Yuck, I'm sorry, OP. I hope this isn't the sort of thing that happens often (him getting drunk and pissing in a spot that isn't the toilet, I mean). If it is, he needs to get help.

He's not that unique. /eyeroll

I feel your pain... I got projectile vomit slung on to me by my husband.. while we were at a friends house. Needless to say we put him back in the bathroom to sleep in the rest of the night and I was thankful I had extra clothes in my car.

As a man, you are hereby entitled to one free Dick Punch, time and place to be determened solely by you with no forewarning whatsoever.

Next time you should put a diaper on him.

congratulations on writing in true FML style. Sorry you got pissed on though.

Some people are into that. But I take it that you're not one of them. Sorry, OP.

I don't see the pepper symbol!?!? Where is it cause that's just hot.

plot twist he wasnt drunk at all and just wanted to piss on you.

My dad did this to my mom once. He was never much of a drinker but he got wasted one night and I was woken up by my mom screaming because he peed on her. she was smacking him and kicked him out of the house and made him sleep on the front porch