Today, my dad farted loudly at the dinner table, mom called him a disgrace of a human being, dad called her an uptight cow, she slapped him, and 10 minutes later they were upstairs having sex. This isn’t even that unusual, this is just Wednesday night dinner time. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, while having dinner, my boyfriend decided to tell everyone about our sex life. It wouldn't have been too bad except my father was sitting right next to me. My boyfriend's excuse was that he wanted to make my dad laugh. He didn't laugh. FML
Today, my wedding celebration came to an awkward pause when my dad slapped my mom across the face and called her a whore after she admitted to having an affair. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said, "That was my daughter." FML
Today, my dad opened my fridge, let rip a horrible fart into it, then closed it and said "There ya go, a little somethin' for supper." FML
Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML
Today, I could hear my parents having sex from the other end of my house. My mom set the stove on fire because she forgot she was cooking. FML
Today, my husband and my daughter engaged in a fart war. Guess who go to do a pile of shitty laundry, while the other texted his friends about the “hilarious” incident? FML
Today, I finally told my parents I would be changing bedrooms because I could no longer stand hearing them having sex, which is awkward and disturbing. Later, my dad came and asked me quietly if I thought my mom sounded "satisfied." FML
Today, I met my new boyfriend’s family for the first time. Unfortunately for me, his dad walked in to ask what we wanted for dinner while we were having sex. Even worse was that my boyfriend kept going while his dad was there, and his dad later said he was glad I was “the woman”. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 30
I'm not surprised. To some, domestic disputes are an aphrodisiac. My guess is that the adrenaline rush caused by activating the fight-or-flight response causes effects including horniness. I should get a grant to study this!
Vesi 29
Chris Pratt was having a scene with a co-actor and in the scene, she had to slap his face. His expression shifted to WTF? and said do that again.. She redid the scene and he had to stop everything. it gave him a woody. Fort some people, that short sharp pain causes that reaction and it sounds like that is a kink your dad has and your mom uses. Sorry dude.. hope you are getting to the point you can move out soon. =)
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 30
I'm not surprised. To some, domestic disputes are an aphrodisiac. My guess is that the adrenaline rush caused by activating the fight-or-flight response causes effects including horniness. I should get a grant to study this!
Vesi 29
Chris Pratt was having a scene with a co-actor and in the scene, she had to slap his face. His expression shifted to WTF? and said do that again.. She redid the scene and he had to stop everything. it gave him a woody. Fort some people, that short sharp pain causes that reaction and it sounds like that is a kink your dad has and your mom uses. Sorry dude.. hope you are getting to the point you can move out soon. =)
Taurus_ChicKa 36
Well, make-up sex can be very good sex. Or maybe that's their foreplay. Or a kink.