Today, a man asked about fishing in the river that flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, after fishing for 5 hours, I finally caught a respectable-sized fish. I ran to my truck to grab the scale, and then I saw my friend laughing hysterically while holding an empty net. Apparently, the only catch of our day jumped out of the net during the 15 seconds I was gone. FML
Today, my dad and I went fishing. We both got a bite, but when we went to reel it in, both our hooks were in the catfish's mouth. He pushed me in the mud and took my hook out its mouth so he could say he caught it. FML
Today, I took my son fishing and we did quite well, catching enough for several nights worth of meals. Then, as we were packing up, the dumbass tipped the whole lot back into the sea because he somehow thought the freaking ocean was subject to catch and release. Four hours wasted FML
Today, I was at a job interview for a position I really needed. Somehow, the interviewer and I started talking about fishing. I joked, "I'm a master baiter." Needless to say, I didn't get the job. FML
Today, I went fishing. Not only did I lose the fish, I lost the entire rod. FML
Today, while I was working at a sushi restaurant, a guy told me he wanted the table next to the "koi fish tank", because he wanted to let the fish know what happens when they "cross him". FML
Today, I went fishing with friends looking to catch big redfish. During the trip, one of the men caught a 50 pound monster which I put away. At the end of the trip they wanted to take a picture with it. I went to wash off the fish in the water. Apparently the fish wasn't dead and swam away. FML
Today, I was so happy to be divorced from my asshole husband, I threw my ring off the bridge near the park where we met. As I was walking away, a diver surfaced, yelled, “I think you dropped this, miss” and threw the ring back at me. I can't catch a break today. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up after three years. I came home and when my dad asked what was wrong, I told him. His first reaction was, "Well damn it. Who'll go fishing with me now?" FML
Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to go fishing together, but he said he was busy with errands. Later, in a casual conversation with my friend, she opened up her phone to show me pictures of her fishing with my dad. FML
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Top comments
Volcan_fml 22
Who the **** makes their husband cry in public?
woainishamu 21
If he cries over his dick size, he needs to learn to grow up.
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Comments (96)
FrankHotpants 31
As if that was a legitimate complaint. Besides what kind of grow man does that.
LyraAlluse 25
I probably would have told the woman that what she said wasn't cool. Remember; never feed the trolls. This applies to people you meet in the real world as well.
LyraAlluse 25
I was actually talking about the mean wife, not the OP. The wording on my post was kind of strange so I can understand the confusion.
ozpunker 20
What a wimp
MissMarjori3 10
What kind of person laughs at a joke like that about someone you don't know? YDI for being as rude as his wife. You wouldn't like it if your gf/wife did the same thing in front of a stranger. It's emasculating and NOT funny.
KLeePrice 11
A lot of people laugh at jokes like that. How was OP to know it was true and not just a joke the wife was making?
skyeyez9 24
Maybe the wife is bitter because her husband is very selfish during sex. Or the man is one of those types that constantly makes jokes about how his wife's breasts are too small. They get the most sensitive when someone says something about their dick size. Or she is just a bitch.
judea95 16
I think F his life would be more appropriate
MysticMonkey 9
He needs to learn to take a joke.
OrySoma 11
just like his wife need to learn how to take a small dick 😂
HoboWithACondom 8
You deserve it due being an asshole!
hannahsnyder69 16
He could post an FML too
Wealthyparrot 9
What the **** is he complaining to your boss for. It's his wife that made fun of him...