I have black friends, I'm bi sexual, I don't preach, and I'm not predjidus or however it's spelt. so give me a good reason how I am what you called me.

0 0
purplemnm 9

whoa we have so much in common sugar...0_o

0 0
sugarbabyxoxo 2

snick! actually I'm not against Jews! I disagree with your belief's! so technically your a hypocrate for saying that! just because I don't believe the same things as you, and the fact that I'm Agnostic doesn't make me a "bigot". I think you are for calling me names cause I don't like the Jewish beliefs. never said I didn't like jewish people. I have Jewish friends. so suck a fat one!

0 0
whataloadofbull 0

Snick, you don't need to classify everyone according to your labels. Just because she doesn't agree with Jewish beliefs doesn't make her a bigot of certain religious groups. For instance, I don't agree with the deification of some users for their apparent wittiness but that doesn't mean I don't think they're funny at times and hate them if I knew them in person...

0 0